Fibromyalgia?

Question

I have had fibro since i was 10. I have almost all the symptoms that come with it. I am constantly in pain and try to describe this to my fiance, but he doesnt seem to get it. I dont know if he is in denial or what.
I try to keep a good outlook but there are some days when i regognize, that as i just keep getting worse and worse, that i may end up not being able to work or lead a full life.
He frowns upon me taking any kind of prescribed pain killers, but at this point thats all that works. Does anyone have any natural things that have worked when they are in sever pain?
And how do you get an uncooperative partner to understand what kind of pain you are in. I have tried several times, using times he has been in pain to make him understand, he just wont. I love him so much, Please Help.

Thanks for all the support. Its not that he is controlling me, he has just seen alot of substance consumption from others around him and doesnt want it to happen to me, I understand that. Its hard when your only 20 and cant always play tennis (a favorite when i feel well) or can play, but then am in pain for 2 or 3 days after. Thanks again for all the advice.

Answer 1

I have had Fibromyalgia for 35 years. My family never believed I was sick. They don't to this day. And I have been bedridden for seventeen years because of a hip injury and Fibromyalgia. It's very difficult to make anyone understand this condition. I have enclosed a link to where I have written an article about Fibromyalgia and what you can do at home to lessen the pain. Just recently I started using this pain cream called "Blue Emu" which you can purchase at drugstore.com and I am amazed at how much it can reduce my pain. I have never used anything equal to this.

There is simply no way for anyone to understand what is going on internally with the Fibromyalgic body. Because you look absolutely normal, yet you feel like you will never perform normally again. No one can see what the problem is. And since it is not such a known illness such as cancer it does not get the respect that people with cancer would get. No one would question a cancer patient about his or her illness because everyone has heard of it. If you have bad days because of your illness with cancer no one would question it. But because Fibromyalgia has not been classified as a disease or given notoriety (such as a famous person getting FMS) it is relatively unknown.

I have enclosed a letter I have written to give to my clients to give to their family and loved ones. Make a copy of this and give it to your boyfriend. I hope it helps .

Letter to people that don't have Fibromyalgia (FMS) and/or MPS:

Having FMS/MPS means many things change, and a lot of them are invisible. Unlike having cancer or being hurt in an accident, most people do not understand even a little about FMS/MPS and its effects, and of those that think they know, many are actually misinformed.

In the spirit of informing those who wish to understand ...

... These are the things that I would like you to understand about me before you judge me...

- Please understand that being sick doesn't mean I'm not still a human being. I have to spend most of my day in considerable pain and exhaustion, and if you visit I probably don't seem like much fun to be with, but I'm still me stuck inside this body. I still worry about work and my family and friends, and most of the time I'd still like to hear you talk about yours too.

- Please understand the difference between "happy" and "healthy". When you've got the flu you probably feel miserable with it, but I've been sick for years. I can't be miserable all the time; in fact I work hard at not being miserable. So if you're talking to me and I sound happy, it means I'm happy. That's all. It doesn't mean that I'm not in a lot of pain, or extremely tired, or that I'm getting better, or any of those things. Please, don't say, "Oh, you're sounding better!” I am not sounding better, I am sounding happy. If you want to comment on that, you're welcome.

- Please understand that being able to stand up for ten minutes, doesn't necessarily mean that I can stand up for twenty minutes, or an hour. And, just because I managed to stand up for thirty minutes yesterday doesn't mean that I can do the same today. With a lot of diseases you're either paralyzed, or you can move. With this one it gets more confusing.

- Please repeat the above paragraph substituting, "sitting", "walking",
"thinking", "being sociable" and so on ... it applies to everything. That's what FMS/MPS does to you.

- Please understand that FMS/MPS is variable. It's quite possible (for me, it's common) that one day I am able to walk to the park and back,
while the next day I'll have trouble getting to the kitchen. Please don't attack me when I'm ill by saying, "But you did it before!” if you want me to do something then ask if I can. In a similar vein, I may need to cancel an invitation at the last minute, if this happens please do not take it personally.

- Please understand that "getting out and doing things" does not make me feel better, and can often make me seriously worse. Telling me that I need a treadmill, or that I just need to loose (or gain) weight, get this exercise machine, join this gym, try these classes... may frustrate me to tears, and is not correct... if I was capable of doing these things, don't you know that I would? I am working with my doctor and physical therapist and am already doing the exercise and diet that I am suppose to do. Another statement that hurts is, "You just need to push yourself more, exercise harder..." Obviously FMS/MPS deals directly with muscles, and because our muscles don't repair themselves the way your muscles do, this does far more damage than good and could result in recovery time in days or weeks or months from a single activity. Also, FMS/MPS may cause secondary depression (wouldn't you get depressed if you were hurting and exhausted for years on end!) but it is not created by depression.

- Please understand that if I say I have to sit down/lie down/take these pills now, that I do have to do it right now - it can't be put off or forgotten just because I'm out for the day (or whatever). FMS/MPS does not forgive.

- If you want to suggest a cure to me, don't. It's not because I don't appreciate the thought, and it's not because I don't want to get well. It's because I have had almost every single one of my friends suggest one at one point or another. At first I tried them all, but then I realized that I was using up so much energy trying things that I was making myself sicker, not better. If there were something that cured, or even helped, all people with FMS/MPS then we'd know about it. This is not a drug-company conspiracy, there is worldwide networking (both on and off the Internet) between people with FMS/MPS, and if something worked we would KNOW.

- If after reading that, you still want to suggest a cure, then do it, but don't expect me to rush out and try it. I'll take what you said and discuss it with my doctor.


In many ways I depend on you - people who are not sick - I need you to visit me when I am too sick to go out... Sometimes I need you help me with the shopping, cooking or cleaning. I may need you to take me to the doctor, or to the physical therapist. I need you on a different level too ... you're my link to the outside world... if you don't come to visit me then I might not get to see you.

... And, as much as it's possible, I need you to understand me.

Answer 2

Diet wealthy in darkish inexperienced leafy greens and top in omega-three fatty acids coupled with pastime could have a optimistic have an effect on on Fibromyalgia whilst irritation is a aspect. Plus, it is simply simple healthful. eight~) Therapeutic therapeutic massage can quite often cut down the severity of the aches related to Fibro. Acupuncturist customarily deal with fibromyalgia with very well outcome.

Answer 3

I have fibro, cfs, ibs ,pcos meniers ,nuralgia and spondaltias (sorry for the spelling) In my family there is four of us with fibro alone uncle, mother ,brother and me so we can understand 100% what each other go through but there are alot in the family who don't understand and Don't want to understand.
My own brother thought i was "putting" on my headaches and walk (which is all to one side) not wanting to cause a fuss i let the first "episode" go and didn't go to the hospital the second "epidsode" i lost my sight and couldn't walk fell down the stair I'd had a stroke at 32 !!! don't ever dought yourself you know your body (it screams at you often enough) you know your pain and if you needs medication, anti inflamation med's /creams .tens machiner. alternative treatment you do it because it's your body getting worse.
I would say if he is already acting like this with out being horride can you really see him 20years down the line ! because the illness at this moment in time isn't going any where however he might ..
Try to surround yourself with as much support as possible even if that support is on the internet.
Being ill and housebound for most of my life since 13 the internet has truly been a blessing.
Good Luck and God Bless

Answer 4

I have fibromyalgia along with rheumatoid arthritis, osteoarthritis, and a spinal cord injury. NO ONE will understand what you're going through unless they live with it. However, if your partner is not understanding of your needs, you've got more problems than fibromyalgia. It's not his pain so it's not his decision on what medications you need to take. If he's this controlling now, you have a rocky road ahead of you! The stress he's putting on you will make your condition worse. If I were you, I'd have a short talk with him and then I'd find someone who loved me for who I am and what I have. Your present partner is just one more pain you have to deal with.

Answer 5

One thing you need to know: chronic pain sufferer cannot get a "high" from the drugs they take. They can only get "normal" at best.

Make him read the various web sites on fibromyalgia - and then test him on how much he remembers! Make him come with you to your rheumatologist when you have an appointment and talk to the rheumatologist about it. Make him talk to other fibromyalgia patients.

Bottom line - if he won't support you because he thinks your pain is bogus, give him up. He'll only make your life miserable.

Answer 6

I have FMS for the past five years snd no one understands it unless they have it, They're are websites that explain the pain and the low feelings the sufferers indure and that is how i got my partner and family to understand some of it. If you just google th FMS you will find loads of sites on it


Best of luck

Answer 7

I do'nt have any suggestions on what you can take besides pain pills, but I would like to make a suggestion about what to do to help your boyfriend understand the pain you experience, Make a drs. appt. and take him along with you.Ask all the questions that he needs to hear the answers to. That's what I would do.

Answer 8

My father has the same thing for 25 years. sweetie i cant give you advice but i do want to say this - i do think of you and pray that the lord can help eaze your pain. I know that nothing you say can explain this to anyone.I wish you the best of luck!!!!!!!!!!!