And she said there is nothing wrong as the wife can't give what the husband want. And thats her freedom to choose what she want in life.
2007-05-29 03:19:57 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Since she sounds pretty self centered I doubt it would do much good to tell her that that is just a justification and that the woman would be hurt, etc.
So, tell her that:
1. He will not leave his wife for her - he probably loves his wife and she is just a toy;
2. Even if he did leave his wife for her, eventually he would do the same thing to her as this man has already shown that he has no morals or character;
3. She had better practice safe sex with this man because he already has a family and he doesn't want a baby from her and she doesn't know what he is doing when he is not with her;
4. She is wasting her time and should go find a man of her own instead of being with one that is already taken; and
5. Karma - one day she will be the one that "can't give her husband what he wants" and she will be hurt.
Just tell her that you don't approve of what she is doing and what it stands for and until she can show more integrity and grow up that you do not want her in your life in any major way. Tell her that you still love her but you just don't like her right now.
2007-06-05 06:38:53 · answer #1 · answered by bobbijoslin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't live her life for her but you can tell her that you disapprove of what she is doing. Don't punish her - let her find out how very punishing such a role can be. She has the power to screw up her own life and she'll work doubly hard at rebelling against her family just to prove she can.
The wife will find out. There will be a ton of crap to deal with and she will not find that enjoyable. Whoever she's screwing is no prize - he willingly cheats on his wife, how great could he be as marriage material? Just stick to your message - what she is doing is wrong and wrong begets more and more trouble.
2007-06-06 01:30:17 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel terrible for you... I would let the two of them be with each other, they deserve each other.
You deserve much better!!!
Focus your attention on taking good care of yourself, and your children (if you have any).
Get a good divorce attorney; consult with at least three before you decide. The right attorney can get you what you deserve, but the wrong attorney will cost you dearly.
As for the betrayal, and your broken heart. Seek support for as many sources as you can find. I hope you have other family and good friends to help you through this time. You might want to try professional counseling, or seeking help from a clergy member you trust.
Your sister is WRONG!! Maybe in time she will realize this. For now, it may be best to act as though you did not have this sister.
You'll be in my prayers. Hang on...
2007-06-05 11:10:42 · answer #3 · answered by Mel W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is an adult, there is nothing you can do. She will "reap what she sows" later on. This will catch up to her eventually.
She can choose to live her life the way she wants. All you can do is be there for her when she realizes her mistakes.
My best friend was with a married man. He was separated and I encouraged her to wait until the divorce was finalized. She didn't listen to my advice.
Now he has gone back to his wife and my best friend is heartbroken. All I do is sit there and listen. If she asks for advice, then I'll give it to her. Until then, I keep my mouth shut.
2007-05-29 03:29:23 · answer #4 · answered by Erica, AKA Stretch 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she's fooling around with a married man - well, yes, it's bad. But it's also her life. You spoke your piece and now it's up to her to either take your advice or leave it.
On the other hand, it's also not your place to bail her out of whatever jam she has gotten into because of her bad choices.
If she's messing with your husband, however, it's time to talk to your husband - about his behavior. with your sister. And proceed from there. Yes, this may mean breaking up with two-timing husband - and Sister the tramp.
2007-05-29 03:44:47 · answer #5 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pray she will grow up! all these people saying some pretty harsh things on here,bottom line she is still your little sister!!!
but still don`t turn a blinds eye to her!!!!!
she is young (sounds like) and buying into what these jerks are telling her,not realizing they`ll say just about anything to get it.
2007-06-05 02:58:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My youngest sister destroyed my marriage. We divorced because she is having an affair with my husband (friendship)
I have not spoken to her in 4 years and do not care to have a relationship with her. She has made her bed let her lay in the dirt. Don't drag yourself into that slum. She is only trying to justify what she has done. Let her live her life with this guy, with out her family. It teach your children that this type of behavior is acceptable. What goes around comes around and she will get what she deserves one day. Don't have anything to do with her.
2007-05-29 03:27:29 · answer #7 · answered by springer 3 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Limit your contact with her. She is sounding very selfish. Any sister or friend I have known that is "the other woman" is off my get together with list. You do not have to approve of her life choices. Who wants to hang out wth a T.W.I.T. (Terrible Woman Instigating Trouble) that likes hanging out with a liar and a cheat?
2007-05-29 03:31:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't deal with her. Time and the deeds that she have done to others will take care of her. When she find someone she really love and a home wrecker such as herself comes along and rip her world apart.
2007-06-04 22:21:13 · answer #9 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's right that she should be free to lead her life as she chooses without being judged by you. If you feel that her life is immoral (and I would agree with that), then you have the choice to not lead your life in a similar manner. But it's HER life.
2007-06-05 16:42:54 · answer #10 · answered by Bubbeh C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋