My fiance and I broke up reciently. She left me. I want to ask those of you who have been dumped what you did to constructivly deal with the anger and pain of having someone dump you. I work out every night with free weights, ride my bicycle for 7-10 miles here on the Blue Ridge Parkway and I write a journal to collect my thoughts. I begin school at the end of this week which will help to bring me out of this funk, but what are some of the things you have done to get your mind out of anger?
2007-05-21 23:29:52 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hey, I think its very normal to feel anger just after a breakup. You just can't stop thinking what went wrong especially when you have put in so much efforts in the relationship. You feel hurt, bitterness simply because you truly loved that person.
I did felt the same way as you before. I kept questioning myself why this happened....I tried to keep myself busy but it didn't stop me from feeling bitter during wkends when I have less to do. I think I only finally let go of the past when I finally realised that its really for my own good. Why should I make myself miserable, angry and bitter when my ex-bf has already moved on?? My ex wouldn't care about how I feel after the breakup and he might even be happy that I'm feeling bitter. Just tell yourself that you want to live a much better life than your ex-fiance.
It will not be easy to let go...All I can say is that 'time will heal all wounds.' All the best to you! You can do it!!! :)
2007-05-22 01:25:30 · answer #1 · answered by Grace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After 6 yrs of marriage it was hard for me, I basically shut down. I only got out of bed to go to work, & eat here & there.
In the end, I came to the realization that everything happened for the right reasons, in my favor... I am better off.
But then things happened, & people - real friends came into my life. Female Friends that occupy my time with happiness & a closeness that was never obtained/achieved with a marriage license.
Side thought >>The person your with is supposed to be your closest friend & confidant. But what if all they do is bring you down all the time, & hurt you emotionally ?? How can they then be a true friend ?
* Stay true to yourself & realize that everything is NOT your fault. Controlling anger is NOT easy.... while married, I wanted to have a boxing bag in the back full of sand, so I could go pound away on it regularly to vent. I wanted someone to talk smack so I could wail away on them, that is how much anger my ex caused me to have bottled up.
Re-finding laughter about anything/everything released alot of this anger & gave me a more optimistic outlook on life.
2007-05-22 00:15:24 · answer #2 · answered by ccchevydude 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hunted the ***** down and killed her! Just kidding! But you are probably full of hurt and anger over what happened. Seriously, If u feel like doing something stupid, talk to a friend, talk to anyone(even a stranger, like now), I know from past history that things do get better, Hell, I now laugh at what happened in the past because my life has moved on. I know it's hard at the moment for u but it does improve. Hey, just think, the next Miss Uni could be ur wife?(it does happen). All the best Mate.
2007-05-21 23:45:27 · answer #3 · answered by MichaelBuffy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are doing them Try talking to a counselor or takeing a anger management course Work on getting closer Do not rush into a new relationship Work through the pain of this break up with a counselor
2007-05-21 23:40:06 · answer #4 · answered by chameleon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are on the right track, get busy.. I was dumped by bf 3 days after proposing and planning our wedding. Sure it was painful and humiliating coz everyone knew we're getting married.. But dont let pain and anger overcome you, rather overcome anger and pain by acceptance of the truth. Though hard, try, find it in your heart to forgive..You will feel at peace..Then bounce back, love yourself more, pamper. It always feels good to know that you look your best .
2007-05-21 23:41:06 · answer #5 · answered by Trish 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anger is part of the grieving after the loss of a loved one. We all go through stages. From sadness to anger to sometimes feeling numb. And you said it yourself. The relationship wasnt made for both of you. In this case she wasnt happy, and YOU can see why she wasnt happy. Dont make a fool of yourself and cuss her out on the phone. Buy a book or direct your anger towards writing down in paper what is making you angry. It helps me. "you know its love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you're not part of their happiness".
2016-04-01 02:03:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cry my heart out after having a quarrel with my siblings, punch the wall untill my knuckles bleed, starve myself to detox for the whole day, drinking only water. Sleep the day away. Thoes are the things i do, and oh yah, drank 6 cans of asahi and drop dead on the bed, slept for 12 hours.
2007-05-21 23:35:40 · answer #7 · answered by jade s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start hanging out more. Spend more time with your friends. Sometimes it helps being around other people. School will definitely help. Find something that you enjoy doing (cooking, traveling, etc) Anything that will get your mind off the situation. Also PRAY and READ YOUR BIBLE!! That is what helped me more than anything.
2007-05-21 23:35:42 · answer #8 · answered by sparkles52986 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a hard one to do. I'd try to find anything bad about your ex to try to make you feel better that you are no longer with her. Try to go meet other people and just have fun! Eventually you will grow over it and no longer feel the need to have her back. Hope I was a help!
2007-05-21 23:34:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget the past. Concentrate on future. Anger will destroy you.
2007-05-21 23:34:16 · answer #10 · answered by hanvis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋