Is it okay to give the same engagement ring to a different fiancee?

Question

So the first engagement crashed and burned. I still have the ring and am considering proposing to my new girlfriend with a new ring but with the same diamond from the previous one. Can anyone support me on this or am I way cheap thinking of doing it this way?

Answer 1

as long as the setting is different i think it's ok to use the diamond.

i wouldnt give her the exact same ring as the first ex. this could be very upsetting to your new gf.

diamonds are expensive (i understand this) and you can't go around buying a new one each time a relationship falls through (that's why you should make absolutely sure you want to spend the rest of your life w/that person).

using the diamond is ok as long as the rest of the ring is brand new

congratulations

Answer 2

Either sell the ring outright (you won't get close to what you paid for it), or have the main stone reset, as you mentioned.

Giving the same ring is bad karma, and every time she looks at the ring, she will know it wasn't originally meant for her. Also, every time you look at the ring it will bring up thoughts of the woman from the engagement that "crashed and burned". I'm glad you didn't say you want to just give her the same ring.

Does she know the ring exists? Ask her if she minds if you have the main stone reset in a ring of her choice. She may not mind at all. It's the thought and love that the ring symbolizes not the ring itself. My first marriage, we bought a second hand ring, it was what I wanted, and the ring had nothing to do with the divorce lol.

Don't start your marriage off with a lie by not telling her you reset the diamond. It is lying by omission if you keep it from her.

I hope everything works out, best wishes!

Answer 3

I'm a girl and I don't see a problem with having the same diamond that you got for your ex. I think rings and weddings are expensive affairs, and it is important to be practical. Having said that, I know that many women don't feel the same, and would hate nothing more than the diamond that their boyfriend got for the ex. You are the one proposing, so you should know how is she going to react. Is she a practical person that won't mind? Is she very romantic and have a lot of ideas of how engagements and weddings ought to be?
Lying is not an option, but you could make it look OK with some nice words..."I thought I had found real love some time ago, but I was wrong. I am glad that didn't went through or else I would have never met you. I didn't bought this ring for her, I bought it for my true love, and that is you" or something like that...

Answer 4

Does she know that you still have the ring from the previous engagement? I think it's a bad idea just because I'm a girl and I would want my own damn ring, but as long as it's not the exact same ring in general, maybe I would be ok with doing that. Alot of jewlery stores will let you trade in rings(as long as nothing is wrong with it and you have the paperwork) for another one. I would try that first. Good luck!

Answer 5

In short, no it is not okay.

It is not just a cheap way, but it could also symbolize a bad omen for the new relationship. Even though you may not know it now, everytime you look at that ring thoughts of your previous fiance will be evoked.

All together you would be best selling the ring and putting that money to a brand new ring for a brand new beginning!

Answer 6

Hell no.....no woman wants an ex's seconds, which includes jewelry [especially engagement rings]. Ok, here's the deal.....get a ring that symbolizes your love for her, not a symbol of you being cheap. Just imagine how she would feel to find out that you shelled out the bucks for your ex, but not for her. That would crush her heart. From personal experience, I would suggest you hold out on a ring until you can afford the one that you actually want to buy. Try opening a jewelry account, so that you can pay the ring off slowly at a cheap monthly price.

Answer 7

I doubt anyone else will agree with me on this but I have to say it's ok...Do you think your girl will ask if it's the same diamond? I'm married and all I care about is how beautiful my diamond is....I look at it all the time, and I've had it for 8 years.. What's the specs on it (clarity, cut, size, etc)...Maybe you can get a really beautiful setting and have the diamond polished up a bit...

The nicer the ring, the less I'd care where it was before it landed on my finger...But hey...I picked out my loose diamond so I know where it came from, so maybe I'm being a bit optimistic...I'm pretty sure I'd practice the don't ask, don't tell policy if I really wanted to save the cash/credit and I was unsure how that person would react to the "re-dedication" of this ring..

Answer 8

The ring is simply a symbol. I'm getting married on Saturday the 26th and he can't afford a diamond. I don't care I got the most important thing... him. So, don't fret over it... I wouldn't say anything to her, but if she has your heart when you propose, then she has the most important thing right there. The ring is replaceable, you are not! Good Luck!

:)

Answer 9

I would trade the ring for a new one. If she found out that you gave it to a prior girlfriend, she might not be very happy. Does your family or your girlfriend's family have any vintage jewelry that you could use to make a ring? Maybe a diamond from her grandmother and your grandmother? That would be a nice tribute.

Answer 10

No way. Bad karma, and classless. Just trade in the old ring and get some cash from it to put toward your new fiance's ring. These are two entirely different women, and there should be two entirely different rings!