i've known this guy from work who happens to be a friend too, and lately we became closer and decided to take it to the next level,but we have an understanding that this is not a commitment and we can go on with our own lives and will never be in each others way if someone new comes along. i'm just prpbably afraid to fall in love with him in a long run be hurt when that time comes.
2007-05-28 15:42:35 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
WOW...it seems there are a lot of similar questions like this. Could be they were always here and I didn't notice them until yesterday evening. This is when my "friend" that I had sex with decided that we should be just be friends. And so from last night until today, I've been kicking myself for taking our friendship to an intimate level. He tried to make sure I understood that he wasn't looking for a commitment....that he was just dating. We were supposedly dating. But though I knew that he wasn't ready for a commitment, I thought I had a chance. He said he was dating until he found someone that he wanted to commit to. Since we got along so well as friends, and because I got to know him as this really great guy, I thought I had a chance. Didn't figure that I would just turn out to be a sex buddy. And since I happen to be one of those people who get attached because being intimate is a very sacred thing to me, here I sit, hurt that I was stupid enough to think I could "go there" and there not be any consequences. So my advice to you is to really think about what it is you are expecting, how you really feel and what you are really getting out of the relationship. If it's not what you want and if you are feeling used...GET OUT NOW! Good luck with your decision making. Look into your heart and your gut. It won't steer you wrong. My problem is...I didn't listen to mine.
2007-05-28 16:37:40 · answer #1 · answered by The Lord's Child 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think you are going to take this more seriously than him--and let's face it, most normal ladies get emotionally attached with a sexual partner--then I would be very careful getting your itch scratched by this guy.
There may be times when friends with benefits works for you--you just have to decide if this is one of those times.
I don't see how normal, well-adjusted people can use sex as a recreational tool with much success. Believe me, I've been having sex for over 20 years and have definitely had my moments of FWB. At the time, I thought it was a great way to get some without the commitment. But in hindsight, it certainly wasn't the best sex I've ever had, and it wasn't really without consequences either. I did learn from my experiences though, and I would be hypocrite to tell you not to experiment with it. For me, I can honestly say its not the brightest idea ever hatched up. ANd as far as this being a trend, the term FWB is rather new, but people have been doing it since the dawn of mankind!
2007-05-28 15:54:46 · answer #2 · answered by wildatheart 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
being very truthful.. one you either really like this guy and need to not let your fears get in the way because you always regret the things you miss out on and if it dosen't work it will make you a stronger person.. Or two you are very depressed with your life which is what i was when i had friends with benefits.. So if this is what the problem is yes the sex is always nice but it's just going to go away. Its a temporary fix.So i hope you really like him and give him a chance because the best things in sex comes from a friend...
2007-05-28 15:52:05 · answer #3 · answered by mabrams258 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's no more common that in the past. However these things never end well, someone always gets hurt. You can't have sex and someone not fall in love, it's too powerful of an emotion.
Someone is going to get their heart broken.
2007-05-28 15:47:18 · answer #4 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh my gosh...dont do it! i had the same relation with a best friend of mine a long long long time ago and realized i was really into him and could not handle him seeing other women, never told him how i felt but we continuously flirted and acted like we were together...i fell out of the emotional path and he fell on the emotional path, bad mouthed the men i was dating and even the serious boyfriend i ended up with (the relation had stopped of course) caused so much drama in my serious relationship at that time because he still expected me to hang out with him like i have all the time in the world...it'll just be a big mess!
2007-05-28 15:51:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had friends with benefits arrangements for a long time, and they are the best. But you absolutely have to decide for yourself that you are not interested in a serious relationship or it won't work! If there is any chance at all that you might develop feelings, don't do it. But if you can honestly say all you want is a no strings attached fling, then it can be the perfect relationship. I have never fallen in love with any of my "friends". Never had one end badly.
2007-05-28 15:47:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
More common than you think. If you just want the benefits, don't kiss we having sex. That is where sex turns into feelings. Also, don't do it missionary because your eyes and bodies connect to much. Just keep it casual and don't cuddle. Good Luck
2007-05-28 15:47:45 · answer #7 · answered by Ducci 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For all of my buddies, we greet one yet another with hugs. With me close buddies, it somewhat is a hug and a kiss on the cheek. as quickly as I meet new adults it somewhat is in many circumstances a hand shake yet as quickly as I meet adults who I even have known for a whilst it somewhat is the two a hug or an air kiss, that's what one and all does in the section I stay in.
2016-10-30 01:02:43 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
friends with benefits is soooooo trashy in my opinion -- just because other people do it doesn't mean you have to...like, for example, there are many emo kids who slash their wrist now-a-days, but does that mean you should be doing that?
plus, this friend is going to think that you are easy and probably start seeing you for just your body and then if you decide that you want to be more with him...he will prob. say "no" and then if you want to just be friends(without benefits), he will prob. not wanna be ur friend...but this is ur decision...just don't brag about this to your friends or ... might come of as needy, trashy, easy, etc.
2007-05-28 15:49:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Someone will get their heart broken here, it always happens.
And Jersey Girl: Women do not always get more "emotionally attatched" than men, they just promote it a lot more.
2007-05-28 15:55:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋