So my fiance and I are have been together for 2 years and we have set a wedding date 2008. I love his family for the most part, His dad and mom are wonderful to me. But his brother who has been dating the "devil" since high school just got engaged, and they plan on getting married before us! She is seriously the devil, she controls my fiance's brother and won't let him talk 2 me when she is around, She also ruined a family vacation last year by indirectly cussing me out through a bathroom door 4 no reason, ignores me when I am in the same room, wouldn't congradulate my finace and I on our engagement and treats the family like SH*T! but the family tries to just forget things when they need to just put her in her place!I really cant stand her & we all wish he wouldn't marry her.She has been such a horrible person to me.I know she is just super jealous and envious, but that doesn't make it alright for her to treat me like this. Fiance and I want to put her in her place w/o the fam knowing
2007-05-22 04:39:44 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Sounds like you all need to have an intervention with the mother in-law. Just explain to her that while you are thankful that they are paying for the wedding, it is still your sister and her son's. And it is so unfair that they basically have no say so in their own wedding. When she plays the victim card just explain to her that you all are trying to take her feelings into consideration but it is getting tired. It seems that she is the type that you have to be firm with, she won't break even if she makes you think she will. Please don't give up being the matron of honor do for your sister she really needs every ally she can get right now. Just talk to the mother in-law and put it all out on the table. Good luck:)
2016-05-20 00:17:41 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hurting people hurt others. As far as putting her in her place - why is that so important to you? Is your ego so small that it can't tolerate an insecure person spouting off to be in your life without making you want to defend yourself from whatever it is you find offensive? If you find her remarks offensive just say excuse me and walk away. Sooner or later she will get the idea that you will not tolerate that type of behavior and may stop it. But, wanting to get back at her will just add fuel to the fire and you also become part of the devil's plan to destroy the family.
I don't think you like her and I don't think she likes you, either. But, for the sake of everyone else, always be polite to her and walk away when she offends you without making some smart comment back.
2007-05-22 04:59:13 · answer #2 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way for that to happen. If she is the devil as you say, then you know she will make a huge case out of what you and your fiance say to her. And she will probably make herself victimized and possibly ruin your relationship with your future-in-laws. I am sure everyone sees her for what and who she is but they do not want to cause any trouble. The best advice I can give to you is for you to just ignore her. That is a lot easier said than done but sometimes you just have to pretend that she is not there. Spend time with the part of the family that you get along with and when it comes to family gatherings with your future sister-in-law, just smile. A smile kills more than any harsh words.
2007-05-22 04:46:29 · answer #3 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's your fiance's family. He needs to be the one to speak to his brother and the girlfriend. I know everything seems to be coming down on your end and you're bearing the brunt of her attitude...but when it comes to family, it is a mistake to insert yourself in the middle of something like this. Your fiance knows it bothers you greatly so he needs to be the one to speak to his brother about it. If the two of you confront the girl directly, she will, no doubt, do her best to turn the brother and probably the rest of the family against you two.
The best thing would be to just avoid her, but barring that, next time she speaks to you in a defamatory manner, tell her that you will absolutely not accept the way she behaves toward you. Beyond that, stay out of it. Good luck.
2007-05-22 04:57:16 · answer #4 · answered by sisterdynomite 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess you didn't like the answers you got yesterday. Have you ever questioned yourself why you feel so threatened of her? Is it because her wedding is before yours? Is this some kind of competion for you? If you really want to start your marriage off with this sort of drama, go ahead and put her in her place, but the family will find out and you and your fiance will look bad. Try to connect with her if you can and see if the two of you can't vow to be more civil to one another.
2007-05-22 04:52:28 · answer #5 · answered by NONAME 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
So you didn't like the answers you got yesterday?
What good would putting her in her place do? Do you think it will change her behavior? It won't. It will just mean you're sinking to her level. Is that the person you want to be? Do you want to totally ruin your relationship with your BIL? He's still going to marry her isn't he? There is seriously nothing to be gained by creating yet another rift in the family.
By holding on to all this anger toward her you're giving her such power!
2007-05-22 04:46:41 · answer #6 · answered by LB 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is so common. You fiance needs to stand up for his future wife and that is the bottom line...... family knowing or not. You are the person he will be spending his life with... not them.
2007-05-22 05:01:27 · answer #7 · answered by jackson 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Want to win? Ignore her. Just ignore her. Pretend she's a house plant.
You'll never win by confrontation, dialogue, or anything else.She's just pathetic.
Live your life, ignore her all the time and do your best.
2007-05-22 04:46:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let her antagonize you to the point you come down to her level. That's what she wants. Be civil and cool to her but don't be overly friendly. Sounds like the rest of family is on to her also.
2007-05-22 04:57:55 · answer #9 · answered by mimegamy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just dont go there if she is there....you'll just cause more problems with the family and your fiance....its not that hard to do...best wishes
2007-05-22 04:46:24 · answer #10 · answered by butterfly_kisses81501 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋