Sometimes he's nice, sometimes he's lovely, but most of the time he makes me feel like for him having a gf is a chore. He's incredibly sensitive to the idea that someone might be telling him what to do e.g. it was my birthday and we went out for dinner. He left for a cigarette when I was still eating my meal and cracked up at me because I was upset he left me to eat alone. Apparently that means I'm even telling him when he can and cannot have a cigarette. If we have a fight his behaviour becomes violent and he punches and kicks things and trashes my house. Of course, he usually has a few drinks in him. He moved himself in not that long after we started going out, because he doesn't have time to arrange to see me. He has better things to do.
Then he'll be lovely for a while, he'll be sweet and I'll melt, feel sorry for him and forgive him.
You know, after typing this out and listening to it I'm disgusted with myself for being so soft.
2007-05-27 23:49:33 · 28 answers · asked by kalimiel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
So you have typed this out and now you know what it is you have to do. Make sure you let a friend/s know when you are going to ditch him so they can be there incase if reacts badly. Remember not to cave in if he starts to be nice and tells you how sorry he is and how fantastic you are!!! Think about all of the reasons that you have for wanting to get rid of him and stick to your guns! There are some really nice men out there who will treat you so much better. Don't put up with this type of behaviour! Go for it and good luck!
2007-05-27 23:56:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you've pretty much answered your own question
When it comes to a point in your relationship where you no longer respect the "girlfriend" version of yourself then you need to get out.
I would be pissed off if a guy lit a cigarette while I was eating dinner, and my boyfriend damn well knows this. Luckily he doesn't smoke but my friends know it as well. Its just something I don't stand for.
As for him trashing your house when he's drunk, again no excuse, he is in control when he is drunk and by letting it happen you are saying that as long as he is drunk bad behaviour is acceptable.
Becoming violent because you fight? Bad bad warning sign there,
As for "He has better things to do. "
heck you're his girlfriend, you are his house mate, its your house KICK HIM OUT
and learn how to respect yourself again, you really need to get that self respect back.
2007-05-28 06:57:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This behaviour sounds a bit like manic - which is a mental health problem. Please be careful. Ring the police to tell them that you are going to be throwing out a person with manic tendancies and that you don't know how he will react and you feel you may be in danger. They will give you a number to ring and an "incident number" to quote if you need them to come round and remove him and give you support.All the answers you have had are good advice and please make sure you change your locks and have some mates (preferably male) to be with you when you chuck this nutcase out of your life. I do wish you the very best of luck.
2007-05-28 07:04:45 · answer #3 · answered by Normsgirll 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Put his rear on the street. He is a controlling jerk!!! Tell him that if you wanted to fight with someone you would have been a boxer. If you are scared, get some family or friends to be there, and have the locks changed. You deserve a lot better than that. Just think, if you were married what he would be doing!!
HE IS A LOSER!!!!
2007-05-28 07:00:09 · answer #4 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, I think it is that you might think you deserve to be treated like this and you really don't. Kick him out. Find someone who will respect you. This is really simply. If you stay with him do you think his behavior will change? You should be the best thing he has to spend his time on. I am sure many men out there just are waiting for a woman to spend their love and time with.
2007-05-28 06:58:47 · answer #5 · answered by je 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just listen to your inner instincts if it is an object it could be you next. dont wait for that to happen this man is a control freak and will push you to the brink of no return your love will turn to fear and you wont leave him because you will become to afraid telling yourself you love him to justify you staying. so do it soon to save yourself from the torture emotional or physical abuse may bring. leaving him now and feeling sad and crying will be nothing to the hell you will get if you stay with him. let someone else be his victim good luck be brave
2007-05-28 07:03:34 · answer #6 · answered by Andrea B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a typical wife beater in the making. His needs come first and he gets stressy if you even suggest he puts you first. Now he kicks the furniture, how long before its you? If you were really in love and sure of his love and your relationship you wouldnt be asking us for advice. Follow your instincts and dump him. Find someone you can be at ease with.
2007-05-28 06:53:36 · answer #7 · answered by jeanimus 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow well actually u wanna ditch him right so i guess if you make him mad he might trash your house or well ummm hurt you phicically so i think you should get help or talk to him about his attitude well calmly if he gets rough then try to calm him down okay then when he gets calm then talk try to put him in a class for his bahavior talk with him and maybe smooth talk him okay i hope you 2 gets better and by the way you told me that then he becomes sweet right but then i dnt think you should forgive him anymore and say to him `if you really luv me then change` and then leave okay
2007-05-28 06:59:35 · answer #8 · answered by amy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you have answered your own question and deep down you know that you are worth far more than to stay with someone like him. Get shot of him and start to appreciate your self worth and enjoy your life. You will meet someone who respects you and treats you the way you deserve to be treated. Go on it's worth it.
2007-05-28 07:07:35 · answer #9 · answered by Biff 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same situation with my bf! i lost my mom friday and he hasn't even made time to see me! he ignored my text last nite he must have been out with his m8s having a good time! i wont be getting in touch with him again! i also get disgusted with my self for putting up with his behaviour, i blame myself thinking i have done something wrong!
2007-05-28 06:58:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋