I was with this guy I am dating the other night and we were having sex and in the middle he says that he would like me to be his wife. I said what do you mean. He said that it was just something we should think about in the future. We've talked about this before and he thought I was rushing the relationship. Not that I was trying to get married and have kids but calling him my boyfriend. To him, this was too soon about a month ago. Now, he is saying that he wants to marry me. This is the second time he has said something like this. Both times we were messing around. Is he being serious or just not thinking with his head?
2007-05-21 09:24:59 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He's caught up in the moment. He doesn't mean it, you'd be best off ignoring him when he talks like that.
2007-05-21 09:28:18 · answer #1 · answered by Clever_Cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not a definite proposal, but if he's mentioned it twice it seems like he's giving the possibility some thought, and wants to know if you're open to the idea of possibly marrying him someday.
I wouldn't take anything a guy says during love-making too literally... it may betray their deeper impulses, but it's not always a promise they are willing to commit to in a more sober moment.
I would definitely have a talk with this guy and clarify where the relationship currently is - are you just "dating" (and possibly seeing other people), or are you in a committed relationship (boyfriend-girlfriend, monogamous, long-term)?
2007-05-21 16:35:28 · answer #2 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to sit him down for a hands off heart to heart, ask him point blank if this is just "bedroom talk" for him , or if he is serious about considering a future together.
Also take time to ask yourself, 'Is this a man I want to share my children with, if things didnt work out with him, would I want my children alone with him? Could I share custody and a link for life with this man because of children we may have?'
Maybe asking yourself, and him the right questions now, will either put you on the right path together or make you realise that you shouldnt be on the same path together at all.
If you cant talk about these things... the he definetly shouldnt be considering marriage even in the future... communication is a must.
2007-05-21 16:32:18 · answer #3 · answered by Minx 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say have a serious sit down talk with him and ask him straight out. That's the only way you will find out if he is serious or just messing around. However, I would also suggest that you be prepared for whatever his answer may be. Sometimes the truth is more surprising than we think.
2007-05-21 16:29:19 · answer #4 · answered by Rach 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, in the heat of passion things are said. If you are not sure, just bring it up one day. Just say something like, "last night you said you wanted to marry me and we should talk about this. Why don't we talk about it now?" Don't sound accusing, or skeptical. Just bring it up like it's a general conversation, but still be serious about it. Marriage isn't something to take lightly and you're right to be concerned. Just talk to him: he has more answers than any of us on here.
2007-05-21 16:29:48 · answer #5 · answered by Honesty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men usually have issues with discussing their feelings to anyone, especially a woman. When you're intimate, the sheilds are down and he can blurt out his feelings without souding mushy and "sensitive".
Do you want to marry this guy? You have a choice to make, but you'd better make him ask you with his clothes on and properly first. During sex seems a bit too juvenile.
Good luck
2007-05-21 16:34:48 · answer #6 · answered by kb6jra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to sit down, keep all clothes on, and tell him that you are not trying to rush, but you want to know where he sees the relationship going. If he doesn't have the same goals for it that you do, then he's wasting your time.
2007-05-21 16:30:36 · answer #7 · answered by Whiskey Tango Foxtrot 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he's not serious...its too soon way too soon..i think hes just caught up in the moment and if you were his wife hed you would be all his and he likes what he has with you...but marriage?? start talking more about it and see how he reacts.
2007-05-21 16:28:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relax, he's talking himself into marrige......You'll probably get a ring and a nice dinner in about 1-3 months..
2007-05-21 16:29:04 · answer #9 · answered by Lee B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him when he's less ... preoccupied. Is he serious or just enjoying himself? Is he worth it if you can't call him your boyfriend? And what does he want for this (and the next) stage of his life?
2007-05-21 16:32:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋