Thinking about death a lot. Not suicidal.?

Question

It happens mostly at night when I'm in bed in silence. I start thinking about time and how its limited and one day ill grow old and my parents will pass away maybe my friends and brother will by an accident or something. I guess its more of a concern about being alone and losing all those I love and not being able to take care of myself anymore in old age. I am 23 and when I was a kid this line of thought used to terrify me. I'd cry in bed and run to my parents telling them I didn't want them to die. I still worry though as you can see also about what will happen after I die because I'm uncertain about my religion but I do believe in God but I sometimes think that's not enough to get me in heaven if it exists. I don't go to church. Is this normal thinking on a regular basis? Why is only happening at night? Thanks.

Answer 1

I'm glad to know I'm not alone.........................I could have not described myself any better. I have found out I can't do a thing about it, not one thing. So I just try to look at everything as a gift and embrace it before it is gone. I try to smile instead of stare in deep thought. I think it is the state of the world today that has a lot of us severely depressed. I don't think of suicide. I love life and would never have the guts to do something like that. I wouldn't do that to my kids!!!!!!!!!!! I spend a lot of time thinking what I would do if we were invaded or if we had to survive with no electricity, cars, fresh running water or life sustaining medications. I spend a lot of time planning and imagining what I would have to do to survive. It is scary!!!!!!!!!!!! But all you can do right now right this moment is tell everybody in your life you love them, spend time with your family, try to help anybody that you can. Do the things you want to in life, don't let opportunities go buy anymore. Just embrace everything, be happy about what we do have there are so many that don't. Be glad that we had the opportunity to even exist I mean we wouldn't be here if we weren't meant to be... It just can't all be in vain... .....This song best describes the attitude we need to embed in our brains . When you listen to it, listen at the positivity not the dying part. It always makes me feel better............
Tim McGraw......
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xSGLZd9Vg4

Answer 2

I graduated two years ago with a double major in nursing and psychology, but putting all professional thoughts aside I will tell you, after my grandmother past away three months ago, who I was very close to, I began to have thoughts about dieing and how everyone dies. The reason it's happening at night, professionaly speaking is because it is proven you do most of your unconscious thinking at night while waiting to fall asleep. Some peoples minds race with so many thoughts at night it keeps them awake. It doesn't matter was religion, if any, you are, it may give you comfort when people pass away but subconsciously it still is in the back of your mind that everyone you know and you will eventually die. If you get trapped in these thoughts you will not have time nor energy to live. If these thoughts continue, usually talking to someone you trust, say your mom or dad or brothers, will keep it off your mind and they will probably agree that they have those thoughts too. It's natural, don't worry!

Answer 3

You're definitely not alone. When I was a kid I was really scared of death too. I had a series of dreams about an infinitely deep hole that was slowly but inexorably sucking me in. Creepy stuff.

I think it happens at night because that's when you're alone with your thoughts. It's dark, you're doing nothing but lying there looking at the dark walls or the insides of your eyelids. So of course your greatest concerns are going to come bubbling up. There's nothing to distract you from them. It's the same reason why kids have trouble sleeping the night before Christmas.

All I can say is, trust that you will come to your own decisions about death and the afterlife. You will. If it's really bothering you, don't hesitate to see a therapist about it. It doesn't mean you're weird, it just means that you have something you need help with; everyone needs help time and again.

Answer 4

You are young...really. I am a senior citizen who used to be afraid of death...not wanting to die. At that time, I believed death was the end of everything...that I wouldn't exist anymore. I am much older now, still enjoy life as when I was a teen-ager. You don't really get old in spirit...your body just begins to wear out. Along with that, for me, you become more accepting of the fact that everyone is mortal. I am now not afraid to die...of course I have had some spiritual experiences to help with that. I have had an out of body experience...where during surgery my spirit left my body, went up to the ceiling where I hovered & watched. I could see my body on the surgery table, see the doc & the nurse. And then I was back in my body (don't remember going back...just did). Now I know, beyond doubt that I live when I die...it is not the end...just a different life...without your body...truly. I have been fortunate enough to have had other spiritual experiences...which I have no time to share here. The end result is...even though I am not anxious to die, I know it is inevitable & I must accept it...knowing that to my folks I will be 'dead'...that is no longer in my physical body. I will be in my spiritual body unseen by those who knew me. I think as we grow older we are prepared for this & do not dread it so much if at all. Enjoy your life now...put the thoughts of death aside for now...& know that when you do die physically, you will still be alive spiritually.

May God bless you & give you peace in this matter. Nala

PS...If you need counseling in this matter, do not hesitate to get if...but I suggest you get someone who is spiritually oriented (not necessarily religious...but definitely spiritual).

Answer 5

It's called "thantophobia"--the fear of death and i have it. it's more about fearing that the most important people in your life are going to die before you do. and it happens at night because that's the time you get to fantasize. fantasies take two forms: the sexual and the macabre. the latter makes us cry. you're actually terrified about the unknown...but we can never know about that. we can only know ourselves. i think the best way to look for an answer is nature--it grows, dies, rebuilds itself. it's not even if heaven exists. i think in every afterlife (regardless of religion) it's more like the greek elisian fields than anything. everyone you've ever loved is there. waiting for you. regardless of how you've lived in your life. they are there for you.

Answer 6

I do this too sometimes. At night, there's nothing to distract you from unpleasant thoughts and fears. It will probably help to talk to your folks about it, or intentionally try to think about something else. All the things you mentioned, I worry about them too ... and now I've lost a husband and my mother, I have to help take care of my elderly dad, and I wonder if I'll be a burden to my kids in my old age. I can work myself up into a crying fit worrying about something bad happening to my kids, and then I feel silly and stop thinking about it. There's never a lack of things to worry and feel bad about! But if it's causing you to much stress and loss of sleep, talk to your family doctor.

Answer 7

it happens at night because when you lay there you think about stuff in the dark.. could be from the past when you where a kid.. you still do it ...and i hate to say this but yes.. you have a death sentance.. like all of us born.. death is a sure thing. one dya we are here ..the next we are gone,, i seen death first hand and i worry about it also because im not ready yet to die ..i dont think anybody realy is.. but i realize that in this one life ..you must make the best out of it.. because life is to short

Answer 8

I think these questions are something that everyone has to face sooner or later. I believe they happen at night because you are generally tireder then, and your mental defenses are not as strong. If you feel that you are overly worried about such things (by your own definition, not by someone else's), then I would suggest that you seek counseling. While it's perfectly normal to wonder about them, I think it's important to realize when worry starts to become obsession, and talk them out with someone who can help you make sense of them.

Good luck.

Answer 9

you are so not alone here.

i used to do that when i was a little girl. it went dormant and reawakened when i was about 13.

i went through that phase, too. in fact, i think mine was worse, because it leaked over into my schoolwork (passing death-related stories and essays) and my attitude (i was a step away from being the walking technical definition of a goth.).

i'm fine now, but i still think of those things from time to time. i think it's relatively normal. there are things that scare people deep down inside and i think we are those people who are scared of loss.

actually, religion doesn't help. faith does. being catholic, protestant, anglican, or whatever doesn't help, but truly believing in your religious beliefs does.

why don't you try visiting your church? you can talk to the people there (like the priest or pastor). get involved. know more and you might your answers. reaffirm your faith. believe me, it helps.

Answer 10

Go to church to confirm your faith in God. Then you won`t worry any more. I`m not afraid of death , but would like to see my daughter get married and have a family before I go.