I started dating my ex-fiancee a month ago after 4 years apart. Things had been going well up until this weekend. He asked me on Fri. to go camping with him for the weekend. I went on line to search for a campground, then he called and reserved a site. He called me 5 different times from work to talk about all the fun stuff we were gonna do. By 5:30 on Fri., all of the sudden he realized he "couldn't afford to go camping" because he's in the middle of moving. I was disappointed, but I understood. He came over Fri. night, and we talked about some other things to do this weekend because he kept saying "I still want us to do something together". That night he woke me up at 3:30 am saying he had to go home and take some migraine medication and basically he's blown me off ever since! He didn't even call Saturday and when I called him he was sitting in a bar with his buddy (he said they had just moved some stuff)! Haven't heard from him at all today. What do you think is going on?
2007-05-27 10:23:13 · 8 answers · asked by AGT 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I should add that he's the one who sought me out after four years of not seeing each other, so it's not like I was pursuing him, he came knocking on my door. I didn't even let him in, just said a few sentences standing in my doorway. After I shut the door, he stuck a note with his number on it in the screen door. I called a few days later, and we've been dating since. For 3 out of the 4 years he was with someone else (they split up in November), and although she moved to another town, it's only 25 miles away and it's both of us' home town. (I ran out of room when asking my original question so I couldn't put all this in, and just noticed that I could add "details" to my question!) Anyway, I'm thinking that the reason he canceled the trip, got up in middle of the night, etc., is because she's called him and he's seeing her too. I think he doesn't want to come right out and tell me the truth because he wants to make sure that things are gonna work with her before he ends it with me.
2007-05-27 10:57:09 · update #1
The only way you will know what is really going on is to just point blank ask him, "what's going on? you are kind of sending out mixed signals..."
One minute he is planning and the next minute he is pulling away.
I have tried to get back with a long term relationship after a several years. It is important to remember that you are starting over and not just picking up where you left off. The two of you are different people than you were four years ago and it is going to take time working back into each other's lives. Maybe looking at it like it is a brand new relationship will help to understand what is going on. He is trying to find out his boundaries.
Guys are not mind readers so tell him about your concerns. But the whole getting up in the middle of the night thing is very strange...
2007-05-27 10:35:53 · answer #1 · answered by skittle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be cautious, it does sounds kind of strange. I suppose it depends on how much you trust him. I mean he could have bought his buddy a drink for helping him move. The next time you talk to him, see if he says anything. If he doesn't call you in the next day or two, I would be concerned and ask him.
2007-05-27 17:29:00 · answer #2 · answered by hkg0285 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be wise there is a lot that he may not be saying.How could you be all worked up and make reservation and then kinda quit on you.Wake up and smell the roses he looks like he is out to have a good time with you. Don't think with your feelings think this time with the facts of your head.Wake up you are asleep
2007-05-27 17:31:27 · answer #3 · answered by angelie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds to me that hes on medication, maby he just forgot sence hes in the middle of moving and all, maby you should go to the movies together before he goes, or out to eat, ok, soo dont feal left out if hes spending time with hes buddys, that probably the last time hes gonna see them anyway, is all about you, soo make the best of it! ok, awesome! ^^
2007-05-27 17:31:05 · answer #4 · answered by kitty~princess 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did the two of you have sex Friday night? If so, and he got what he was after, he was not interested then. You need to dump this guy!
2007-05-27 17:34:04 · answer #5 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hon, I think you should just move on ! He sounds like you can do better.You deserve an honest man of his word !
2007-05-27 17:37:23 · answer #6 · answered by lonewolf 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he might be cheating on you. Its just the signs. Confront him on it that is the best way. Or even better talk to one of his friends.
2007-05-27 17:28:11 · answer #7 · answered by amlong34 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it doesn't really matter what is going on, that is really erratic behavior you should just forget about him at least until he straightens out.
2007-05-27 17:33:26 · answer #8 · answered by justine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋