How should I tell potential dates that I'm a Mom/Divorcee?

Question

Because I'm 22 years old... I'm sometimes dating young (college aged) guys. A lot of them just approach me in a store or at a ballgame and ask me out. Should I tell them about my situation right away or wait?

Also, are younger men (22) or older men (30's) probably better dating-material for a 22 year old Mom / Homeowner / Divorcee / Responsibility-Ridden Woman (ha!)?

Answer 1

I would say something right away like that sounds like fun let me see if I can find a sitter for my son/daughter, let me give you my number and I'll see what I can do. If he calls then you know he's interested. I would say the older men are better dating material. Most would be more mature and responsibility ridden too, but you should be the judge of that. Good Luck, Have Fun, Be Safe !!

Answer 2

First, you don't have to present a whole resume of your life to a potential date. He doesn't come up to you and say "I'm in debt up to my neck, still live with my parents and haven't had a relationship with a woman longer than 2 weeks so will you go out with me?" Initially, you just want to find out if the other is available and whether they are also interested in you. If you continue to date more afterward, then you start slowly introducing the facts of your daily life, which probably would come out in conversation anyway (if it doesn't, it probably means he's not really trying to find out much about you).

His age shouldn't matter a great deal (as long as he's legal age); it's what he's got inside and what his goals are. Some men, no matter the age, won't be interested in taking on kids/house. For others, that's just fine. You won't be able to tell until you get to know the man well enough to feel you could make a life with him, and then present him with all the "responsibility-ridden" you carry to see if he's willing and able to help.

Answer 3

Personally I would go with the older ones...the college-age are rarely ready to settle down and have a family of their own much less want to be around a lady that already has one of her own. I tried, in college, but it didn't work a whole lot. I've always been attracted to older men because they seem to have their heads on straighter and more of a 'game plan'.

As far as your situation, I wouldn't hide it - you wouldn't want them to hide it from you if they had kids already. Go in with it straight, it's who you are - you're a mom. If they're not up for it that's their problem. Be honest above all else. You come ready-made with a family, and that's just teh way it is. Frankly...okay, I'm not criticizing here, but my mom never considered a man that didn't like me. Granted she's about the closest thing to a nun I've ever seen wtihout the vows, but the few-and-far-between men that entered our lives were always first told that 1. she had a kid, and 2. they weren't going to meet me until she had a definate committment. Tha'ts another thing - don't go introducing your kids to any guy that you date until it's been going on fairly steadily for a while - and I mean about 6+ months to a year. You don't want to confuse them, and you definately do not want to expose them to anything that might turn nasty later.

Answer 4

Eventualy, if you think the relationship has any potential, you should tell them, of course. I wouldn't make it my opening line, but yeah, if you have any respect for the guy he probably deserves to know. Go out and tell them on the first date, or whenever you have that conversation about yourselves. Don't waste your time on them if they want to run the opposite direction.

Think about reversed situation: a guy is a divorcee and has a child. When would you like to know about it? Whouldn't you hate him if you dated him say for a year and he'd spring it on you one morning?

I don't think younger ones are ready to settle down and be a good dad to your kid.

Answer 5

You have no need to tell them until it comes up. You would be much better off with older men, they are more settled for a woman with responsibilities like you. Men as young as you want to party and do last minute things that don't fit your schedule. If you want to date young men, be prepared for a lot of heart ache. Any guy that young who wants to settle down you should run from and fast.

Truth be told, men don't really settle down until about 28 years old.

Answer 6

I think it best to be honest if a guy talk to you and ask's you out just say would it be okay for me to bring my kid. If the guy wants you for you and not just a fling then he will not mind. If he just walk's off then you know you just saved yourself the time spent on a date with a jerk!. Alot of guy's don't mind dating single mom's. I think it best if the kid is not with you at the time that you tell the potential guy you a single mom. I would say you may have a better chance with an older guy that is already over his wild early twenties.

I know it may sound blunt but if you want to save yourself some time ask the guy just out of the blue so do you like kids
if he says yes you may have a guy if he say's no then you can easily say to the guy yeah I don't think us going out is going to work. If the guy says why tell him you want like 5-6 kids and that you just adore babies that should make him run.

Answer 7

i think of 2d date is positive. That way you probably can see him as a guy or woman and not a walking affliction provider. Had he instructed you on the 1st date, what might your reaction have been? lots of the solutions right here seem to show that they had run screaming interior the alternative direction, washing their arms with bacterial cleansing soap and swishing Listerine. if it is the case, i might desire each and every HIV+ guy or woman might tell on the 1st date to weed out those @-holes. HIV+ individuals are human beings, no longer their status. they have each and every genuine and opt to work together with individuals. To the different solutions, think of roughly how many sexual encounters you have had. how many circumstances did you ask approximately HIV status previously or have been instructed previously? how many circumstances did you inquire approximately herpes, chlamydia, gonorrhea, genital warts or the different sexually transmitted affliction? how many circumstances have been you warned previously? i think you're all taking part in Russian roulette much greater commonly than you may care to admit. a minimum of this guy became honest approximately his status and did so - probably - earlier intercourse and surely earlier a stable emotional attachment more advantageous. I applaud him.

Answer 8

UHmm.. I'd say wait it out a little bit before it becomes serious.. If he aint telling you much about his past then why mention yours. However make sure they don't come inbetween you and your kid.. You could always ask them what they think about children somehow, and see their reaction.. I would say the older men who are in their late 20's or early 30's would be better because College boys are about getting laid and partyinn it up..

Answer 9

You should tell the potential boyfriends about your situation, if they want a real relationship it wont matter to them, chances are older guys won't worry about it at all where younger guys are more inclined to listen to there friends or family about issues regardless about how they truely feel.

Answer 10

You should just be raising your daughter for now. If that many men are asking you out there thought must be just on sex..
If you insist on dating make it a coffee, brunch, day date..until you really get to know him...Good Luck