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I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and live with him for 1 year. Today while he was in the gym I picked his cell and checked is text messages inbox and sent messages, In the last 3 months alone, he went for drinks with another girls, lunch, dated, etc while I was at home or away in business trips.
Same deal when he was out of town, he was flirting and going out with several girls. I am very sure things went further than just inocent business lunch or dinner or a glass of wine with a female friend.
I just feel horrible! , when he came back I told him that I was leaving him, no show no fuzz, no nothing! I think he understood why and he said it was ok. I know he knows what is the real deal, well.... he took a shower, got dress and he is out enjoying Friday night!! Unfortunatelly I don't know much people in Charlotte - NC (none) and I don't have nothing to do but stay at home and feel horrible!! It is right to do something like that after 2 years?

2007-05-25 13:38:46 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

12 answers

Well I can tell u like this. Its going on two yrs since I've been with my girl and i was her first love. I cheated on her yea, but if i could go back in correct my mistakes i would do so. My situation is that me and my girl was having sexual incounters everyday on the reg and it was outrageous. I had to leave my city and go to another. We had went a good two months without seeing each other. The thing about us guys is that we feel like that we dont need to cheat, but we feel like that we need female attention when we are away on a trip or otherwise just b/c of the simple fact we are use to getting it from u on the reg. We dont talk to other girls intentionally it just throws us off a little when the cycle changes. Its like if u are away on ur lil business trip and u see an attractive guy who you see going into the same area u have to have your buisness meeting and he is also staying at the same hotel that ur at. U guys make eye contact and starts to converstate u tell him your situation. He just wants to be your friend. Your boy friend hasnt been picking up the phone, theirs nothing wrong with having a friend cuz i know his time is occupied. Benefit of the doubt u feel hes cheating. back to the guys we already look at females as a sex symbol which dosent mean that sex is the first thing on the mind. After getting to know things about one another and sharing the same interest your friendship becomes closer. Then on top of that u havent had none for a min the last thing u think about is cheating. But u balance that with pleasure and ur man got u addicted to him but u dont have him. But u have an attractive friend with common interest. U cheated. When guys cheat they start feeling regretful and then they think that u cheated becuz they did. So they stat seconguessing theirself then is alot just holla at me

2007-05-25 14:24:29 · answer #1 · answered by forthetopimheaded 1 · 0 1

Depending on what you like to do in Charlotte, you could go uptown, since it's warm tonight, it will be busy at the bars and clubs. And more people are out just walking around and mingling... Anyway...

Men cheat for different reasons. It depends on the man. Some cheat for love, some for the thrill, some for (you know). He could be an addict or is just "greedy" for women. Who knows? So you must talk to him and find out what he really wants in a woman or in a relationship. He may not even know himself. Or, is too embarrassed to talk about it. If that's the case, you may not ever get anywhere with him and so you may just have to let him go. Maybe you're not compatible. People will cheat for all sorts of reason. Sometimes, they'll cheat because they want out of the relationship but don't know how to tell the person they want out because they're afraid of confrontation or the person's reaction. Men (and women) will cheat for anything. Most of the time we think about the general reasons, but there are also many specific reasons. And it may not be you. It may not be the other woman is attractive. It may be him not knowing what he wants in a woman or relationship. So, he confused and is a waste of your time anyway.

You can talk to him and find out what he REALLY wants, but you may be wasting your time.

---------
You'd better think fast about what you want to do. The clubs don't stay open past 2:00AM.

2007-05-25 14:02:05 · answer #2 · answered by mo2dajizzo 5 · 1 0

dishonest fairly has extra to do with the Cheater fairly than the Cheat-ee - some egos have a hollow that they are attempting to fill- and subconsciously or consciously they experience entitled to extra interest, affection, confirmation... It has not something to do with love- this is fairly extra approximately self-loathing, and perceived desires as against completely desires. whilst adult men or women human beings cheat- they understand this is incorrect, and this is incorrect because of the fact hurting somebody else isn't solid for your self. some human beings stay in a deeper state of denial than others. they might rationalize dishonest by telling themselves that they deserve tru love or happiness- yet the two a variety of start up from interior. Love is a call- so is happiness, and you will distract your self with new human beings or reviews, yet faster or later you capture as much as your self after which you may desire to start up as quickly as extra or restoration the concern.

2016-10-13 21:51:42 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Men like a bit of a chase with a girl. He is going after the other girls for the thrill of the chase. Once you moved in with him then there was nothing left to chase and he got bored of you. I am not saying this to be mean. Just think about it and next time don't move in until you are married. I promise you it will make a difference in the relationship!

2007-05-25 13:56:07 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Trying♥ 5 · 0 0

Well - ONE reason for not investing everything in one woman is just as you've illustrated: because they may at any time go into a huff and ditch you. It's nice to have at least one other person to go to.

There are many other reasons, but you won't like those, either. Never mind - you can just sit there and feel horrible and blame it on him, even though you did the dumping.

CD

2007-05-25 13:46:14 · answer #5 · answered by Super Atheist 7 · 0 0

Get packin' girl -- you need a change of scenery. Leave town - go home - go to a friend - but ditch that miserable SO*. Get on with your life - and leave that misery in your rear view mirror!

Why do men cheat? Well, women also cheat. That doesn't make it right, but we don't always see what we should. Ditch the blinders and move on.

2007-05-25 13:41:55 · answer #6 · answered by chequamegon 4 · 0 0

Leave him.He cheats because he may be insecure of the relationship or wants to have some fun.But thats not the way to have fun when in a steady relationship,find someone else whohas the time and patience for you.Good luck

2007-05-25 13:45:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

Of the guys I know, they've said they do it for the thrill. It excites them until they get caught. Kind of like underage drinking, its fun until you get busted. Fortunately, there are guys out there that dont cheat. If I find one here in NC, I'll let you know.... Im still looking myself.

2007-05-25 13:47:01 · answer #8 · answered by Crazy Chick 1 · 0 0

I haven't dated. However I am a guy and as a guy i know how it is to be seduced by a girl, I also know the feelings of a girl when she want to start something with you. I haven't dated but it has happened to me many times. As men we are very active and when are bodies are active we tend to encounter with different emotions at once. We tend to let our selves to be guided by emotions. We as men are very emotional too although not as women are. We get emotional about other things. Know if we something we like we strive to get it. However in the case of your boyfriend that something must have come to him. LOOK WHEN MEN GET TO EMOTIONAL AND EXCITED HEY TEND TO DO THAT WHICH IS VERY ABNORMAL TO WOMEN (JUST AS MAKING THEMSELVES LOOK AS THE TOUGH MAN WHEN WANTING TO GAIN THE ATTENTION OF A YOUNG LADY). Know hormones tend to get very excited and actions just as these tend to happen. I RECOMMEND YOU FIND (AND HAVE THIS IN MIND) SOMEONE WHO IS RATHER FAITHFUL TO YOU. It's part of the process.

2007-05-25 13:52:57 · answer #9 · answered by Martin 2 · 0 1

I am sorry to hear that. But keep your head up high and look straight ahead!!! Better things are to come your way.

2007-05-25 13:49:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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