Religious mother in law to be problem. My religious mother in law to be is one of the most hypocritical women.

Question

I have ever met. She claims to be all religious and a good woman. But she talks ill about me and tells people she hates me. Last night I repeated a statement she made to me to a friend whichwas a statement that hurt me very much. She ( mother in law to be ) went crazy and started screaming and yelling. SHe made the statement that her family was a better family than mine because my parents are not religious and she is.

What the hell am I going to do?? I love her son, but I do not know if I can take much more of this.

Answer 1

As someone who is not religious, I can say that your mother in law is a wacko. Religious people are not supposed to be "holier than thou", judgemental, hateful, and hostile.

I would say continue to love her son, ignore every word she says, make pretend she does not exist, and her son will not let her get in the way of his love for you. The reason she says this stuff to you is becasue she knows it bothers you. Make pretend it doesn't bother you, and she'll get even madder (which is more fun to watch!). Living well is the best revenge.

Love conquers all. Don't let her ruin what you have going with your Husband.

Answer 2

I would not fight it. Terrible people are just terrible people. There is usually nothing you can do to stop them from misbehaving. Fighting against it, will just pull you into the mire and make you feel worse about it all, because deep down inside you will know you are acknowledge and giving power to the bad actions.

Treat her like an unruly child, ignore the bad behavior and reward the good by giving her praise. It will be difficult, but is your only hope of turning things around. Grin on the inside, knowing that this will make her crazy, because it will expose her as a Biach to everyone else. If you fight against her, then everyone else will just see it all as a disagreement between two unstable people.

Answer 3

Well, you are not marrying your mother-in-law. Speak to your future husband about this. He needs to to have a heart to heart with dear old mom. And just because she is "Religious" dosen't mean a hill of beans. Many people claim to be religious (by the way, Jesus didn't like religious people) but they don't adhere to the foundational truths of Christianity.They don't walk in love, forgiveness, goodness, kindness ect..

Answer 4

Oh man..... that bites...
I know a few people who have issues with their mother in law. Well I guess you could get married and then move away from them. Is that possible? If he's a mama's boy then you do truly have a problem, because that means he'll most likely take her side in any argument/problem. If this is the case - I'd scrap it all and find another love.

Answer 5

The first problem is she claims to be religious and a good woman. that was your first hint that she would not be what she claimed. when someone feels the need to tell you these things they aren't.

You can sit her down and explain to her that you won't put up with her behavoir. That you are an adult and if she can't treat you as such then you'll have to stop coming to see her or letting her come to your house. You have to remember she is not your husband. She is not in control. She is not your relationship with your husband. You may have to tell her to butt out.

Answer 6

Are you marring her? No you're getting married to her son. It is her job to accept you into her family, not the other way around. If she continues to be difficult that only thing I can suggest is to "kill" her with kindness. Be OVERLY nice to her. Always ask her if there is anything you can do to help. Give her little meaningless gifts.

I know this is the exact opposite of what you WANT to do to her, but trust me eventually she will have to give up being hateful if everything you do or say is kind.

Answer 7

I have the exact same problem, only, get this, I'm christian just like my father and mother in law! Still they really dislike me on religious grounds!!! It makes me really really sad.

What I think is this:
Try confronting her as little as possible, its hard, i know (very very hard), keep your distance and treat her as politely as you can (EVEN if she dosen't do the same thing). If she can't have a christian aproach on this subject than i'm affraid that, for the sake of your relationship you will have to. If she goes hipocrital on you, you can point the wrong things she is doing based on the same book she believes to be absolute truth. Still the key behaivior here is patience and to avoid confrontation. She dosen't like you, thats her problem. Its hard, but i trully believes its the best for your relationship

Answer 8

You called her on something, and, when confronted, she flew into a fit of anger. You have your hands full.
I do not know your background. I hope you are Christian. If not, do not let her behavior persuade you not to look for Christ.

Perhaps what you can do is find some way to get her to realize gossip is a sin, and , is not showing the love a Christian should be showing.
Sanctimony is a hard beast to kill, but it's one that has to be killed by the person themselves with God's working in their life.

Answer 9

People whom say they are very religious, usually aren't. I know that because I have seen that a lot.
If your soon-to-be-husband isn't going to do anything about it or don't believe you, is time to end it.
I love my boyfriend but his mother is acting jealous (he's only child) and possessive; she even ignored me yesterday and I was only 20 inches away from her! I told him: or me or her. I know I can't make him stop talking to her (too bad..) but at least stay in my side!!!
You should talk to your hubby about how you fell and ask him to talk to her.

Answer 10

Try to find some middle ground, maybe try not to get into any discussions with her. Try to keep your contact with her, strictly on a need to basis. Give her a wide birth and put a bubble of protection around yourself. Good luck.