my dad. he doesnt like my boyfriend since the first day he saw my boyfriend. he reason he gave me is that he thinks that my boyfriend is a smoker and drinks a lot. (my boyfriend doesnt smoke. he drinks bt only at apecial ocassion) i explained it to him but he never sits down n listen. so, he made my boyfriend promise him that he wont see me again. in this situation. in my opinion, i think my boyfriend has no other option but to say yes to my dad. so he did. but after that, my boyfriend keep seeing me as usual. my dad knows about it and he keep on saying that my boyfriend doesnt keep his promise. how can i solve this issue between my dad and my boyfriend? how can i make my dad accept my boyfriend? i am caught between both parties that are equally important and it feels really bad. pls help. i appreciate it.
2007-05-25 04:09:17 · 8 answers · asked by colver 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I was in this same situation with my girlfriends step dad. Best advice I can give is dont bring your boyfriend around your dad. Thats what I did, I avoided my girlfriends step dad for a few years, and he learned that we were gonna be together no matter what and he just expcepted it.
2007-05-25 04:20:34 · answer #1 · answered by DTT1166 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
One of the talents people like your dad develop in growing up and becoming adults, is they have experience and the ability to read a person like a book, and can tell a good egg from a bad one.
One of the talents young adults have is thinking they know more than their parents, and making decisions based on emotion alone, and that is a guaranteed formula for failure.
Your b/f has probably also promised you he is seeing no one but you but in case he hasn't, why not ask him and see what he says?
He lied to your dad and broke his word of honor about not seeing you, so what makes you think he will not lie to you, about seeing others?
The above is just an example but he has proved he is not one to be trusted as he will tell you one thing and do something else and there are those who would refer to that as lying.
I know I will not get best answer as I am not telling you what you want to hear, but even though I do not know you, I much like your DAD have your best interest at heart.
Listen today, or pay the price tomorrow, the choice is yours and at what age will you learn that a liar is not to be trusted?
He has disrespected your Dad, now who do you think will be next???
Maybe when you find out he is seeing others behind your back, then we will be wishing we had listened to dear old Dad but of course by then, it will have been too late to keep you from being hurt and do you think maybe that was what Dad had in mind, looking our for your own good?
Thanks for the two points anyway,
Darryl S.
2007-05-25 04:44:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been in a situation exactly like this. My bf promised my dad to stay away from me but of course, we snuck around to see each other. He even snuck to my house while my parents were away at work or whatever. My dad came home one day... lets just say there is a restraining order keeping us apart right now. It's been a year and 2 months since we've been together. I miss him terribly!!!! But losing him that way was one of the worst things I've ever had to go through. So the best thing to do, even though its hard and you dont want to, listen to your dad. Wouln't you rather be able to maybe still talk randomly than to not talk at all? And since I'm still a minor I can't talk to my ex until I'm 18. I hope I helped. Good luck.
2007-05-25 04:19:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell you Dad that he put your boyfriend between a rock and a hard place. If you're boyfriend cared about you, he couldn't honor his promise to your DAd.
Attempting to respect your Dad, he made the mistake of making a promise he couldn't keep, which can be construed to be disrespectful.
Dad has to let boyfriend off the hook, or, better yet, boyfriend can talk to Dad and tell him his feelings for you are stronger than the promise he made, and he can't keep it.
Hopefully, Dad is man enough to recognize that as good character.
Take it slow, you're in a battle as old as man.
2007-05-25 04:19:31 · answer #4 · answered by KRIEGAR 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a tricky question....it very much depends on how your dad was brought up. Father will always protect their precious daughters and everyone out there...in his opinion is just not good enough for his little precious. Your boyfriend will have to just figure out how to gain his trust...and this is every important. If he is really seriously in you....he will have to win the heart of your parents too and not just you. Mainly because your parents has the best interest in you.
2007-05-25 04:21:28 · answer #5 · answered by cheribum 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
iam going threw the same thing right now as well. the only thing is my boyfriend is a drinker an he smokes pot. its hard but u know every dad is going 2 not like there daughters b/f dads are very over preterctive. but still it sucks. maby some day ur dad will come around but most likly not. dads only see the bad things not the good things. to me alls they should cair about is if there making there daughter happy.... maby just try and site down with ur dad an b/f an talk about it. good luck to you. hope ur dad comes around :D
2007-05-25 04:17:29 · answer #6 · answered by AUBRIE L 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your dad is controlling and overprotective. He will never accept ANY of your boyfriends. You won't be out of this situation until you are grown up and out of the house.
2007-05-25 04:15:06 · answer #7 · answered by Haven 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
had your dad ever liked a guy you dated??? your dad sounds too hard headed to change, but with that said you can't live your whole life with your dad deciding things for you. you need to tell your dad to be there for you when you ask and not to be there to control your personal life. im sure your dad loves you, but if he truly loves you, tell him he needs to trust your instincts and let you live.
2007-05-25 04:17:53 · answer #8 · answered by jbuck32002 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋