How do you feel about teaching young children to kiss on the mouth?

Question

I have come across several parents who will teach their kids to kiss on the mouth, including mine., and I always wondered if that bordered on inappropirate. I know kids are just so cute and lovable, but how appropriate would this seem when the child gets older, and now this kissing on the mouth has become a habit? Won't it seem strange if your child is going around giving peole kisses on the mouth?
Also, wouldn't it expose them to possible pedophiles because it seems like a rather overtly sexual gesture?
I knew this little kid, who would actually use his tongue when kissing ie do a little lick thing.., (I don't know where he got the idea to use the tongue), but it seemed a little strange when he interacted with everyone around him in that way, young or old.
What do you think of teaching your children to kiss on the mouth? Would you teach your kids to do that, and why?

Dalice, it wouldn't kill you to be civil. Seems to me you must be a very immature considering you have to revert to name calling. This was simply a curious question. And it's pretty presumptuous of you to think that I am saying kids want it. I think parents should teach boundaries, and I in no way indicated what you claim.
I was only asking because my parents taught me to, and it didn't work out too well, because some adults (I'm sure like you) couldn't keep it in their pants and had to have their way with little children.
That is one of the rudest and most immature responses I've ever gotten on yahoo answers...

MY TWO CENTS...
I only "sexualize" kissing on the mouth, because children are too young to know any better, which is why I think it's crucial that parents teach their children boundaries. It's important to define how close is too close. I personally would never let my child kiss anyone of the opposite sex on the mouth, regardless of whether they were a relative. In a Dr. Phil episode, they were showcasing a young girl who was sexually abused by her grandfather. Kissing leads to touching, and a child might continue to explore out of curiosity as they have NO sexual feelings yet, but an unstable adult could easily take advantage of that because they see it sexually.
And yes, dalice, kids grow out of it, but they also go through a younger, vulnderable stage, where they won't know any better.

This is why I think parents need to clarify good and bad touching early on, because it's a pretty hard concept for a child to understand that its ok with some but not with others, children can’t grasp grey areas (it’s pretty black and white)..and you’re right, when I visited my old elementary school a couple of years back, i saw young girls “flashing” a couple of boys who were running away…this shows me a problem with our western culture…a lack of boundaries.
And consider this…do you kiss your wife/husband on the mouth? Of course, but do you do the same for ALL your other relatives? So then when you do this with you child, wouldn’t it confuse them? I think to avoid confusing a child; all behaviour needs to be separated and labeled clearly.
I hope you can understand where I am coming from now. :)

This is why I think parents need to clarify good and bad touching early on, because it's a pretty hard concept for a child to understand that its ok with some but not with others, children can’t grasp grey areas (it’s pretty black and white)..and you’re right, when I visited my old elementary school a couple of years back, i saw young girls “flashing” a couple of boys who were running away…this shows me a problem with our western culture…a lack of boundaries.
And consider this…do you kiss your wife/husband on the mouth? Of course, but do you do the same for ALL your other relatives? So then when you do this with you child, wouldn’t it confuse them? I think to avoid confusing a child; all behaviour needs to be separated and labeled clearly.
I hope you can understand where I am coming from now. :)

Answer 1

I think it's a personal preference really. I don't care for it at all, but a lot of people do that it seems.

I don't think it's the most hygenic. I don't think parents teaching their kids contributes to the exposure to pedophiles, because pedophiles are going to be that way regardless.

This kid using the tongue, that is kind of gross though, and if his parents were aware, probably should have taught him not to do it.

Answer 2

That's a lot of questions.

Yes, it would seem strange if my kid went around kissing people on the mouth... or hand... or cheek.... because kids should be "going around" kissing people randomly. WHERE they kiss them becomes the secondary issue, wouldn't you agree?

Children are exposed to pedophiles everytime the leave the house or use the internet. In no way do I agree that a child's kiss seems like a rather overtly sexual gesture. I am surprised that you draw that conclusion.

My daughter kisses immediate family on either the lips or cheek. Who else would she kiss? Close family friends perhaps, on the cheek, but it's hardly a "habit", nor is it in ANY way sexual. Affection is an important and wonderful thing to instill in a child. It's unfortunate that some see it in such a sexual way.

I don't think Dalice's answer is wrong. Crude, perhaps, but he made quite valid points which you did not address in your response to him.

Answer 3

I'm not too crazy about my son kissing anyone on the lips except for family (mommy and daddy are the only ones who really get them). My son isn't crazy about showing affection to family unless someone opens their arms asking for a hug, he'll keep his distance. When it comes to his friends, he has a handshake that his father taught him - seems to work quite well.

Answer 4

I don't personally care for mouth-kissing, but I believe that in some cultures it is usual and customary. I don't think it has any more sexual connotations than any other type of kissing or physical contact; however, I do think there is far more likelihood of spreading germs this way.

Answer 5

This is a silly question, my parents brought me up kissing them on the lips and I have never had the urge to kiss random strangers only family and my 3 boys have been and will be brought up the same. There is nothing wrong with kisses on the lips as long as it's not a snog, I really don't understand why kissing family is a problem.

Answer 6

I allow my kids to kiss very close family on the mouth, everyone else no...We need to give kids more credit they
tend to know what's appropriate as far as this is concerned. I notice they kiss me, my mom, their dad, and my sister like that; but everyone else gets a hug and a kiss on the check. I didn't teach them that.

Answer 7

hey. i've always wondered about that too. not to be racist or anything but i've only noticed white people to do that.

my husband (who's white) thought it was weird as well since his mom used to kiss him and his brothers on the lips as kids. he asked me if i was going to kiss our kids on the lips and i just thought it was an odd question. maybe i'll go ask his mom now why she did that O_o

Answer 8

I taught my son, that it's ok to kiss Mommy and Daddy and family (grandparents, aunts, uncles etc) on the mouth, but that anyone else should be kissed on the cheek. Simply out of respect for their personal preferences. Knowing boys, he'll probably grow out of that soon anyway. ;)

Answer 9

FIRST of all, most kids aren't going around kissing strangers on the mouth. Most kids are wary and shy of strangers. I wouldn't worry about them kissing people they don't know on the mouth. I think you need to desexualize it.

Answer 10

I teach my children that only married people kiss on the mouth, when we kiss our children or they kiss us they kiss on the cheek, I think it is gross to see people kiss their kids on the lips.
Also my daughter does not diferentiate between us and strangers so I also teach her not to kiss on the lips because she will walk up to people and just kiss them, I'd rather it was on the cheek when she does this. We try to tell her not to, but she has some issues obviously that we are dealing with anyway, she has aspergers and has no social graces.