why does my aunt defend the people who do mager damage to the family?

Question

she sugar coats it and makes exuses. and when i tell her the truth about that person she snaps. and now she says iam jealous of her relationship with her and my cousin whos not her daughter and thats why she says iam depress. anyways she said didnt i get even already by not being there for my cousin i said no she needs to clear my brothers name when everyone knows she was lieing about him. anyways my aunt thinks she shouldnt clear his name because its not nessary when its not brung up. i told her i hate my cousin for what she did. and now the family wants her back in the family parties will thell never see me again i rather be depress and be alone

Answer 1

Well honey, what exactly are you depressed about? I mean is the depression from something outside of your aunt's actions?

How old is your aunt? If she's a bit older, then maybe she is just getting to an age where she feels her way is the right way and the only right way, ya know? Other than that, maybe she just wants to keep the peace. The other side to that is maybe she has something to hide.

I wouldn't waste time arguing w/ her about the whole situation. You already know how she will react when you bring it up, especially if you are blaming your cousin. Don't let her win that victory over you. When I say that, I mean don't stop going to family functions just b/c she's there. If you're right, and you know you're right, then good, but don't throw it in her face b/c it'll just turn into a big deal and more than likely, you'll be the one that the family tries to blame. It's your family too. You want your brother's name to be cleared. That comes down to a moral decision. If your cousin knows the truth and/or your aunt knows the truth, but they won't do anything about, that's something that they'll have to deal w/ internally. You know you're doing the right thing. Try not to stress it so much. You have every right to be upset and unhappy w/ her actions as well as the rest of your family, but at the same time, you do not want this incident to consume you. Find something else to do when she's around. The truth will come to light, trust me.