Why is it so hard for people to take 5 mins out of their day..fill out the already stamped and addressed RSVP.and drop it in the mail????? But of course they are probably gonna show up with 3 extra guest..and wonder why I have a attitude!!!
2007-05-24 02:53:09 · 30 answers · asked by simply2priceless 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Hahaha, I left this task to my mother.
I think what you should do depends on a few factors: how long it has been since the RSVP date has passed, how close the date is, and how soon you need to give the final number to the caterer and other vendors.
If you have time, try to use word of mouth before actually calling people and point blank asking them yes or no. If you know Suzie talks to Bob, and you happen to talk to Bob, ask him if he knows what Suzie's plans are because she hasn't RSVP'ed. If he says he doesn't know, ask him to put a bug in her ear about either calling or dropping the card in the mail ASAP.
If time is of the essence, then I'm afraid someone will be stuck calling. If it's a large number of guests that haven't RSVP'ed, maybe divide it up between mom and bridesmaids so everyone has a few people to call? When it comes down to this stage of the planning and preparation, the bride has too much on her mind at this point to be worrying about this!
If you end up calling, reward yourself with a massage when you're done.
Good luck and congratulations!!
2007-05-24 03:03:36 · answer #1 · answered by Travis and Rachel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People can be rude.
They also may not put your wedding on as high a priority as you are.
By all means call the non-respondents. Or ask your wedding planner, mother, MIL, bridesmaids to do this. You're paying your caterer by the plate, I imagine - and you have a legitimate need to know whether they will or will not be attending - and if so, now is the time to firmly but gently remind them that seating is limited to just those on the invitation (this may or may not include children).
To those who waffle - "Well, I'm not sure," say, "We are finalizing the list on Wednesday and really have to know for sure as soon as we possibly can. If you don't mind, how about I put you down as respectfully declining?"
Hire an Au Pair for guests who "forget" and bring their charming child with them to both the ceremony and the reception.
BTW - this is one reason to hire a wedding planner - she and her staff can make these kinds of calls as a business need rather than the bride - who is already under enough stress.
2007-05-24 03:48:40 · answer #2 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've encountered this issue on two weddings and decided to call the people that did not respond. I explained that we were in the process of providing the reception hall with the number of guests so food could be ordered and prepared. Both Weddings were sit down dinners. I heard all sorts of excuses as to why they 'forgot to mail' back the RSVP's. I accepted their response on the telephone that day.
I was totally surprised at the reception when several of those that told me YES on the telephone still did show up. We had to pay for several "no show" dinners.
For your information most of the those people were relatives.
We also had a member of the wedding party that decided to invite others to the Wedding Rehearsal Dinner. We were then in a bind due to a space shortage. Her comment was that I'm in the wedding and I'll invite who I wish.
Thanks God, I no longer have unmarried kids.
2007-05-24 03:10:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Simply lose the attitude, because people not RSVPing is a part of life. People are busy, and your wedding is not the first thing on their minds--many of them won't even think about it until the day of when they look at their calandar and go "Oh no! Suzy's wedding is today!!" Then they run to the store to get a gift, take a quick shower, and race to the wedding.
Simply make some phone calls. Be polite, tell people this. "I'm sorry, but I haven't received your response to the wedding invitation, and we need to have a final head count for the caterer. Will you be attending the wedding on June 12?" You can also divide this task up, enlist your mother, future mother in law, and bridesmaids to make calls. But there's no need to be rude about it, ok? Lighten up, this is supposed to be a happy time. Remember, the wedding is 1 day, your marriage is going to be a lifetime--so keep the wedding in perspective, ok? Good luck!
2007-05-24 03:59:17 · answer #4 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I understand where you're coming from, as I am at this stage of wedding planning myself. If your date for responses has passed, then by all means call the people who have not responded (or get a relative or a friend to help you with this task). You can just say you need a final head count for the caterer (which is usually true), and then you will know whether or not they are planning to come, and if so, how many.
2007-05-24 02:58:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's crazy isn't it, I can understand if you don't include an RSVP card that has already been stamped, but really you've taken the hard work away from them and they still don't reply. I'd definitely give them a call and say you need to know final numbers to advise the caterer, keep it calm and pleasant!!
2007-05-24 03:57:18 · answer #6 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just one of those things that every couple goes through. Wait about 3 days after the RSVP date and then, yes, start calling. Keep it light. Hi, I hadn't gotten your RSVP and I need to finalize things with the caterer so I just need to know if you'll be able to make it.
Seriously, otherwise totally normal people seem to have a block when it comes to sending back their RSVPs. It's crazy.
2007-05-24 03:09:56 · answer #7 · answered by LB 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since you have to pay for guests if they don't show, you are within your right to ask for confirmation. Keep it on a casual and relaxed tone.. 'just working out final arrangements for catering etc, I was wondering whether you were coming to the wedding?..' Some people simply forget.. don't judge too harshly.. I'm one of them. Intentions are always there, but with kids etc I usually am so busy I simply forget.. not meaning to be rude or upset anyone.. my brain is simply so scattered and sleep deprived these days...and although your wedding is THE most important thing to YOU, it's simply 'a wedding' to others..
2007-05-24 03:04:56 · answer #8 · answered by Aussie mum 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Just call them and check your attitude beforehand. You don't know what they've had going on in their own lives, and I'm sorry, but your wedding is not each of your guests first priority, even if they are very happy for you! Call them and explain you need to get a number to the caterer...this will always happen, no need to get all upset over it!
2007-05-24 03:07:53 · answer #9 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
my wedding reception is in 2 months and i should be getting my reply cards back anyday now. i think i will agree with everyone else.... if i dont get a reply card from someone i will call them up and say whats the deal? reply cards are so you know how many ppl are there for the meal, if they dont send a relpy card back i would take it as they arnt showing up and if they do just say "oh i thought you werent coming cause you didnt send the relpy card back for the meal?" i dont know if i just said 2 things at once here but im sure i wont help in the decition makeing. lol
2007-05-24 03:07:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋