If I end up forgiving Mum(which would be a miracle) and not speek to her again, would God condem me? Because my mother plays games, and her and I do not see eye to eye on anything. I am sick and tired of all the fights with her. I have made it clear she is not to come around to my place again. I think she gets the hint, for now. If she comes around here again, and fights break out I will end up getting a restraining order on her. I know this should not happen but chrisians it does. I would rather not speak to my mother agian thn fight with her, as not fighting with her will make God happy.Are you dudes in the same short of situation? I can forgive her right?, but do not have to see her again. What situation are you in right now?
2007-05-26 00:07:45 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
There is nothing in the Bible that says you have to forgive someone and then still have a relationship with them. We are supposed to love everyone, and maybe one day you can get to a point with your mother where you both understand each other and can get along, but that day may not be any time soon. I think what you should do is let her know that you forgive her, but that you can't really maintain any kind of relationship right now.
HOWEVER, I would never, ever, ever cut someone off completely, because you never know what's going to happen. Hope everything works out for you.
2007-05-26 00:11:52 · answer #1 · answered by J B 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can forgive a person for the wrong done to you while at the same time not permit them to continue doing harm. You can stay away from your mother if she is a negative force in your life. I love my mother dearly but we do not get along, she if very controlling, judgmental and harsh. I simply stay away. I go see her every now and then because she is my mother but I do not stay long and I do not talk about anything going on with me. While I live a simple, quiet life, I still do not want her telling me what to do or being mean to me or my child.
I don't think I would consider myself a Christian but that is my take on the situation.
2007-05-26 07:18:05 · answer #2 · answered by MI 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem I am having with people quoting the commandment of honoring your mother and father is...well, what if your parent is psycho? I mean, if Ted bundy had had children, should they have honored him? C'mon get real.
Anyway, to answer your question. Some things are forgiveable and some things are not. I am going to presume your mum did one of the forgiveable ones. So, yes you can forgive her, but it does sound like you need some time apart to attempt, if possible, to put the event causing the conflict into perspective.
Good luck.
2007-05-26 07:48:42 · answer #3 · answered by quntmphys238 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it disturbs your conscience and you carry this baggage around with you, you are suffering unneedlessly. There is no right or wrong. Your mother is your mother-end of story. And you are you. End of story. Stop bringing up the disturbing images of your relation with your Mum. How would Jesus handle it, or anyone who closely follows the Bible?
You might need to study the Bible more. You need to learn to accept your Mum and not take things personally. Be impeccable with your words. Be compassionate. Try to put yourself in her shoes. You are her child, you know. Just let go of all the dillusion and your reasons for making her wrong. Just don't fight back. It is not that important, not enough to stress your life out with. Try to meditate, too.
2007-05-26 07:21:29 · answer #4 · answered by Michael S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think God is going to comden you for advoiding fights.
The bible says to respect your parents, so you should not fight with her and yes you should forgive her but true forgiveness comes from the heart so you need to find pice in your heart and rather you are right or wrong i would talk to her one more time and tell her you refuse to fight with her any more because fighting with someone you love hurts and tell her you forgive her and ask for her forgiveness, rather she dose or not is not the matter, Its the point that you ask. even if you feel you were right, you could have been wrong in some of it. so true forgiveness is not only you forgiving but to also ask for forgiveness, If you cant call her and talk reasonable write her a letter so ther can't be any arugueing. if you talk to her at the beginning tell her please just liston don't fight , just say I forgive you and I want you to forgive me, but if untill we can talk with love and not fight, we need to not stay in contact, and tell her i'm am changing Now when you are sencer and willing to change and talk to me with love and without fighting we will talk again. Untill then I forgive you and love you, and out of respect and love I refuse to fight with you again.
Rather this is in a note or a phone call if you tell her this you gave everything you could and humbled yourself, maybe some day those words will touch her heart and the next time she dose contact you it will be with a differant aproch, and out of love. keep in mind she can change and if and when she contacts you again, give her a chance and welcome her with loveing words, if your not willing to give her another chance then you never really forgave her. that will be your heart that needs serching.
God gives us many chances and forgives time and time again and he will forgive us as we forgive others.
Spell check is not working, forgive any misspelled words!
2007-05-26 07:59:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are wrong in that way. You are not supposed to fight with your mother because you owe your life from her. Have you forgotten her hardship for bringing you up? From the day you were born up to the present?
It is prohibited by God to fight with your mother and father. So ask forgiveness from your mother.
jtm
2007-05-26 07:24:53 · answer #6 · answered by Jesus M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in a worse situation than you. My mom's physically and verbally abusive towards the whole family and it frustrates me terribly when she stubbornly refuses to seek counselling.
I stopped talking to her when I was at the end of my wits and patience. But I thought about what'll happen the day she dies. She won't be the one living with the guilt of hating others. I will, and I'd hate to have that emotional baggage the rest of my life if I'd to bear my lifelong grudge against her.
God isn't here to judge me or seize any opportunity to punish me. I've come to realise that if I love God, I'd be willing to forgive my mom eventually.
2007-05-26 07:23:32 · answer #7 · answered by citrusy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hate the actions, love and forgive the person your Mum. Once you forgive there is nothing that says you have to keep being abused by her. If you forgive her, and say that it is a toxic relationship that's OK in Gods eyes.
2007-05-26 07:14:42 · answer #8 · answered by Robert S 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Jesus did say you should turn the other cheek but do not be a doormat. If she is hurting you tell her the truth. O and do make sure that the fault is not on your side before you take her on as Jesus said to take the log out of your own eye before you remove the splinter from your brothers eye. Pray and ask God to reveal to you and to softhen both of your hearts.God Bless
2007-05-26 07:13:37 · answer #9 · answered by channiek 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not forgiving her would be the worst thing you could do. It doesn't mean that you have to be a fool, though. I think that not only should you forgive her, but you should pray that if YOU are the one who needs to change, that God will reveal it to you. On the other hand, if your mother is the one who needs to change, pray that God will soften her heart so that she does.
I wish you the best of luck!
2007-05-26 07:13:23 · answer #10 · answered by The_Cricket: Thinking Pink! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋