My husband and I have been invited to a joint graduation party for two cousins tomorrow. Their mothers are sisters.
Cousin #1 is the daughter of a woman we both grew up with and who was our maid of honor. Her father is deceased. We lived away from the area most of her life, but we saw her and her mother nearly every time we came home to visit and have seen them quite often since we moved back home. She became friends with our daughter.
Cousin #2 is a young man we have met maybe one time. His mother is several years older than us. While we have known her as long as we've known Cousin #1's mother, we have never been close to her and haven't seen her in years. Both of his parents are alive.
We are giving cash to each of them for graduation presents. Should we give the same amount to both, or can we give Cousin #1 more?
Thanks!
2007-05-26 15:28:45 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Give Cousin #1 her gift in private, since you have a closer connection to her. Then give Cousin #2 his gift during the party and say congratulations.
If you think it is going to cause drama, I would just give them equal gifts.
2007-05-26 16:08:50 · answer #1 · answered by TwinkaTee 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For the party, give the same amount, or comparable gifts to each one. Since everyone is related, they will talk. Better to be fair, than have hurt feelings.
Allow Mom and Dad and the really close family do what they will to support the grad, they don't have to be fair..
I hate group parties. I know people do it so the relative that is away, and is hardly known cashes in on the guilt presents. Cake and punch just isn't that expensive, more than one party could be held. If I were the grad, I'd feel slighted, not getting my own party.
I am proud of my best friend's daughter. The birthdays of her son and her daughter are just weeks apart, the son is 2, the daughter in school. she has separate parties, so each child is recognized as an individual, worthy of his/her own party.
2007-05-26 19:00:13 · answer #2 · answered by riversconfluence 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say to give the same amount to both considering that it is a joint party. If cousin #2 finds out that cousin #1 received more money it could cause problems and be a potential embarrassment to you.
2007-05-26 15:34:12 · answer #3 · answered by krp 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give the one to whom you are close to more money. I am sure the other cousin doesn't even expect a gift from you. He will be surprised and pleased about any amount.
I hate joint parties, don't you?
2007-05-26 18:09:11 · answer #4 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cousins never compare give what you want to give to each most graduation parties are informal anyway its not like birthday party where they are going to open it in front of everyone you just give it to them when you get there and give them a hug and say congradulations after that you never here of the gift again
2007-05-26 15:34:09 · answer #5 · answered by maddie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you can give Cousin #1 more. They shouldn't be comparing the amounts anyways. Even if they do, they should know their relationship with you.
2007-05-26 22:09:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give equal gifts at the party. Then, if you want to give more to cousin #1 give it later, maybe add to her college fund.
2007-05-26 15:34:30 · answer #7 · answered by Jewlgrl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋