i said 'no' because of our religion?

Question

i love him. so much. i love him ever since the first time i saw him. he has everything i want in a man. he's not perfect. but i just love him. oh my god. when he told me that he love me, i am so happy. that is the first time i felt loved. he's the first man i love. he's clever, good boy, and i scored well in exams, so we are like a great pair.... but, i said no to him, because the differnce of our religion. i feel bad, he feel bad. he's not living near him, so i explained my answwer through phone. what do i do now? i love him, but religion, is a barrier that can never be broken!

i am not going to convert. so does him, that is sure. i wan to marry him. he does too. but the problem.....religion...

Answer 1

I'm not an expert in love, but I want to help you as much as I can. You have always sounded so kind and sweet.

Ok, first thing is that I have questions. Did he ask you to marry him? Is that what you said no to? Also, how old are you both, and how long have you been together? At one point you say he has everything you want in a "man," then later you say he's a "good boy." I'm guessing you're both young, and in college? (It's hard to tell, but it would be helpful so that everyone here can help you in the best way that they can).

But my point is, why rush things? Especially if real love is growing, there is no reason to move too fast. I'm assuming you are quite young (I am young too, I'm not judging!), but it seems to me that as young people, we have to think, "There is so much I have yet to learn about myself and the world, about life, people and love." I'm all for people falling in love and going for it, especially when it is true and deep; I just see no reason to rush things, especially at young ages. I guess what I'm saying is, ask yourself if there is a real reason to rush this relationship to the next level (which is different if you've known each other for years, which I cannot know obviously). But in any case, marriage is a very big step, no matter how long you have known the person you are with.

Only you can know the true answer to your question. You clearly are devoted to your religion, as it sounds he is. I'm not going to judge religions, but ask yourself this: What does your heart tell you? Is it OK to love another person who has not been raised in the same religion? To me, your heart is where God is, more so than any other place. If the answer you find in your heart is that it will never work, then it will not. But make sure this is how you truly feel.

Again, I am not judging or saying I know the answers to life, but this is just how I feel. And I genuinely, sincerely want to help you. Maybe a good idea would be to spend time away from him for awhile, and evaluate who you are, who he is, and how and why you have fallen for each other. With that time, both of you will be able to think more clearly, and appreciate what you have found in each other.

Maybe you will find a way to marry each other; maybe you will break up--but do not be anxious, afraid, or sad. I have said before, I believe true love knows no end, so even if you decide not to stay together, he should be willing to be there for you as a friend forever.

You are a sweetheart and I urge you to be patient with life. Maybe this guy is your soul mate, but it is also possible you have not yet met your true soul mate. Take your time and please do not rush yourself; you can only give your heart to, and spend your life with, one person. Trust yourself, trust what you feel in your heart, and you will always be alright.

I hope this helps,

Best wishes :)

Answer 2

If you knew that religion meant that much to you why did you let it get this far to the point where you are in love with eachother. It did not have to progress this far. When you next meet a man make sure, before you jump into bed together and wisper I love u to eachother that he is someone that if the relationship progresses that there will be a potential for a future. There can still be things wrong that would have to be solved or the two of you may break up over, but with religion you knew and yet went into knowing very well that you can't compromise on it. Too bad you are hurt but when you are careless with your hurt you get hurt more easily.

Answer 3

I have been on the other end of that deal. I was engaged to this girl for a year, when she moved home with her parents. They said she couldn't marry a non-Mormon. I had gotten out of the Navy and was setting up a life for us when I got the call. That event has been a real set-back in my life. If you can't marry someone over religion, then tell them before it goes to far. It WILL hurt for both of you but it is the only ending to your story. Good Luck dear.

Answer 4

I guess it all depends on what religous differences u have. I guess there are some that cannot marry, so that is up to you. Can u change to his, can he change to yours? Is that not realistic? If u love him and knew of his religion why did u date him? U will never forget him so its best to try to work it out. Are you an adult, can u leave your family and go with him and not worry about religion? Hard question but the answers can only come from you, its your decision to make.

Answer 5

Since when? People convert all the time.. Plus you are going to allow a concept to get in the way of what may be the only true love of your life?

Answer 6

ur question is too difficult to answer... may be if u could give some precision about the religion of both of u i could answer...
if u r of one religion then it doesnt mean that all other religions are bad though there are 'bad ones'...
gd luck...
the only thing i would say right now is that u sit and talk with someone and think well b4 deciding anything...

Answer 7

I don't think God wanted people to not be together because of their religion. If you love him then be with him. If you want to practice your religions separately then do so. No one ever said you had to have the same religious beliefs to be together. If God wants all people to live together in peace then why would he care if you two worship him differently? (assuming of course you both believe in God)

Answer 8

You should try talking to your
parents.

You guys can still love each other.

Just don't do anything that will
get you a spanking in the butt.

And just because you scored well
in tests doesn't mean you're perfect
for each other. Don't let those quizzez
fool you.

;]

Good luck.

Answer 9

if religion is a problem frm ur end, and if ull really love each other, ask him to convert. At the same time convince ur parents dat u cnt b happy with nyone else but him

Answer 10

I don't know how to help. My dad said I can never go out with a guy of another religion unless he is REALLY willing to convert. Maybe you could hint this to this guy you love.