English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

I have a friend, 40 y/o single dad with a 6 y/o son, his only child. He has sole custody and gets child support from his ex-gf. She had 3 kids from other dads, but has custody of none of them; not "mom of the year". He doesn't have any college, and he was discharged dishonorably from the navy for failure to show up for duty. He just got a temp job at $14/hr (never made "two digit" hourly wage before), but he is having attendence problems, because his son frequently gets sick and he can't find a babysitter, and daycare won't take a sick kid. He was told in a meeting with his management that his son's doctor excuses don't excuse him personally from missing work, even when he explained that he was a single dad. They gave him a warning, but fired one of his co-workers the same day for attendence issues. Since he is a temp, he gets no sick/vac, but he is paid directly by the company, a union shop. He is not working through a "temp agency". How can he keep his job & care for his son?

2007-05-23 18:49:09 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Parenting

He has union dues deducted from his check, but he was told that he is not part of the union, unless he works a certain amount of days, since he is a "temp". He has worked for the company about 90 days.

2007-05-23 18:50:41 · update #1

9 answers

This is sad because we are so forgiving of single mothers and people are so willing to help them out, but if a man actually steps up, and needs a little assistance, he's a dead beat. Maybe he can get assistance from the government, he can't help it that he has a sick child. Good luck to him

2007-05-23 19:04:34 · answer #1 · answered by Chrys 5 · 1 1

He should sign up with a "temp agency" before he gets fired. If he tells them of his problems with attendance when his son is ill, they may be able to give him some suggestions. Some individuals will care for sick children, so check that out. Sometimes you need to determine how sick a child is and go from there. Not every illness merits a stay at home. He can also make sure his son is getting proper nutrition and proper rest. This will go a long way to keeping his son healthy. I'm not sure he'll be able to keep his job, though, so that's why I suggested signing up now. If he's getting double-digit wages now, he should be able to get the same from a temp agency, and a lot of temp jobs can lead to permanent ones.

2007-05-23 20:50:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Have him talk to the the Child Care Resource and Referral network in his area, they sometimes have listings for sick child care. I would also recommend talking with the Early Childhood Education majors or others at the local college. If he can find a handful of sitters who are familiar with his son, he will usually be able to find one who can watch him. They can be pretty cheap if he offers use of his washer and dryer while babysitting as part of the pay. As for the union stuff, have him talk to the union anyway and see what he can do and how close he is to becoming a member. If he isn't or can't be a member, he shouldn't have the dues deducted. I would also have him talk to the county (it will be the same folks who do the welfare stuff even though he isn't applying for welfare). They can usually help him or refer him to someone who can help him get and stay employed. Hope some of this helps a little.

2007-05-23 19:18:13 · answer #3 · answered by Momofthreeboys 7 · 0 0

I fear the same problems, I am a single dad with custody of my 2 kids. I have been with the same job for 7 years. I just got custody of the kids back in april. Just 2 weeks ago, I feel ill and was in the hospital for 3 days. They removed my gall bladder and apendix. I went home after 3 days and my mother had the kids. She helped me until I could walk ok again. Now I have been out of work for 2 weeks now and I am on short term disability through my job. That is what i pay for. It is called benefits.

He is going to have to have help. No other way about it unless he wants to be on welfare.

2007-05-23 18:58:03 · answer #4 · answered by Bones 5 · 0 0

Our local hospital has "sick daycare" program. It can be costly, but it is a nice alternative to staying home. I suggest he makes some calls or checks with his pediatrician for recommendations.

Also, does this father have relatives that would be available if he needs to work while his son is sick? Maybe a grandparent?

I was a single parent for many years and I understand the difficulties involved. Lean on friends and family because you need to!

2007-05-24 01:00:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If he has a regular job, his absence is protected by the Family Leave Act, and he could sue if he's fired for protected leave. If he's a temp, he needs to find out what his hiring agencies policies are, and if the FMA applies to him. Unions have noting to do with this issue.

It's inconvenient for employers, but it's the law.

2007-05-23 20:48:47 · answer #6 · answered by Sweet Eden 4 · 1 0

a million. A cellular telephone if she does not have one. If it extremely is not an decision, no longer understanding what she likes, i could advise a enormously necklace or something like that. you ought to even take her with you to p.c.. one out that she'll have the skill to positioned on lots and say "thank you, my dad gave it to me." while people compliment it. yet then, i like rings and she or he could no longer. you ought to easily furnish to take her procuring one weekend and purchase her some outfits or books or regardless of it is she likes. That way you get to spend time jointly too. 2. I actually in basic terms had an prolonged communication with my supervisor and another coworkers approximately this :P many of the adult men with daughters reported sixteen. I say 15 or perhaps 14 (your call, you're her father... once you think of she's mature sufficient). yet once you flow away it too long she'll do it besides and then she would be able to no longer experience like she would be able to talk to you if she needs to and you extremely do no longer choose that. 3. What time does she upward thrust up interior the morning? Curfew must be a minimum of 9 hours before that so she would be able to get domicile, get to mattress and get a stable sleep in the time of the college week. At 13 i could say 9 in the time of the week, 10 on weekends is enormously life like. known advice: do on no account freak out approximately boy stuff. you extremely, truthfully choose her to have the skill again talk to you and she or he would be able to no longer if she's worried you will get extremely disappointed. Be open along with her and she or he'll be open with you.

2016-10-05 22:56:44 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Welcome to the world of single parenting. It make sno difference whether you're male or female. It's always hard. I lost my job because my ex wouldn't fetch the children on a Sunday morning, when I had to work.
The child has a mother. Not a good one, but is it not possible for her to help out when the child is ill? Does she not have family to lend a willing hand. Her family might disapprove of her behaviour and be glad to extend a helping hand..

2007-05-23 21:28:00 · answer #8 · answered by True Blue Brit 7 · 1 0

what is mom doing if like mine she has whores herself around the world
show that you re the best parent and things will work out
share important things like dentist
don't be mean and things will work out

2007-05-23 19:25:02 · answer #9 · answered by coaltruck344 4 · 0 1

fedest.com, questions and answers