Homeschooling?? The Effects?

Question

I want to homeschool my 2 year old daughter preschool teachings. But then I want her to go to a public school for kindergarten through 4th grade and then homeschooling her for 5th grade through 8th grade and her finishing high school at a public school. Will this effect her?

Answer 1

I have three children and have home schooled the youngest child who is now 14. The differences are unbelievable. I wish I had home schooled the other two (but they were already grown). You, the parents, are the best teachers your child can have, and it doesn't matter what level of education you have completed. Just by being with you all day and following your example, your child will learn proper behavior and your values and morals. Not the values of the school system, or the morals of other undisciplined children. Each state has different rules and laws pertaining to homeschooling. For the laws in your state and for further support, contact Home School Legal Defense Association at hslda.com. They provide legal council to all homeschoolers in the U.S. Each state also has support groups, as do most cities of any size. Don't worry about people asking how your child will be socialized (that is the most-often asked question). Your child will have better social skills than any child you know. Beware of "virtual homeschooling" offered by many public schools. These are misleading because you teach your child at home, but the public school tells you what to teach and when to teach it. Plus you would be bound to the public school tests, hours, days, and curriculum. Please seriously consider homeschooling. It will be a very rewarding experience and you won't be alone. There is plenty of support out there.

Answer 2

Let me start by saying I think it's admirable that you are exploring different schooling options and making a plan while your child is so young.

That said, I think it probably will be hard to determine at this point when you should send your child to school and when to homeschool. Maybe you should start phase one of your plan and homeschool through pre-school, and then re-evaluate at kindergarten enrollment time whether or not you want to send your child to school-- check into the local schools kindergarten curriculum and determine if your child has already learned the skills that will be taught those years. Get involved with local homeschool communities and decide if your child and you are happy with the situation as-is.

What's your reason for choosing K-4 as school years? Are you afraid you won't be able to cover the basics? You might not feel that way by the time kindergarten rolls around. Are you worried your child will suffer socially? Again, if you get your child involved with local homeschool groups, co-ops, or in outside activities (for example, girl scouts, 4-H clubs, community center after school classes, etc.) you might realize that school is not necessary for socialization.

On the other hand, if you do send your child to school, evaluate on a yearly basis if you think she should continue. Picking arbitrary grades or years to switch back and forth years in advance is probably futile, as you simply can't predict how events will unfold. After all, if it ain't broke, don't fix it-- if your daughter is thriving in public schools and you find a good middle school, why take her out if there are no problems?

And on a third hand, if you did homeschool for middle school and your child was very advanced and happy homeschooling, why bother with high school at all? Many homeschoolers just go right into college courses between ages 14 and 16 and skip high school completely.

Basically, relax, go with the flow, see what happens, and enjoy the educational adventure.

MSB

Answer 3

I've known people who have done similar (although they hadn't planned to do it that way--they pulled their kids out of school after too many issues then put them back in after a few years). Their kids were fine. Although the first year of homeschooling was very difficult--after K-4 in school, that's what the kids are used to. Just like going to school is a shift for young children to listening to an adult other than mom or dad, bringing kids home and expecting them to see you as their teacher doesn't always work so well. Especially if the kids were happy in school.

So, yes, it'll affect her--and you. It'll affect the relationship you have with her when she's in school those first 5 years. It'll affect how you will homeschool her since you will not have known her as a student for those previous 5 years and you'll only have the 4 years to find your groove, get settled, then you're sending her off again. If she doesn't want to be homeschooled, it'll negatively affect your relationship with her. On the flip side, homeschooling her for essentially middle school, if she's agreeable to it, would help her develop a better sense of self during a crucial time when kids are trying to figure out who they are. Middle school kids tend to be too focused on defining themselves by how others see them (or how they think others see them).

Those who say it'll affect her socially don't understand that she can make other friends outside of school. However, if she's a social butterfly at school, then bringing her home probably won't sit well with her because her psyche will be too used to be around people all the time and will crave that.

I'd honestly recommend just homeschooling from the start if you want to homeschool her for grades 5-8. She can go off to high school after that.

Answer 4

I think it's probably fine, although as with all of life I would allow for some flexibility. In 1st grade my son was miserable, crying every day & having stomach aches but just in school, and begging me to home school. I didn't have plans to do so, but we decided to try it and then decide whether to keep going after each year.

Needless to say after 6 years of home schooling, it looks like we will be doing this for a while. If your daughter is really happy homeschooling or in public school for that matter and you decide to continue home schooling or public school, I'm sure either would be fine. Happy home schooling!

Re: I wouldn't worry about the comments of the robotics teacher who has a taught a few homeschooled children. As he suggests this is a small sample. I would also suspect that the kind of children signing up for robotics might tend to be of a different social type than someone signing up for say cheerleading or football, for example. You might tend to find someone less adept at social skills and more interested in computers, signing up for robotics.

I also suspect some of these children he is referring to may have had Aspergers and been autism spectrum like my children. These children are often drawn to computers and robotics. They are often less adept at social skills and home schooling does not help or hurt their socialization. Although homeschooling is great for Asperger and autism spectrum kids overall and there are a lot of us parents who are doing so!

Answer 5

Actually, I feel that homeschooled youngsters are bigger socialized, in that they study to engage with many extraordinary individuals, of every age and backgrounds, and aren't constrained to a jury in their friends. On the down part, in our hs software there may be an dilemma round time leadership that turns out to stem from now not having adequate strain at dwelling. Assignments don't consistently get performed in a fair period of time. We are running on tightening up the time table to upgrade this now.

Answer 6

The negative effect would be no stability.
I guess we could argue that children adjust to most situations, but adjusting is not the same as being good for them.
First she is only two, just let her be a child, have fun, play games, and read books to her, watch some movies, make cookies, and so on.

May I suggest two books:
Better Late Than Early, and Home Grown Kids
by: Raymond, and Dorothy Moore.

Edit:
In response to G:
Children are not miniature adults, their coping, and reasoning skills are not yet developed enough.
Children should for as long as possible grow up in a stable environment; it makes them feel safe, and secure.
We are a multi generational military family; retired now; that is why we, and so many military families that transfer, or deploy often choose homeschooling.

Answer 7

Keep her busy socially. I'd also suggest she stay in touch through play dates with the friends she makes at school.

As far as her education goes if you stay focused and put in some quality hours seeing to it that she remain involved in her studies she is going to be way ahead of the game. She will probably be ready for college while she's in high school.

As the years go by ask her what her preference is. If she wants to home school in 3rd grade then allow it. If she wants to go back in 5th then allow that, too. It's so important that she be happy learning regardless of how it's accomplished. The advantages to home schooling are many as long as she's enjoying it.

Our daughter (she's 8) enjoys home schooling so much but if she ever wants to go to school she is welcome to. I wouldn't be afraid of her social skills either. She stays very busy with friends who are super sweet to those who are a little harder to love; just like in a real public school environment. When people say they lack in social skills I do believe it's true IF one doesn't see to it they constantly get that interchage and exposure to various people; children as well as adults.

I have to respond to someone who said she will have no stability. You know change is perpetual and we as adults do whatever we can to improve our lives and get through it nicely. Why wouldn't a child have the same results? Our experiences make us stronger and lead to personal growth. How many military families are there who are constantly moving from one area to another? Would someone label their children as being unstable? Hardly, in fact I personally have family members with this life and their children are fine despite the fact they move all the time and attend new schools every few years.

Make certain that you always listen to your daughter. Take her words and feelings very seriously and guide her according to her needs and desires. She'll be fine so long as you listen and respect her as an individual.

Doctor K: I spent 10+ years in education and with that experience I personally observed the disadvantages of a public school environment. You speak of the lack of social skills in home schooled children. I wish you would elaborate and be specific as to what you observed among the three students. I agree with you social skills are essential but so is education. And unfortunately in our society many children are falling behind and never catch up. Every school year many of them graduate from high school without the skills or knowledge necessary to attain certain well paying jobs. They were not taught how to learn or to love learning and have chosen not to further their education as a result. Through the years I have encountered so many adults whose spelling is very bad, I recently met up with someone who never learned to tell time, there was a young man at Home Depot the other day who could not figure out the square footage in his bedroom to buy carpeting. What should have been the focus during their school years? I say education; hands down. As I said before social skills are vital and that is why I personally see to it that our daughter associate with many children; a few who are home schooled and the majority of them who are not. I home school because I want the best education for my daughter and sadly enough but true public school cannot offer what she needs. You're right your opinion is not a popular one among here, however, I highly respect yours as I wish you would respect those of us who have opted for this form of education. I would truly appreciate, however, if you would specify what you have observed. Too many people share your opinion, and yet nobody in detail shares what they have experienced; please I ask that you do. While I respect your opinion I must add that you are certainly out of line with your comment about saving one child. My goodness, you judge thousands upon thousands of families based on your personal observation of a few........please!

Answer 8

You really should consider homeschooling from the get go. It will create to many problems socially as well as relationally, with you. Why would you not want to homeschool from the outset anyway?

Answer 9

Why do you want to home school your daughter? Does she have any special needs? Is she gifted? Do you need more bonding time? Do you have a value that are so different from what they teach at school?

I know this isn't going to be popular in this forum but here is my take.
Unless your daghter has very special needs, I would strongly recommand that you keep her in school. I coach a robotics team and I spend a lot of time with the team (more than 400 hours this year). It really gives me an opportunity to observe kids very closely. During my six years of coaching, I had the chance to observe four kids who were home schooled. One seemed OK but the other three had severe deficiencies in social skills. It was so sad to see this since two of them were really brilliant. Their parents believed putting them in other social activites such as soccer, boy scouts and such would give them enough opportunities to interact with other kids. I don't know what it is but these extra curricular activites just don't seem to provide the same level of social experience. Maybe it is different level of supervision in these activities or maybe they spend too much time with their parents. I don't know what it is but what I do observe from my limited sample of home schooled kids was that despite their parents best efforts, these kids have a long way to go to mature socially to their age level. After investing so much time on their kids, it is not hard to see why their parent would be in denial. I would like to discourage anyone from homeschooling unless it is for the special needs.

For gifted kids, you can always provide extra education after school. For gifted kids, usually their lack of social skills will keep them from suceeding not a year or two they wasted in unchallenging school. I should know since I myself skiped three grades and had the honor of working with many who can claim that they were in top 0.1% of their classes. This posting won't win any popularity contest but if it can save one child, it would be worth it.

Answer 10

If anything I think it would affect her socially, since she might lose her early elementary school friends and enter high school feeling a little bit alone. As long as you make an effort to keep her involved in things with other kids, it probably should work out.