I've been with the same girl for the past 3 yrs and i really love her i can tell that she feels the same way about me. If i am ready for sex, do you think that she maybe ready too. Sould i ask her if she is ready or should i be the first one to make a move on her?
2007-05-22 06:04:21 · 30 answers · asked by cayobway 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
3 years???and still didn't have sex???????????????
what's wrong with you both...
yes you should do the 1st move...how old are you anyway????
2007-05-22 06:09:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's fabulous that you are beign a mature person that is thining this through and considering things before just jumping in and getting it going.
Let me tell you a littel bit from my personal experience:
My current boyfriend was with a girl for 3 years and they were engaged. They had sex and then she got pregnant (after awhile of having sex). Things ended up not working out and they broke up. There have been nothing but problems for everyone now because of this situation. I'm really trying to keep it short, but basically, sex can lead to a complete nightmare. I would say do whatever you think is appropriate for the level of your relationship. Really discuss it and think about eveyrthing that could happen. I guarantee that if sex completely changes a relationship for the best or the worst. You can be the greatest couple and then you add sex into the mix and it may completely destory everything you guys had. There are a lot of pressures and problems that come along with it...and of course, what about pregnancy? If the relationship doesn't work out, it's a complete and utter mess, trust me. And legally, it's just ridiculous, and believe me, guys that aren't married get the short end of the stick when it comes to paternity and custody and all that jazz.
Birth control you say? Yeah, but B.C. causes a lot of girls to get REALLY moody and gain a lot of weight...its' a big change to a girl's body. You're preventing something that your body WANTS to do...it's not natural...sex was made to make people have babies...everything wants to do it's job, so chances are...its going to succeed at one point no matter what.
I really didn't want to write a novel, but this is a really big step that you shoudl really consider...
I think the risks far outweigh the benefits if you aren't married. In my boyfriend's case, he had been engaged to this girl for 2 years and had already set a date and they STIL didn't work out...and now we're wrapped in a huge nightmare...
Also consider age and relgious beliefs and the like. Is it going to have to be a secret from parents or something? That's a huge stress, especially for girls.
Please let me know if I've helped at all!
2007-05-22 06:19:23 · answer #2 · answered by [♥]andrea[♥] 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sex not occur before:
1. You are ready to deal with a pregnancy, should it occur
2. You are ready to deal with an STD, should it occur
3. When you know how a woman can become pregnant (all the ways it can occur)
4. When you know what the various STDs are and how they are transmitted and how to help protect against them
5. When you are ready to insist your partner wear a condom (female) or insist that you wear one (male)
6. When you are on a reliable form of birth control and using it properly (female) or ensure that she is (male)
7. When you are ready to deal with any emotional issues that may come from being intimate with another person
Until you've got those things covered, you should not have sex.
If you've got the above covered and you're both ready to take that step (and both of the age of consent) then enjoy!
2007-05-22 06:08:31 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Guessing you started dating her at a young age. I wouldn't suggest it. You can set the mood so that if you could have sex you wouldn't be crazy for asking. You want it to be like... .
You guys had a great day, dinner etc, know your at home. Just watching tv lights somewhat deem. If you guy start making out, rub her lower back , and keep your hands on her. Build up a lust for one another. Then pull back look her square in the eyes and ask her if she wants to go further. This will make it her choose. Although you did pretty much just seduce her... Sorry those who think this is sneak but you can't really ask that straight out with out starting a fight.
2007-05-22 06:13:54 · answer #4 · answered by Life 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after 3 years it should be very obvious to both of you what you want ---- i would suggest that if you are unsure you are really not ready ---- the best way to ask is a romantic meal if not where you live then somewhere safe and comfortable with a meal (not too heavy) converstation some gentle touching she will be aware and can then make the decision to continue or not ---- its still a wonderful night if nothing else happens and if it does then always use protection --- enjoy
2007-05-22 06:18:50 · answer #5 · answered by Waterdragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can have sex with her. But how old are you? Don't ask her. Just let your body move and make sure she's ready before you do this. But if you don't want to be a dad yet than i suggest wear a condom.
2007-05-22 06:10:44 · answer #6 · answered by Brittneyyyy(: 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should ask her. Dont make a move on her unless she is willing to go further in the relationship with you. Sex is something that humans do; to pleasure themselves and to create babies. So respect her if she isnt ready to have sex with you.
2007-05-22 06:11:28 · answer #7 · answered by KMC!! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? I mean to be honest three years is a long time, let her know that you are ready and see if she is. If she isn't and you love her that much then continue the relationship. If she isn't you have to weigh your options
2007-05-22 07:02:26 · answer #8 · answered by jozy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go for it ask her its the only way to know i been with my girl for 2years and 1/2 i told her im ready for sex but she said she not ready so if she say the same then dont get mad respect her wishes......this is coming from a guy so now u know plus u cannt force her and anyways if u love her the way u do respect her for wat she wants....just tell her u agree and will wait for her thats all she is askinf for...
2007-05-22 06:10:41 · answer #9 · answered by erick461_2005 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a normal conversation bring it up jokingly but if she goes along with it ask her if she is serious...dont plan it, it makes the girl scared and uncomfortable. if she says yes the next time u r alone play around have fun then lean in for it if she goes along, have fun....
2007-05-22 06:39:43 · answer #10 · answered by ***CHELS*** 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tHATS GOOD PROGRESSION TO BE AND A RELATIONSHIP BUT IF U AND HER BOTH ARE READY TO ENGAGE AND SEXUAL INTERCOURSE GO AHEAD ONLY THING I CAN SAY IS USE PROTECTION AND ASK URSLEF IF U CAN HANDLE THE CONSEQUENCES THAT CAN COME AFTER BUT IF SHE ISNT READY WAIT THATS THE BEST DONT PRESSURE SEX INTO A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE SEX CHANGE A RELATIONSHIP AND WAYS SHE OR YOU WOULD NOT LIKE../
2007-05-22 06:09:08 · answer #11 · answered by devandanielle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋