You have already become emotionally attached to this other person. Shouldn't you stop talking to them even if you are depressed and talking to this other person makes you happy?
2007-05-29 00:52:15 · 30 answers · asked by Kenny F 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You should have stopped playing this game WAYYYYY before you became emotionally attached. What you are engaging in is called an "emotional affair" and it can be just as devastating to a marriage as the real thing. Stop it now! Don't make excuses. You are playing with fire. If you are REALLY depressed, see a health professional.
2007-05-29 00:55:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I went through this same thing. I got married but was emotionally attached to this other guy. It did more harm than good. It put a major strain on my marriage and almost ended it. The other guy also turned out to be a liar and a cheat himself. He wound up hurting me and saying all these mean things about me. I understand were you are coming from with being depressed and talking to he/she makes you feel better. But you need to find another thing in life that makes you feel better rather than another person. Since this guy has been out of my life, it was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. Sure I miss him, but in the end it was the better choice.
2007-05-29 02:07:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ever hear the phrase "My wife just doesn't understand me"? This is the line of begining to make another person more emotionally important than your spouse. As you said "shouldn't you stop talking to them.......". Depression is a genuine illness that needs to be treated professionally. If your relationship with your wife is not fulfilling then perhaps marriage guidance counselling is where you should be bearing your soul.
Also, you are being very inconsiderate of this other person, you have placed them in a position of being privvy to your inner most thoughts and feelings. You have given them false hope of something more because you have entangled them in your emotional web.
Counselling is your best course of action for you at this time. Follow your own words of stopping.
2007-05-29 01:05:23 · answer #3 · answered by sag_kat2chat 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Having friends of the opposite sex can be a good thing....but letting it go too far when you are already married to someone else is NOT a good thing. This is how marriages end and affairs start. You need to figure out what has made you depressed and fix THAT. If you are having marital problems, then you need to discuss things with your wife first and figure out if you want to stay married before you start something up with someone else.
2007-05-29 00:56:55 · answer #4 · answered by traceylenore 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are needing this woman in your life because there is something lacking in your marriage. If you are depressed when you dont speak to her, then you have to decide if there is a way you can get whatever is lacking in your marriage back. If you think the marriage is over or you have fallen out of love with your wife, then you should talk to your wife about it. I certainly wouldnt be continuing this relationship with this woman until you are free to do so. Either leave your wife and carry on the relationship with this other woman, or work it out with your wife. Maybe go to counselling to see if those feelings you once felt for your wife can come back. You loved her once, you can love her again. You need to take some time out and decide where you want your future to head. If there is no future with your wife and you dont want there to be, then end it now. You are not being fair to your wife by carrying on this emotional relationship with this other woman. Allow your wife in....allow her to help you become happy again.
2007-05-29 01:04:37 · answer #5 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honestly, I think we know the answer to this one, when it is to the point that you have to ask this it is time to stop. I am not judging you I am in the same place as you, my friend understands and makes me feel better, I too am getting emotionally attached to a point where he is constantly on my mind. But I stay faithful and appreciate this friendship as such. I sure don't want to sometimes though, that said, hope you will work this out before it affects your marriage too much...
2007-05-29 02:42:38 · answer #6 · answered by loner6990 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think your question has to do with : When do you stop or how far is too far. Not whether you should talk to this other person or not.
Here is my rule of thumb:
If you can openly tell your significant other everything you talk about with this other person, show the emails, etc. then there is no problem. But if you think there are things that you are hiding from your spouse, then you are going too far.
It's that simple.
2007-05-29 01:14:13 · answer #7 · answered by Tourang B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you have specified "emotionally attached", then the answer is clear. You are compromising your marriage by continuing to be close to the other person. If you want to stay married, learn how to talk to your spouse about your life rather than taking it outside.
2007-05-29 00:57:33 · answer #8 · answered by dawnb 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If I understand your Q correctly - you are married, and you have a friend of the opposite sex that makes you happy.
You should be talking to your spouse. Talking to this other person will cause problems between you and your spouse. Before you realize it, it may lead to adultery. In all actuality, if your spouse is in the dark about your emotions with this friend you have, it already has.
Get rid of the friend, look to your spouse.
2007-05-29 01:02:30 · answer #9 · answered by Opr13 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, I speak to women alot i've been married for 7 years. It would be different if the converstations were inappropriate or I was seeking to cheat or something. But just being friendly and being a good conversationalist doesn't have to stop.
2007-05-29 01:23:05 · answer #10 · answered by spjp p 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋