How do you react when you get the "it's not you...it's me" speech?

Question

It absolutely drives me i nsane. I'd rather hear "youre a crazy ***** and i'm leaving you because i hate you" than that.

Answer 1

Well... the only way to deal with that is to just let him go on about his business... don't waste your time trying to figure what he is talking about. That honestly just sounds like a line used to take the cowardly way out of a relationship and it is sad. Some men are just not man enough to be honest and speak what is really on their minds and so they just use the next best thing... a "cop out"... whenever you hear that line... just laugh and send them on their way because you will already know that you are not dealing with a real man! Good Luck!!!

Answer 2

when it happened to me i just accepted it. me and that person just werent meant to be. of course i didnt like it but i respect the fact that the person could sit me down and keep the situation mature. the reason you would rather hear someone say something disrespectful to you instead is so you can have a reason to snap out. all that aint called for. why would you want someone to call you a *****? you cant be mad cause they not feeling you. at least if they give you that speech they are being more respectful and also trying to give you a hint that just cause they not feeling you now doesnt mean they wont at another time.

Answer 3

Well it's the truth.Still aggravating none the least. Normally they are saying that because there is something about you they don't like even though you could be the sweatest thing. So in turn they feel bad for not liking you,so they say it's not you, it's me. Which it is,, some people don't want a sweet guy or girl. And they don't understand it themselves. Leaves no room for argument that way also.

Answer 4

Once I got the "It's not you...it's not me...it's us" speech which told me nothing--this was not after a week or month, but over 2 years and it had nothing to do with her meeting another guy which she hadn't.

I eventually found out what the issue was. She had been trying to change me since we met and finally got tired of trying. It was my first experience in my realization that many woman are border-line neurotic.

Answer 5

Sometimes it really isn't you. He might have fallen out of love with you and there's nothing you could do about it. Although you may feel like it really is because you're a crazy *****, it might not be.

Answer 6

Maybe you got the speach because it wasnt anything you did wrong, but the fact that you just didnt do it for him, so therefore it wasnt your fault, he just didnt feel the attraction to you as you did to him. But if it makes you feel better, ask him to tell you your a stupid a** and he hates you. He was trying to break up with you without being a total dick.

Answer 7

Don't be so hard on him, he is just trying to spare your feelings. It will hurt but you will get over it. Don't dwell on it wondering why, etc. Move on and be happy, the best revenge. Someday when it doesn't matter to you you can ask him why, but wait until you have no feelings left for him.

Answer 8

I've given the speech. It doesn't work. It's never true. What it really means is that "you are not the right person for me, and I blame myself for not seeing it sooner". yeah.

Answer 9

i would say "hell yeah it's you freakin' bast@rd!!!"
and then i'd say "don't gimme that bullsh*t, just say whatever you must say and go scr3w yourself!!"

don't try to find out the real reason, it's not worth the effort and he's a freakin' chicken to tell the truth, cause he got no balls!

Answer 10

Tell them "Thank God youre going then. I dont want to be with someone that cant tell me the truth." Be sure to give them the bird also.