Im not working the mother is, she a good mother i cant lie but her priorities doesnt put her child first. What can i do if i think my child is being exposed to weed. The mothers family babysits for her they all smoke! it was said that they dont smoke around her yet her clothes would always wreak of cigarettes, today i went to pick her up and the niece was smoking weed in the room with her. im trying not to end up on the evening news. I keep my daughter 4 days out of 7 i hold on to all of my reciepts. but what can i do?
2007-05-21 07:25:05 · 8 answers · asked by Poppa 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Call social services. Try to get evidence of her smoking weed (video camera maybe if you are sneaky).
If you are unemployed, I suggest going to job help services. Post your resume online on a job service internet site. Fill out as many applications as you can. Getting a job will definetly improve your chances of getting custody of your child.
Make sure that you get a job and evidence of her smoking weed before you go to social services.
2007-05-21 07:34:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to tell you this, but it's probably not going to happen. If you want to try, speak with a lawyer, and find a job first, becuase no court is going to grant you custody if you have no means to support the child.
You will more than likely need to prove the mother unfit if you would like full custody of the child, which is extremely hard to do. Smoking cigarettes around a child is sadly not a crime. You could have her drug tested, but the results will also depend on the judge. I've seen cases where the mother tested hot for marijuana, or cocaine, and the judge said that recreational drug use is not a factor in being a good parent.
I think that attempting this will be money wasted. Money that could have gone to your child, but good luck no matter what you decide.
2007-05-22 09:11:58 · answer #2 · answered by Slynn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the US. Smoking tobacco around children isn't illegal. It's awful. It reeks. It's nasty. It's unhealthy. But so far, it's not illegal.
Speak with her mother. Explain that you smell the cigarettes on your daughter all the time and that you're concerned about second hand smoke. Just say that you're concerned about daughter's health - no scene. No drama. No "threats to call child protective services."
I would document this. Write and mail EX a letter politely addressing your concerns about the second hand smoke. Keep a copy for your files.
And you may indeed have to get child protective services involved - especially if there are drugs in the house.
And as much as you don't want to - the only answer for the drugs is calling the police. At least that's what MY lawyer said when I discovered my teen was using.
Document every time you suspect there's drugs going on in your EX's house. Every time. Name names, give details. Everything. This isn't a joke and drugs are not to be taken lightly. WRITE IT DOWN!!!
Speak with your lawyer about the custody thing. With drugs in the house, this is now a matter for the courts.
Yes, you may end up on the evening news. But which is worse?
2007-05-21 15:36:56 · answer #3 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I first can tell you that it is very hard for the father to get custody of the child. The mother is usually given custody.
If the child is in any danger, I would suggest you first getting some type of job, so you can say you are bringing in money to support the child, and go to social services and talk to one of the ladies and tell them exactly what was going on and they can guide you through the steps that you need to take and most likely do an investigation on what you have brought to their attention and they will do what you call, an emergency hearing and most likely grant you temporary custody as long as you can support the child financially and by providing it with a place to sleep, etc. The social services will then get the mother the help she needs to stop her problem (yes the social services are 100% for helping the mother), give her free counseling, or whatever she needs to get help. Make her get supervised visitation until she has completed the therapy steps, then she can file again for custody.
I know it's a crazy process, but I have been through it before with my dad. We were surprised how social services reacted, with what the mother was putting the son through, but they definitely focused on helping the mother. But if she is doing drugs around the child, I would get him out of that situation any way you could, especially if you are paying child support, because chances are she is using that on drugs.
You will have to file to the court again, with proof of custody and go back to court again to file for them to stop child support, but if you are not working, I doubt you are paying any- you should definitely get a job:) It will help A LOT!!
2007-05-21 14:49:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the mother is a good parent then it will not hold up in court and you will be wasting your money that could be spent on the child's needs. I would advise speaking with the mother and asking if there is other arraignments for babysitting. Also if you are not working than there is no reason you can't take care of the child while she is working.
Why are you holding on to receipts you should be paying for your child's needs?
2007-05-21 14:55:27 · answer #5 · answered by aintlifegrand 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to contact your atty ASAP!! If you cannot afford an atty check your phonebook for "legal aid". If your daughter is being placed with people who smoke around her then the mother may not be the fit parent. Just because the mother works doesn't mean she is the better parent. GL!!
2007-05-21 14:33:34 · answer #6 · answered by blondie7795 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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Good luck
2007-05-24 05:50:49 · answer #7 · answered by niomi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a job and a lawyer. they can help you better. if they're smoking pot with the child, it shouldn't be hard. good luck
2007-05-21 15:18:26 · answer #8 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋