how do i handle drunk mom?

Question

im 19. my dad works night shift so its just me and mom, and she was on the phone with my grandmother, and she just drank like a fish.

she insisted going to the store and buying cigarettes... but i certainly wasnt gunna let her drive, so i told her i would take her, but im not lettin her drive and im not going in.

long story short... she refused. she fell on her face and pretty much broke her nose, she fell on her *** and basically bruised her tailbone, she has scrapes and bruises because she stumbled the quarter of a mile to the store and back. I followed her in the car the entire way and she refused to get in the car. I would get out of the car to help her up, and she'd hit me and refuse... so i just put on my 4-ways and followed her home.

ive managed to get her into bed now, but shes really embarassed herself and me. she yelled and screamed really hurtful things for the past 2-3 hours... and now shes finally asleep.

she isnt often like this..

but how do i deal with it?

i am only 19... im home for the summer.

i dont really have anywhere else to go. thats why its so hard.

she isnt like this often.. this is like the 3rd time in my whole life ive seen her drunk... but this is the worst time because she was so violent

Answer 1

Bless your heart - I am so sorry you witnessed your own mom like this. I have a brother who drinks and acts the same way - like a total idiot.

Borrow a camcorder and videotape her during one of her drunk escapades - then show it to her when she's sober.

Most drunks refuse to admit how evil they become when they drink - they deny it and make light of it. But if you can replay a video of them throwing f-bombs and other foul language, weaving or falling down, etc., then you can show them what you have to endure when they're like that.

You are one terrific kid to keep her safe and watch our for her during her drunk binges. Just know the problem is NOT you - it's her.

Answer 2

I would say that you could have an intervention, and if that doesn't work, then I would say that you might have to just walk away. I know that sounds harsh, but some times that's the only thing that you can do.
I have lived with a parent that drinks, and I had to walk away. I tried to tell her what I felt about her drinking, but that just didn't work. It took a few years, but she Finlay did stop drinking, and the last few years of her life we had a much better relationship.
You have to remember that you are not the one that makes her drink, and you a line can't make her stop. You have to take care of yourself, and then you are going to be able to help others.
I also have a Friend that drinks, and I still know that I can't do it myself, and so I will say that I am here for you, if you would like to talk, and to get anything off your chest that you need to, and I know that there is a lot that you would like to say, I have been there, and you will not be saying anything that I haven't wanted to say, or have already said.
Take care, and know that you are not in this alone. I will be here if you want to write.

Debbie

Answer 3

There is not a lot you can do to make your mom stop. As mentioned earlier, talk to you mom when she is sober. Try to find out if this happens often. She may get defensive. If you are home for the summer, you will know soon enough if your mom has a drinking problem or if it was an isolated incident. You may also talk to your dad and see if he thinks there is a problem.

If you think she has a problem, find a local ALANON or ALATEEN group in your phone book. Call and talk to someone and go to a meeting. These groups offer help for families and children of alcoholics. They will hep you to know what you can do to help you mom and yourself.

The best thing you can do for a violent drunk is to leave them alone. Hide the car keys and lock yourself in your room. If she hurts you call for help.

YOU ARE NOT responsible for your mom's behavior! But, you do have a choice in how it affects you.

Good luck to you and be blessed.

Answer 4

Well, you prob cant handle her cuz people who drink just dont want to hear it....but you can deal with it. Unfortunately, youre not gonna be able to say anything to her during the drinking cuz its useless, but once she has sobered up, maybe try talking with her and telling her how much of a fool she made of herself, as well as how embarrasing it was for you and your friends. Doesnt she wonder later where the injuries came from or how she got them? You should also talk with your dad and if necessary, make her see a therapist or something. Drinking to that extreme even once is not only dangerous to herself, but will eventually destroy the family. Please try talking with her and lettng her know how shes hurting you. Hopefully, shell come to her senses. Best of luck to you and Im sorry that you have to come home to such a situation. You must let her know that if it continues, your visits home will have to cease until she gets help. You are way too young to assume babysitting duties for your adult mom, and having to worrry about such things.

Answer 5

Did she recently start drinking? If so, when she's sober, try talking to her. Talk about your feelings and the fact that her drinking is affecting not only her but you also. If that doesn't work, talk to your grandmother about it if possible. Let her know what's going on and she if your grandmother can talk to her for you. If she's an alcoholic, then my heart goes out to you as a daughter of an alcoholic father. I just ignore him as much as possible, as hard as that sounds. He recently went to the emergency b/c he fell on his face across town and was brought there by the ambulance. I freeze my heart to him b/c he's done a lot of the same things you mentioned. Good luck.

Answer 6

tell your dad. if you think she needs to go to rehab or something, he's the one to make that happen. your mom may get angry with you, but would you rather her be mad for a bit and get better, or get worse and end up killing herself or someone else in a car wreck. alcoholism is serious, and hurtful to everyone involved. it's a little "after school special", but maybe you need to do a moderated intervention, where someone comes to your home and helps you hold it. you love your mom and care for her, and i'm sure others do too, and want to see her get well.
good luck to you, please talk to your dad. if he's not willing to help, you may need to consider finding your own place. no way should you be subjected to verbal or physical abuse, and your mom may need a tough love approach. it's so hard to do, but sometimes it's necessary.
really, truly, good luck. talk to friends and family, you are not alone. they'll help.

Answer 7

Chin up! You did no longer get addicted to it. You tried it and don't like it. you're golden! each and every teen does issues at the back of their father and mom back. discern's recover from it in jiffy and existence is going on. It took my mom a week as quickly as I was15 to getover me sneaking out to flow to a occasion. no longer that undesirable. valuable i became disappointed bc my mom became disappointed with me yet existence is going on. in basic terms don't get caught next time. . . btw, cousins tattle.

Answer 8

Geesh. That`s tough.
There's really nothing you can do. She's a grown woman, and shes going to do what she wants. You know what I mean?. What you could try doing is talking to her when she is sober and telling her how she acts when she is drunk and that is scares you or whatever. Or you could video tape her one day, and show her how she acts when she is drunk.

Answer 9

after she wakes up and felt better, tell her about what happenned and you wish that wouldnt happen again. and forgive your mom for saying hurtful and doing embarassing things last night. after all. she was drunk. drunk people cant control themselves although most of them still knows what they are doing. but its just hard to take control over your actions and muscles when you are drunk. =) good luck.

Answer 10

Try talking to her (when she's sober) about this. Try asking her why she was drinking. If she refuses to answer let her be. If it gets like that agian get her some help.