The bride and groom to bring in a cake for my husband. Is it appropriate to ask the bride and her husband to also allow me to bring a cake for my husbands' birthday or would that offend the bride and groom..the groom is my husband's first cousin. I don't want to ignore my husbands birthday and we always do something for him. I would feel bad for my husband since it is his birthday.
2007-05-27 12:49:01 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Actually I'm not being selfish or a kid. My husband will understand. However I went to a wedding where the same situation occured.
2007-05-27 13:03:41 · update #1
I think you know this couple better than we do. ;-) If you think they'd be cool with it, go ahead and ask. Especially if it's going to be a family-heavy party. Just bring up the fact that it's the same day as his birthday, and that you don't want to overlook him. Offer to bring a small cake in the wedding colors. If you don't think they'd be cool with it, don't bother. Celebrate your husband's birthday at breakfast. Have fun.
2007-05-27 14:16:45 · answer #1 · answered by Flamekat 4 · 3⤊ 4⤋
I am not sure I would bring up that idea to the bride and groom as they already have so many things to take care of in planning the wedding. I am not sure if bringing your honeys birthday into the reception draws away from the focus of the bride and groom. I do think however it would be OK to ask if the person to make the first toast would mention that their is also a special birthday to celebrate then the two of you celebrate with a special dinner on another evening.
2007-05-27 18:41:47 · answer #2 · answered by Penny D 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The focus of the wedding is the bride and groom! Bringing in a cake for someone else would totally steal their thunder. Have a birthday party for him on another day, because honestly, the whole birthday cake at the wedding thing is a horrible idea. I just got married in December, and I spent over a year planning my wedding... the location, the food, the entertainment, the decorations, etc... If someone had come along and asked to use the special day I'D been planning for a year to celebrate their husband's birthday, I would've been completely appalled at the total lack of manners and tact. This idea is extremely rude!
2007-05-27 14:35:24 · answer #3 · answered by greeneyes_bjb 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Do NOT ask the bride and groom to provide a separate cake. Tacky Tacky Tacky
For me personally, if someone did anything for me like that at a wedding, I would be extremely embarrassed as I would not feel like it was appropriate. A birthday is just a day - the point is to take the time to honor someone - and that can be done anytime.
However, I do not know the dynamics of your situation. And in your case it may be acceptable.
What I would suggest is if you really want to do something - perhaps after the cake cutting, have a candle placed in your husbands piece and brought to him while leading everyone in a round of happy birthday.
Good Luck
PS - Do not do it though because you "feel bad" for your husband - that does make him sound immature. Do it because it would be fun and because all of his family will be there.
2007-05-27 13:40:09 · answer #4 · answered by apbanpos 6 · 3⤊ 3⤋
Celebrate your husband's birthday the day before or the day after the wedding. This is their day, and I'm sure your husband understands and does not want to take away from their wedding.
I have been to one wedding where they celebrated a birthday with a birthday cake along with the wedding cake, and that was because it was the birthday of the father of the groom who paid for the wedding and reception!
2007-05-27 12:56:32 · answer #5 · answered by Proud to be 59 7 · 12⤊ 1⤋
1) No, you (and your son, if he lives with you) were not expressly invited because your names were not listed on the mailing envelope. The "number of guests" is typical format for a RSVP because lets say a family of four were invited and only three could make it, they would fill in the number "3" in the "number of guests" spot on the RSVP. 2) No, it does not appear as though your son was invited. However, I would clarify this with your ex or ask your husband to do so. 3) No, you should not go because you were not invited and besides, like you say, you do not get along with him and that is why your husband takes over the interaction. By reading between the lines, I think that your son is expected to be there and the only reason your husband was invited is so he could watch after the kid and bring him home after the reception so your ex does not have to deal with his son on his wedding night, perhaps?
2016-05-19 03:41:08 · answer #6 · answered by marquerite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a birthday cake for a close family relative at my wedding, but it was my idea. Her son was the ring bearer and she had driven all the way from out of state with a nearly newborn to be there on my day and I was very touched. On the other hand, I think it is a bit much for you or your husband to request it. I am not surprised that the bulk of answers are against.
Presumably it isnt a whole day event. I'm sure you can think of something nice to do for husband on his day that isn't part of the wedding.
2007-05-27 15:08:47 · answer #7 · answered by Cindy B 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I disagree- you are being selfish. Your husband wil have other birthdays and they will have only one wedding day. And it's not as though the wedding will take up all day. Have a little celebration that morning, or leave the reception a little early to do somthing birthday related if you must celebrate on his birthday. If he can wait till the day after his birthday, have a celebration then and since family will be in town they can join in. Talk to your husband about this. I bet he'd be fine with postponing his celebration or with having it without taking away from the wedding.
2007-05-27 21:39:04 · answer #8 · answered by K S 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
I wouldnt even ask, I think that its THEIR day...How would you have felt if it was your special day and someone wanted to focus the attention on their family for a birthday? Most ordinary people would not have appreciated...especially after all the money people put into their weddings to make it a special day for the attention to be all about them. I think its great that you think about your husband and love him so much that this is a dilemna for you...but I am sure he will understand if you do something for him early or later...and I'm sure he appreciates you thinking about him and wanting to do this for him at a wedding...but I bet if you ask him he will be perfectly fine with not doing a cake on his birthday. Its a great thought, but I would not recommend even asking....it may make them feel like you dont care much about their wedding....
2007-05-27 13:33:34 · answer #9 · answered by Nikki 4 · 4⤊ 2⤋
That's just not nice to ask. Even if they say they don't mind you are still taking away from their day. You husband is not a little kid he is an adult and can have his cake the day before, for breakfast, before you go to the wedding or the day after.
2007-05-27 14:40:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋