I realize this is a question that comes up way too often on Yahoo answers, but I still felt the need to read different opinions regarding a particular situation that's currently going on with me. I guess most importantly is the fact that I am legal, and this officer was off duty. I met him at the police station about a week ago, we've gone out twice. The very first time going out, after basic conversation, he asks about my virginity. He appears fascinated with the fact that I am one. Minutes go by, and I start to feel uncomfortable with the constant, very awkward questioning, I realize he's expressing what he wants to do with me, some statements becoming more and more graphic. I felt extremely uneasy and nervous, and also disappointed, all this coming from a very experienced police officer. I think you readers get a feel of the situation and what I'm trying to explain. Should I just take this as a grain of salt? (Continued below)...
2007-05-28 12:10:30 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Law Enforcement & Police
I realize this is rather typical fantasy-talking of a lot of men, regardless whether or not their in law enforcement. But the feeling I got was just almost disgusted. But because of his rank, I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt. So what's your opinions, and how would you take it?
Thanks in advance.
2007-05-28 12:12:08 · update #1
Sorry to include more info, but someone mentioned we are dating. We are NOT dating, at that moment of meeting him, that same day he offered to buy me lunch. There is a significant age difference. Not a huge difference, but enough to make a difference in the situation.
2007-05-28 12:16:50 · update #2
If he makes you feel uncomfortable.. don't have anything to do with him again. If he keeps bothering you.. tell him to leave you alone. If he keeps up.. that's harassment, and you should take legal steps to deal with it.
2007-05-28 12:15:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 1⤋
Maria, after reading all the details that you were able to provide, and considering all the circumstances; including you being of legal age, him being off duty, nothing physical taking place, and a second date, I'm afraid that is not harassment. Sounds like old fashioned lust to me, it's up to you whether you want to continue a relationship or not. However, I want to say I understand why you felt so uncomfortable. Sometimes it's difficult to speak up in such a situation. If you like him, tell him that kind of talk makes you uncomfortable, you seem to think he's alright, he should understand, and no big deal.
Woodyhou and CGIV76, I don't see why this particular question should without a doubt be in relationships. This is a common occurence with law enforcement, especially since it involves an officer.
2007-05-28 13:20:25 · answer #2 · answered by Unknown 2 · 4⤊ 2⤋
NO, it's a guy being stupid. As you said you met him OFF DUTY. He did nothing using the "power of his office". This should be in relationships, that's where it belongs. The reason this does not belong here is this is about dating. If you were dating a marine would it be posted in the military section. If you were dating a wrestler would this be in the wrestling section. If you were dating a lawyer or a waiter this would not be an issue about his job. Bottom line is this, it's about dating an idiot, his profession has nothing to do with it and this is not a common occurrence in law enforcement.
2007-05-28 13:06:10 · answer #3 · answered by woodyhou 4 · 2⤊ 3⤋
it is not sexual harrassment, but obviously you are not ready for what he wants, and he don't want much, i'll tell you that. what i mean is, if you sleep with him, he is not gonna be your boyfriend. I don't know why his being a police officer is even relevent. some may think he's a jerk. but alot of women probably react quite favorably to his advances. if it wasn't working, he would try a tactic that would. bottom line, he ain't for you. unless you want to be with him and are just looking for someone to tell you it's fine. in that case, go get him girl. but you are gonna be in for the ride of your life.
2007-05-28 23:16:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In your additional information you say you were not dating. You also say he was off duty, offered to buy you lunch, and you accepted. Most of us call that a date. I agree with the majority here. This guy appears to by a jerk, but being and officer has nothing to do with the situation.
2007-05-28 15:02:42 · answer #5 · answered by STEVEN F 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
it has nothing to do with sexual harassment.what ever this guy is going evidently does not bother you that much or you would not have gone out with him 2 times.pull your head out and quit dating the guy.if he harasses you after that then go to internal affairs and file a complaint
2007-05-28 22:56:08 · answer #6 · answered by charlsyeh 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Stay away from him, he sounds like bad news. Why did you go out with him twice if he made you feel uneasy the first time around?
2007-05-28 13:52:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
ok i've dated (gone out with) before whether it is a lunch date or dinner date...you were dating. you obviously like him, just tell him that it makes you uncomfortable and i am sure he will stop. no where in your question did you mention that you asked him to stop talking about your "v".
I think maybe you are trying to trap him into a harrassment suit, which would be a shame. he is just trying to get lucky.
2007-05-28 12:30:36 · answer #8 · answered by TG79 5 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Yes,
there is no question you have been sexualy harassed.
If cop killers are held to stricter punishment than normal killers, cops have seperated themselves from the average population. I wish I could say this dude should be held to a higher standard, but my expiriences with cops have shown me majority are inclined to use their status totake advantage of people and situations, just as this *** hole is doing to you. Cop or not no gentleman worth your time of day would make you uncomfortable, I just hope the bastard did something illegal so he can get a feel of what it is like to be on the receiving end of the law!!!
2007-05-28 14:09:20 · answer #9 · answered by chrigity 3 · 1⤊ 6⤋
Sounds like a date to me, not sexual harassment.
If you don't like the way he was talking or acting, then make that your last date.
2007-05-28 12:27:45 · answer #10 · answered by Kevin 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋