Christian Parents: Do you allow your kids to listen to secular music? If so, where do you draw the line?

Question

With our, it doesn't have anything to do with the amount of curse words, it has to do with the song's message. If I hear them listening to a song, and the song's message is something I wouldn't want them to do or say, then we tell them to turn it off.

My brother in-law, however, shields his kids from anything other than music that has it's roots in scripture or praise to God.

Still another Christian family I know of chooses to let their kids listen to whatever they want...citing that shielding your kids from things only makes them want it more.

How do you feel?

Answer 1

I am a Christian mother of six and I do not allow my children to listen to secular music here in my house. They have not rebelled thus far, now I am not naive to believe that when they are at their friends houses who are not Christians that they are not being exposed to secular music. But my kids don't prefer it over Christian music.There is alot of different kinds of Christian music out there that they can listen to. I am the one that will be held accountable for letting them listen to things that do not lift up or are not edifying to the Name of the Lord. I will not waiver when it comes to the spiritual well-being of my kids. My kids love Christian music and they don't have a problem listening to just Christian music. People have this misconception that Christian music is slow, put you to sleep kind of music. Just not the case anymore. Lots of good Christian bands out there and there is no need for me to expose them to songs that will influence them in a negative way. I have kids that range from ages 16- 4. Stop and think about it how many secular song really have a good, positive moral message? Off the top of my head I cant think of any!

There are alot of Christian families that allow the children to watch inappropriate shows as well doesnt make it right, but then again, they are the ones that will have to answer for the decisions when they are standing before Lord God Almighty.

Answer 2

I am not a christian parent well actually im not a parent but I am a christian teen personaly I listen to w/e and I believe not all christians but some have there noses a little to high if you know what I mean I no a lady who tried to shield her kids from watching pokemon because it was evil quote quote but in the end they saw it somehow anyway 1st how old are they because with music there is a age to things but basicly from my point of view I cant listen to music that has scripture 24/7 but if you feal strongly about it there are some christian bands that are good such as Thousand Foot Crutch and Flyleaf

Answer 3

My boys aren't to the age where they pick the music they want to listen to yet. However, I listen to secular music most of the time realizing that it is not a view I have to agree with but the passion behind the music is the base of it’s importance.

I knew a family who wouldn’t let their kids listen to any kind of secular music. What did those kids do? They had friends burn CDs then put a Christian title on it so the CD would be unrecognizable unless their parents actually listened to it--which rarely happened. Eventually they did rebel and trust me it was worse then a normal teenager. One of their boys is now in rehab after overdosing on a common cough medicine. Was it entirely because they didn’t let them listen to secular music? No, but I believe it was a factor.

I feel that there comes a time in an adolescents life [around 14-16 depending on maturity] where they should be able to start making some choices for themselves no matter the outcome. I’m a person who truly believes in picking and choices battles. I feel that if they want to listen to secular music--let them. If you give them a little independence then it becomes easier to parent when the big stuff comes to be a problem--sex, drugs, or violence.

We cannot dictate our young adult’s lives. We can only guide them and pray they make the right choices. Hopefully, during their upbringing they will have learned the things needed to succeed. And if they do stray hopefully they will find their way back to Him.

Answer 4

I'm not a parent, I'm only 21, but have you heard the Christian music lately, almost sounds the same as the secular music.

I don't think it's a big deal to listen to secular music because it's all in the name of fun. It's to dance and relax. If Christian parents really had confidence in their parenting they wouldnt be worried about music influencing their kids.

Plus if the kids grow up with Christian values they are for the most part not going to want to hear negative messages in songs, assuming they actually listen to the words b/c many people don't, sometimes it's for the rhythm.

I agree with the second family, plus the kids are going to hear the music at school or friends houses anyway.

Answer 5

Don’t shield them, but protect them. Educate them on the importance of scripture, and practice what you preach, but the world exists with many influences that we can’t control. Song and lyrics illustrate and evoke emotions, so content screening is important. For example, a rap song isn’t bad just because it’s rap – one song may be okay, while another may have an inappropriate message all together. It’s important to remember that ‘words have meaning.’
You can’t control all of your children’s music. If you think you can, you’re gonna learn one day that you’re wrong. But if you listen to the music your kids choose, with them, you can enjoy time together while sharing in the goodness out there, not just fighting against the godless.

Answer 6

Let your feelings be your guide. If the lyrics are in any way ungodly and/or the rhythm/beat/tone of the melody is at all troubling to your spirit, then it is best to turn it off. Staccato rhythms are especially disconcerting. Soothing soft music without lyrics is always best. It even helps babies sleep better.

Answer 7

You are depriving your children from 99% of the world's music. It makes Christianity appear to be a cult. There are scriptures with more violence and lewdness than even some of What the Rappers record. You don't withhold music. You explain it, so the child understands the meaning and intent.

Answer 8

I allowed my children to listen to whatever music they wished, read any book they chose, and rent the movies of their choice.

From the time they were three years old I made certain that I was sitting right beside them and we talked about the subject matter. I read the books they read too.

(Secretly, I was very glad when one of my sons finally decided that "Boy George" was an untalented moron).

They have grown to be well rounded, articulate, and decent adults ~~~ I'm very proud of them all and the people they picked to marry.

Answer 9

For me, it depends on the age and spiritual maturity of the kids. My oldest daughter, age nine, listens to both secular and Christian, but I draw the line at sexually explicit or violent lyrics. Most of the time I don't need to, though, because she is spiritually mature enough to say "I don't need to listen to that stuff, I'll turn it off myself." I still monitor what she is listening to, but she does a great job of monitoring herself.

Answer 10

My children are aloud to listen to christian music of all kinds, and music with no lyrics. For example jazz and classical. They are well balanced kids and do not wish to expose themselves to hearing profanity or sexual innuendos over the radio or anywhere else. My children know, and I teach them, that what ever you bring into your mind and body is reflective of the relationship and Christ-like attitude that we all should have. If Christ wouldn't listen to it, then neither should we, bottom line.