We start arguing about something and then I start touching him and I start hitting him and he hits me back,it's in the same level of hitting,he doesn't hit me more than I hit him you know it's equal.So anyways after a while we start talking again like nothing ever happened...I know it's wrong to get physical but I can't help it,I am 18 and he is 19,i am afraid of after we get married we start fighting and things could get worse than just hitting...what can I do to stop this???
2007-05-23 21:40:12 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
sorry about the grammar!!
2007-05-23 21:41:03 · update #1
my gf does that
she put me in a coma for 2 years
now i can't speak or walk.
shame really
she still hits me.
we're still together though
2007-05-23 21:45:29 · answer #1 · answered by BIG-Mike-Photography 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm in the minority on this topic. I think it's wonderful to hit each other. It shows that you are still young. I used to get annoyed when I was 21 and fighting with my girl, but as the years went along, and I met different girls, and they all hit me, I grew some balls and actually started welcoming the physicality.
While I've heard girls say, "At least he loves me enough to hit me," I must be the only guy to have ever said this.
So in conclusion, when you've gotten too old to fight, you're simply too old. So punch away. Be sure to straddle him on the couch, punch him in the balls and smack his face until he starts crying. He'll love you for the rest of his life.
2007-05-23 21:51:38 · answer #2 · answered by Bret Leduc 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, you both need to learn better skills for coping with stress. Eventually, this could evolve into something much worse. Get counseling if at all possible, but, failing that, get a book from your local library on handling stress and physical/domestic abuse.
Second, on a personal note, if you two are beating each other then the relationship is on the verge of being damaging to you both. Is it worth the stress/time/injury?
2007-05-23 21:44:33 · answer #3 · answered by seventhyearfalling 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Play fighting's one thing, but actually hitting to do harm, that's just stupid. I remember my wife slapped me once and had we not been in traffic, her head would've gone crashing through that window. I told her, "Don't EVER do that again!" and by the trembling, I'm pretty sure she got the point. Just because you're a woman doesn't mean we won't kick you in the @$$. Some of us guys don't play that crap luv. Hitting promotes nothing and is the wrong way to try to get yourself heard. Be safe.
2007-05-23 21:51:23 · answer #4 · answered by Pontius 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What happens if one of you gets hurt by accident? What happens if you get married and have children? Do you want your children to be crying because mommy and daddy are fighting?
Time to have a long discussion with your boyfriend about this. It needs to end right now. People that love each other do not hit each other. That is disrespect for each other--plain and simple!!
2007-05-23 21:46:19 · answer #5 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is good that you asked the question before marriage. You both should try to control your emotions. Hitting each other is not going to solve your problem. Instead of arguing and getting physical, you both should sit down and calmly discuss the issue that is bothering you both or any one. Of course, after marriage (and before marriage too) problems crop up, but the solution lies in showing maturity. You are not school kids, remember.
2007-05-23 21:45:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It will only get worse unless both of you decide to stop it. The way I see it it's up to you to put a stop to it. Since you are the one to hit first. Because don't expect him to stop it by not hitting you back if you hit him. I was raised with abuse and control myself not to hit. But if someone hits me. I am hitting back.
2007-05-23 21:46:23 · answer #7 · answered by Sunset 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why don't both of you enroll in martial arts classes so you'll know the right way of fighting and defending? lol seriously, martial arts may even teach you how to discipline yourselves and help you control your anger by not resorting to violence..
kidding aside, hurting each other physically is not a good sign.. maybe, aside from my first suggestion, everytime you feel like hurting each other physically try to get away from each other and cool your heads off.. when you think that you've gotten over your anger, try to work things out in a peaceful manner.. just try to avoid too heated arguments..
i hope this helps...
2007-05-23 22:03:47 · answer #8 · answered by gracee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should call it quits. it doesn't matter that you "hit each other equally". that's just crazy, and it's completely pointless for you two to remain together. Apparently, neither of you really care for the other, or you would find a way to talk about your differences, rather than physically abusing each other everytime you get mad. If you remain together, it will just get worse, not better.
2007-05-23 21:45:50 · answer #9 · answered by jeromy1998 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
well, ive already done this. It usually comes about because you all can't stand each other and never get along no matter how muc you really love each other. To make a long stor y short once this behavior starts the only way to end it is to leave each other seriously
2007-05-23 21:45:46 · answer #10 · answered by ProudToBeWhite 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Why do you feel you need to revert back to being a child and hitting? That is not grown up behavior at all.
Don't hit him and he won't hit you. Learn to discuss the issues and resolve them like adults ~ no yelling, no screaming, no throwing or breaking things, no hitting or touching at all.
And don't say you can't help it ~ we all can control how we act and react to things, you just don't want to if you use that excuse. It's called discipline and self control.
2007-05-23 21:44:31 · answer #11 · answered by KittyKat 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋