How can anyone not believe that homosexuality begins at birth?

Question

I don't get it. I'm not gay and couldn't be even if I wanted to. I'm not attracted to my own sex. Don't you think it is the same feeling for gays?It's like telling a right handed person to be a lefty, it just doesn't work!

Wayne T-just to add, we are ALL born as sexual beings.

Randy G- Asexual? I KNEW EXACTLY who I was at a very young age. Early childhood crushes, for example.

Answer 1

Thanks for your post...because you are absolutely correct...I have been gay, as long as I can remember...even before I realized what sexuality was...I knew I liked people of the same gender...it was not learned...my sexuality, is my God-given sexual orientation....why people cannot accept things different than them, is beyond me.

Answer 2

How can someone have a sexual orientation before puberty? If people are born either gay or straight, then how do you explain bisexuality?

I had no idea about sex, or gender, when I was a kid -- sure, I knew that girls usually wore dresses, and that some people said that they had cooties, but I had no feelings for either girls or guys (I had both close female friends, and close male friends, and I could play equally well with either set of friends.). Saying that I was either gay or straight at that point would have been miss-descriptive, because I was obviously asexual with no feelings either way. I suspect that most other kids were the same. Just because someone played with dolls as a child, or liked dancing instead of playing football, doesn't mean that he is doomed to be a gay person who HAS to have sex with men when he is older. What PC nonsense!

I suspect that most, but probably not all, kids are somewhat bisexual when they hit puberty. We become attracted to the opposite sex because we are conditioned to think that this is acceptable. After awhile, that way of thinking becomes ingrained into our subconscious as a habit, and we think that it was automatic because we tend to forget our confusing & painful early adolescence.

Human sexuality is a complex thing that is driven by many forces, but usually when one wants sex, what that person really wants on a subconscious level is affirmation, not necessarily physical touching (if sex were purely physical, then you could simply do it all by yourself). People want sex, because they view sex as the ultimate form of attention, and thus the ultimate form of affirmation. It appears that those who lacked attention from their fathers growing up tend to turn to sex as a way of getting male attention. We know that women who have a bad relationship with their father tend to be promiscuous people who have a strong sexual appetite, while women who had a good relation with their father are usually not, so why is it not reasonable to assume that something similar happens in the minds of certain men to make them gay?

===edit===

You had crushes when you were five? Was it because you saw a fairy tale movie, or read a book, that talked about a knight saving a princess and getting married (and living happily ever after)?

So you equate this acting out of a sanitized fairy tale fantasy as the same as having sexual feelings? I honestly don't think that you knew what sexual attraction was way back then (you are probably projecting adult feelings onto your early memories in hindsight). I think that you just were nurtured to believe that "girls" got a boyfriend and got married because that is what everyone around you taught you by word and by example, so you acted it out because you we playing at being a big girl.

Answer 3

The nature vs nurture argument comes into play here.. and once again, it cannot be said for certain WHICH, both or neither play a role, or how MUCH of a role in homosexuality. I know gay men and women, who knew from their first sense of sexuality that they were 'different'. For them, I do believe it must have begun at, not birth, but conception. Something that went one way in the womb when most of the time it goes another. But I also knew one gay man ( he died of AIDS several years ago) who was a true friend in my life, who fell into homosexuality quite by 'accident' as it were. He ran away from home at a young age to get away from an abusive step-father, and fell in with a group of people who helped him, and also turned him on to the lifestyle of homosexuality. There is no doubt in my mind that had he not felt obliged to these people in some way at such an impressionable age, he would have been a fine husband and partner for a woman.
So... it really can be both. I am convinced of that.

Answer 4

I don't know for a fact if people are 'born gay' or become gay during their formative years.

Obviously some people just do not find the opposite sex attractive, but there are probably a pretty wide variety of reasons for this. It can sometimes be attributed to someone of the opposite sex treating them badly while they were growing up.

For whatever reason - there are definitely gay people, and I don't have any problem with that. If they've found what works for them - more power to them.

Most people that don't like gays either think it's 'icky' (unless it's two hot chicks, then they love it) - or they have some 'moral' religious beliefs that preach that it is sin. Either way, they need to wake up, and grow up.

Answer 5

First of all the REV needs to go give a sermon somewhere else. I have taken many psychology classes, sociology and human behavior classes and from all I have read and learned and seen it isnt a choice per say as it is what it is. You are either born gay or not. There has been scientific proof after autopsies of the brain (I cannot remember what part) of homosexual and heterosexuals. I could go on and on but I wont. I also believe it to be completley wrong for people to judge others based on their sexuality. I think this is a topic that I just shouldnt have responded to-sorry!

Answer 6

Ah, the old nature vs. nurture argument.

I'm not so sure anyone can definitely say whether or not a person is "born gay."

I truly think it depends on the person's individual circumstances and situation.

I have known people who were aware of being gay from a very early age as well as those who weren't aware of any feelings until some traumatic event had taken place.

By no means am I asserting that all homosexuals fall into one of these categories- I think it's up to them to decide what category they fall into, if any.

Answer 7

God does not create a person with homosexual desires. The Bible tells us that a person becomes a homosexual because of sin (Romans 1:24-27), and ultimately because of their own choice. A person may be born with a greater susceptibility to homosexuality, just as people are born with a tendency to violence and other sins. That does not excuse the person choosing to sin by giving into their sinful desires. If a person is born with a greater susceptibility to anger / rage, does that make it right for then to give into those desires? Of course not! The same is true for homosexuality.

Answer 8

I completely agree.

I think the whole "THEY CHOOSE IT!" thing comes from the fact that a lot of religious people can't accept that, if their God makes people a certain way, that he would create them gay. I mean, instilling that thar sinful homo-sexuality in a person from birth isn't something God would do--right? RIGHT?!

So... if God didn't do it, then they must have chosen it. Despite the fact that there's things that might link homosexuality to genetics (meaning from the moment they're conceived), and the fact that homosexuality occurs all the time in nature (meaning it's a NATURAL event). It's a silly if/then domino effect.

Edit:
I believe sexuality is shades of grey, personally. You can be attracted mostly to same-sex but also from time to time be attracted to the opposite sex (gay with heterosexual tendancies), you can be equally preferential to either sex (bisexuality), you can only be attracted to those of the opposite sex. There's a lot of variation and it's usually never black and white.

And to those that are saying that being born gay is like being born a rapist--the flaw here is that you're comparing homosexuality to RAPING SOMEONE and KILLING SOMEONE, which shows that you have a very, very biased viewpoint if the only things you can compare homosexuality to are harmful acts (i.e. you think homosexuality is harmful, which is an opinion and not a fact--unless you consider the bible fact, of course, but that's where we part ways. :P). Homosexuality would be better compared to something like brown hair or being tall or being born with genes that will make you bald when you're older.

Children are not born "sexual" per se, but there are plenty of genetic characteristics that don't show themselves until after puberty and later on in life. The whole "children don't think about sex!" thing is kind of moot.

Answer 9

with all due respect.

this is just like saying killers, thieves, rapist are born killers, thieves, and rapist.

you see this is not so for we know that all these people took their own choice to be this way. it is the same with homosexuality, baby's my friend are to little to know what is right and wrong and are to little to know what is good and bad. you see everyone gets their character and believes because of what was in their surroundings and because of the things that they went through when they where young.

if you teach a child to play sports when they are young they will grow up to love sports and play them themselves.

if a kid is made fun of and out cast by society then that child will grow with allot of pain in is heart that will push him to get revenge and do some afoul things.

so you see everyone turns out the way they are because of their surroundings, family and the situations that happen in their life.

don't believe me?

then think about how you have turned out and you will see that the way you are and the way you think is because of the things you learned, went through and the experience you have.

Think about it and you shall see.

Answer 10

I do not agree with that..

a man is born 100% man while a woman is born 100% woman... the society we grow in, the kind of friends we hang around with may affect the orientation..

In many countries gay is unheard of..

Answer 11

I don't know.....I still think it's a choice. I think babies are sometimes born with qualities that make them more attractive to the same sex...such as a deep-voiced woman with a more manly shape....but does this mean she has to be with a woman? No! I think that these qualities make a person question their sexual orientation during puberty.