Do you pray to the Baby Jesus, or the Teenage Jesus, or the Bearded Jesus?

Question

"Dear 8lb 6 oz, tiny infant Jesus, wrapped up in you golden fleece diapers, watchin your, Baby Einstien developmental videos,"

I like to picture my Jesus in a tuxedo t-shirt. It says, I wanna be formal, but I also wanna party, Cause I like to party, so I like my Jesus to party.

I like to picture my Jesus as a Ninja, Fighting off evil Sameris.

I like to picture Jesus with giant Eagles wings, singing lead vocals to Lynyrd Skynyrd, And I'm in the front row, and I'm hammered drunk.

Answer 1

When Will Ferrell as Ricky Bobby was doing that line, I was out of my mind laughing. Damn funny.

Answer 2

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
Do you pray to the Baby Jesus, or the Teenage Jesus, or the Bearded Jesus?
"Dear 8lb 6 oz, tiny infant Jesus, wrapped up in you golden fleece diapers, watchin your, Baby Einstien developmental videos,"

Answer 3

I pray and thank Jesus who, is in the Spirtual Realm at this time. I look forward to seeing Jesus in person one day! I also see him through the Holy Spirit even now. He came as a baby into this world, died for all of our sins and now soon we all, will see Jesus again. This his Father promises in the Bible.Jesus will break through the Eastern Skies and every eye shall see him, even those that pierced him. Thank you and May You see Jesus also since it will be a great day for all of his people that endure till the end. May the Father, Son, and The Holy spirit move within you soon. Thank You!

Answer 4

Will Ferrell Baby Jesus

Answer 5

Baby Jesus Rocks!

Answer 6

I pray to all 3 cause they are all the same One in question, Jesus

Answer 7

When I pray Jesus, and think of Jesus, I always picture him as an adult. Probably not far from his final months on Earth.

Answer 8

the bearded baby Jesus

Answer 9

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I applaud you, MJ, for not being sucked in to the dogma they attempted to drench into your forming mind. I'm like you. The obvious false god/s they worship caused me to think I was an Atheist too, but it was actually just their concept that is all wrong. Everyone was worshiping a superstitious imaginary friend. they were praying to a man, they were bowing down before stones and pieces of wood carved into the images of various saints and a tortured man they called a god, and pretended a young virgin teenage girl was raped by a god that cuckolded her when she was marrying Joseph. they were wearing a murder mechanism , a torture device, around their necks as a sick and twisted symbol ! And worse, as if that isn't bad enough, they were gullible enough to confuse G-d the creator was actually Zeus, who decided to torture the son of his rape victim, Mary, who was nothing more than a vessel to hatch his non-human sperm from, who grew into "Hay-Zeus," or Jesus. Worse, this god they believe in declared that allowing this poor young girl he raped (Mary)'s son was his son so he somehow had the right to manipulate the Roman's into torturing him to death when, as an all -powerful god, and he had all the power to stop it ! And somehow the confused people in the churches with their mixed up spaghetti brains construe that because this god raped this poor virgin girl without her consent and influenced Romans to torture him and blame it on his own people so they could persecute them down through the ages, it all somehow proves god is a kind and merciful god. Should we cry out loud or laugh out loud? Pretty dang ridiculous when one stops and thinks about it with a clear and unbiased mind. It is quite difficult to understand how so many millions of people people swallow this simply by having the stories pounded into their brains since infancy. Now for the answer to your question: well, people can hypnotize themselves when they have been convinced of a thing by hearing it repeated so many times along with chants and songs. If you tell someone they have cancer they will develop it . The mind is a very powerful organ indeed! "The virgin Mary had a baby boy... " say it 10,000 times to some poor gullible person who is lost, lonely, and suggestible and the next thing you'll have them bleeding from their hands, having seizures, begging to be nailed to the cross themselves and getting up in front of congregations telling the world that those who believe this get to dance on clouds after death with all their dead relatives although they can see with their own eyes when they ride on an airplane no one is sitting on those clouds and there are no naked little cherubs or harp and trumpet music up there. You can even exhume the dead body and prove it's still there and they'll tell you the spirit is up on the clouds but its some sort of invisible process. Actually, there is an electrical charge running in a living body that stops when the heart stops beating, much like the engine of a car that allows the car to be a vehicle, the body is a vehicle for an energy or soul that 'lives' as long as the body pumps and the brain (computer box) functions. Its scientifically sound. An energy that is connected to a soul... well, some don't believe in souls. I do. I am into science and am totally convinced he soul is the part of us that is a little piece of the true and real creator of the Universe G-d within us. And that is how we are created in the 'image' of G-d who has no image, in fact the first commandment commands us not to have an image because one can not know the true G-d with an image in their mind, like some sort of Santa Claus at the top of the world with a long white beard who 'knows when you are sleeping, knows when you're awake, knows when you've been good or bad so be good for goodness sake.' Positive thought, or prayer, is very much like magic. It is creating with thought and that is what the true creator G-d did to create the universe, scientifically speaking. Certain aspects of religion are based on concepts that do work, like using the power of thought to control events. However, their concept of a superstitious human image cripples their ability to understand the true G-d who has no body and exists on all planes, on all Parallel universes, in timeless infinite space and time. The first commandment is broken by all Christians which says Thou shalt not have any image of God or any gods before Me. They are blinded when they break that commandment. They share a false concept of G-d. Furthermore, the true creator G-d is not all merciful and doesn't really care if we are happy. G-d has It's own agenda. Although lots of people praying, or thinking of a specific thing at the same time can, through the power of thought, prayer can indeed create a reality, the power of prayer does work even if they pray to an image of Mickey mouse it will work. IT is the power of thought though, not the mickey mouse they use like a mantra, that works. So any religion can bring results even if it is false. In martial arts we sometimes imagine a rope we pull ourselves up with that isn't there and it works! We imagine a light or fire in our center that feeds us with superhuman power and that works. It is the mind that does this. I hope this answers your questions, M.J.

Answer 10

The Fetal Jesus.