my boyfriend and i have been together 5 months and i really love him. we have been having sex and it hasnt ever been awkward or bad or changed us in any way. but we talk all the time and we have our routines and we have both noticed that its getting a little boring almost. so we ended up breaking up and getting back together only a hour later and its great now but i thought it was before. he was saying that he had all these doubts and he just wasnt sure if he wanted a girlfriend anymore. that i was the girl he wanted if he wanted a girlfriend. and all this came out of nowhere, and it was all this stuff about how he was so tempted by other girls but only because he couldnt have them. he would NEVER cheat on me, he was cheated on really badly and i know he loves me enough not to. i just get scared because it all came out of nowhere and i was lucky enough to get back with him within an hour but how can i trust that he wount have "doubts" for real next time. and i wont know its coming
2007-05-21 11:20:11 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
let him know that you need stability and if he isnt 100 % sure then he needs to take some time and figure out what he wants
2007-05-21 11:23:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had something similar happen to me. I had been with my boyfriend for 2 years and out of the blue he started acting weird and I aked him what was arong. He said the same exact things. We broke up 2 weeks later and we got back together 3 months later.
My advice to you is if you love him, stick it out. I did. I didn't know whether I could trust him not to do the same thing again. But I stayed and tryed my best to work it out. It has been 2 and a half years since then. Now we have a baby and we just got married. We have been together a total of 4 and a half years. So if you want him, make it work. Make yourself trust him if he isn't doing anything wrong.
Trust is what builds a relationship. If you don't have trust, you have nothing.
2007-05-21 11:27:42 · answer #2 · answered by jautis02 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't really tell if he will have doubts next time or not. But if he has been cheated on b4 you have to understand that it is very hard for him to trust another woman so just take it easy and enjoy what you have and of course keep reassuring him that you r not like that and that u love him. With time who knows. I guess he just felt like he can open up to u now that he knows what he wil b missing without u by his side
2007-05-21 11:27:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships are about finding that middle ground. Even married ppl struggle with this. The elements of a good sexual marriage is free, total, and faithful.
It isn't that you have to trust ... it's that you have to check with him always to see if he's totally giving himself to you. When he holds stuff back, he's hurting himself and then you. Also, you have to be careful with the "Free" to make sure that you are not coercing him in any way. The true freedom of love is also violated when partners use sex as a tool in their relationship for some other end. Perhaps sex is employed to gain power or control in the relationship. Perhaps it’s offered as a “reward” for something else or withheld as a “punishment”. None of this kind of behavior says, “I want to give myself to you freely to affirm you r goodness and our marriage commitment.”
However, this is more to obtain "Nuptual Love" within marriage. IDK what you're goals are with having sex outside of marriage ... I guess you need to soul search your mind, heart, and goals 4 that.
2007-05-21 11:35:37 · answer #4 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And to think he actually trusted in you enough to confide in. He felt comfortable telling you what every man feels from time to time. You have no idea how difficult and uncomfortable it is for a man to confide his feelings like that. He should break up with you! You are obviously insecure and your insecurity over his honesty is going to sabotage your relationship. Grow up.
2007-05-21 11:27:05 · answer #5 · answered by Thegustaffa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Someone out there made him contemplate it, but I really don't think it had anything to do with you or what you weren't doing. Seems that he thought about it and came to his senses. Keep the lines of communication open.
2007-05-21 11:25:13 · answer #6 · answered by Truth Hurts 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him about your fears and concerns. You'll both have to look into eachother to see why you've been together for 5 months.
2007-05-21 11:25:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
break up with him.
2007-05-21 11:22:48 · answer #8 · answered by 123456 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋