If you had a non-curable STD, but also not deadly, would you bother dating? My boyfriend and I both have it, we don't know who gave it to whom, as neither of us had symptoms until after we started dating. We have a baby but I don't want to stay with him just for that reason. Also, I want to live a Christian life and although he claims to be Christian also, he isn't as respectful toward me as I think he should be. Also, he drinks a lot, but doesn't think he does. But if I dated, would it be realistic to expect to ever develop another relationship with a guy? I mean, I'm 24, but not as pretty as I used to be, or as skinny because of the pregnancy. I have a baby who's father is in the picture, and I have a non-curable STD (the symptoms can be easily treated, but the virus that causes the symptoms can't). Even tho it's not deadly, what guy would want that when the choice is that or a girl with no baggage? Would it be fair of me to ask anybody to accept me the way I am?
2007-05-21 19:24:36 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
If I was up front with a guy, he would turn tail and run and if I let him get to know me first and then tell him, it would be like I deceived him, wouldn't it? I don't know that I would have given somebody like me a chance before I got this disease, so I find it hard to believe that anyone would give me a chance now.
2007-05-21 19:26:27 · update #1
It's the HPV virus that causes genetal warts, and I have asked for healing. I felt like maybe God would grant it if I proclaimed my faith in front of witnesses, so I got baptized, but that was almost a year ago.
2007-05-21 19:30:41 · update #2
There is no safe way to protect yourself from this. It's transferred by genital skin contact, and a condom doesn't cover all of that.
2007-05-21 19:31:39 · update #3
Sweetheart God loves and treasures you very, very much. Don't you think He has a plan for your life. After all, we are all damaged goods when we come to Him. He is in the life changing business and He will provide all your needs and those of your baby. Personally, I think the guy is not the best for you, if he is as you say. Being the father, he will always be in your life so I would suggest you pray consistantly for him and wait to see him changed by the Lord. You might want to read The Power of the Praying Wife for some wonderful help with that.
As for your problem, God can take care of you there. What I suggest is to consentrate on your relationship with the Lord. You don't specifically say you are a Christian or have had a personal experience of accepting Christ as Savior, but it seems you are if you want to live the Christian life. If not, that would be first ( Repentence, confession, acceptance of Christ as Savior). That done, trust God with your whole life. Develope your relationship with God by studying the Bible, get involved in a local church, surround yourself with Christian support. I wouldn't be looking for new men relationships right now, but make a goal of growing in the Lord. If the father doesn't surrender his life to Christ, I know God will bring you someone who will be a good friend first and then it may develop into more. You have the child to consider and I would put the baby first. You are still beautiful if you please God in all your ways. I would suggest you always be truthful with any guys who are interested in you. If they run, they aren't what you can count on anyway. God knows your heart, and he knows your needs. Don't you think He can bring the right person to you? I know He can. But, first things first......get that relationship with God growing and take care of the precious baby. The STD thing is a minor thing when everything else is right. I pray God will give you a peace in your heart and impress on you how valuable you are just like you are; after all, He sacrificed His only Son for you.....can you understand your value when you consider all He's done to make you His child? God bless you and your baby and the father with favor and guidence.
2007-05-21 20:24:53 · answer #1 · answered by Joyful Noise 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I dont want to sound motherly or anything, but I am a mom and cant help myself.
First of all , I am so sorry this happen to you. I can feel your concerns and heartbreak through your words as I read them.
I cannot imagin what you are going through.
Second of all, (HANDS ON HIPS) Young lady , what are you doing ? If you wish to live a christian live then you should be
married before being sexually active. Yes I know mistakes
happen but if you are living in the situation its not just a mistake.
Third of all, I have heard this before a few times and was not
quite sure if I believed it but after hearing many stories I am
starting to think there is some truth to it. Some say that a
womans body was designed for one sexual partner and if
a woman becomes active with more than one partner they
are more likely to develop problems in the womb area. Ofcourse it makes sense that it would be more likely they would contract a std. That stands to reason. I dont have your
answer but I know that God is able to heal you.
Clean up your life. Remove sin from your life and make a true effort to live right and dont have any more sexual partners until God sends you the right man to marry. Maybe God will then heal you maybe he wont.........but I am certain you will
have a more productive and joyful life as well as your son.
If this man loves you, pray for him that God will cause his heart to turn towards God and you both refrain from sexual activity unless or until you are married.
Motherly love
2007-05-22 02:47:34 · answer #2 · answered by KITKAT 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are some dating sites for people with stds.
If I were you, when I meet a guy I would tell him. If he doesn't want to date you then he is no good for you.
Someone will accept you, it will just take time to find that right person. I suggest, since you want to live a Christian life you should live the life first. Then God will send you someone if God thinks that that is what you need. God never sends you anything unless you really need it if you ask him.
There are many guys dating girls right now with stds and don't even know it and vice versa. At least the guy that you date and tell will know what he is dealing with.
Don't stay stuck in this relationship because you are scared that no one else will want you. It will be a waist of your time and someone else will surely want you. Work out, take care of your self and your child, be happy, it will all work out for you. I will pray for you.
God Bless and I hope you find peace and love!
2007-05-22 02:33:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This may sound mean but that fact is you sinned. The bible says what you sow you will reap. now you are having the effects of the sin.
If you had not had premarital sex you would not have a child out of wedlock. And if you had dated a good christian man who you were both virgins at your wedding bed you wouldnt have an std either.
God has reasons why He makes the rules and if you had followed them you wouldnt be going through so much heartache.
If you are still living with this man you should either seperate or get married. You are living in sin.
Maybe sometime down the road God will bless you with a good christian man who doesnt care about your past, but first you need to stop living in sin. You will not find a good christian man while you are living in sin.
2007-05-22 06:53:26 · answer #4 · answered by kramerfam2000 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There's an old saying....."if you want the right person, you need to be the right person". I would forget about trying to change your boyfriend or finding another guy. You need to focus on yourself...on becoming what God wants you to be and leave everything else in the Lords hands. As far as finding somebody else and attempting to supply your other needs, I would take some advice from the gospel of Mathew.
Mathew 6:33 says " But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well"("these things" refers to your needs).
I would find a church where they teach the Word of God verse by verse and literally. I always recommend the Calvary Chapels but they are not the only churches that are good. This website will help you to find a Calvary near you:
http://maps.calvarychapel.com/
Start attending, start studying Gods Word and get into a smaller group, preferably a womens group that is interactive. These women will come alongside you and nurture you in your christian walk. Devout yourself to walking with Christ. If your boyfriend doesn't like it then maybe he'll just walk out on you and then you'll be done with him. But, who knows, when he sees the change in your life, he might decide that you have found something that is lacking in his life and he may decide to follow you in that path. You might find that you've already found your man. You say, not this guy. He'd never be interested in christianity. I work with people at my church who are totally committed christians who once lived lifestyes that would make your boyfriend look like a chior boy. The Lord does change people. If he does leave you, then you trust God to bring you someone else. God doesn't want that child of yours to be raised without a father. He will bring you someone. You just need to trust him.
Go to this website: http://ww2.intouch.org/site/c.dhKHIXPKIuE/b.2264355/k.BE55/Home.htm It's Charles Stanleys'
website
If you click on Today on Radio and then click on Achives you can get all kinds of Audio messages. I think his archives go back to 2006. If you click on 'This week on TV' you can get recent broadcast(in streaming video) and if you look up on top you’ll see ‘broadcast’ which will have ’video archives’ and audio archives’. This is the christian answer to your problem, which I believe is the only answer. He talks about depression, fear, worry, guilt feelings, lack of meaning in your life, slavery to habits and many more things from the bibles perspective. He talks about God and how you can know Him in a personal way. The topics are all labeled so you can pick and choose what you want to listen to. God does love you(John3:16).
2007-05-22 03:10:03 · answer #5 · answered by upsman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What was there for the two of you in the beginning? Did you love each other? Do you still? Can you work really hard on keeping it together? I don't recommend throwing your relationship away. If there is no abuse taking place then perhaps you can work on it. And get into church; both of you. Why has the relationship fallen apart? What caused the rift? I just believe your baby deserves for his/her parents to be together. Broken homes are really tough on the kids regardless of age. Don't give up. Take it to God ask Him to help you fix things and to show you His will.
2007-05-22 02:52:38 · answer #6 · answered by kwazeeme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello Elizabeth,
it seems like your a bit overwhelmed. take a deep breath, pray and hand your life over to the Lord.
Trust me, he knows what he is doing and can be fully trusted to take care of you and all of your needs.
If God wants you to have another relationship with a man it'll happen. You just have to be pacient, pray about it, keep your eyes open and know that everything happens for a reason. If it is God's will that you have another relationship the right man will come to you and everything will work out perfectly. And it may be the Lord's will that you dont have another relationship for certain reasons we probably will never know just learn to accept it, pray to will God's will.
Okay? And remember that Lord will never give us something we cant handle. Just take it day by day, everything will work out in God's time.
God Bless you!
2007-05-22 02:38:49 · answer #7 · answered by Bri 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When my husband left after our son was born, I was a single mother who was almost 30 and overweight.
I thought to myself who would EVER want me?
Now I am in a GREAT relationship with a man who is the best Dad to my son, and he is respectful of the fact that Joshua's Dad is still sort in contact with us.
I can understand your skeptecism and fear, but if you do not want to be with this man, then perhaps it is best to get out of the relationship. I think you may be surprised how many good men there are out there who would be willing to be with a great women, no matter what her baggage may be.
God Bless
2007-05-22 02:31:46 · answer #8 · answered by Beverly B 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Pray And Ask God To Give You The Answer
2007-05-22 02:32:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
As long as you tell him before you start a sexual relationship then you are good to go. However, if you are serious about living a Christian life you will have to get him to marry you first.
2007-05-22 02:37:26 · answer #10 · answered by Sarcasma 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋