Hi, I've been in a few long term relationships and I find the ones that are usually the most fun or most 'successful' are the ones where me and the other person dont spend every waking moment together. I mean, we see each other a few nights a week 2-4, hang out.. watch movies, go out to dinner, whatever. I find when I am in a relationship where i live with a person all we do is fight and complain, its like we spend soo much time together that we dont really appreciate the time we spend together.
Is this a common thing or am I just socially hosed?
2007-05-21 05:36:44 · 6 answers · asked by Drew W 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well, I mean I guess I get what you have all said its just that me and the girl i've been seeing each other have been seeing each other for 2 years, and we're in love and i really do love her its just she really wants the traditional "in your face/high intensity/day in day out/do everything together" kind of relationship and I want to have my space, we were living together and we were driving each other crazy so I broke it off, now we have been kind of seeing each other 2 or so times a week and when we're together its great, my thing is are we incompatible as people or do we just need a different relationship style? I mean she tells me that she really wants to get married/live together, and all of that stuff...
2007-05-21 06:17:59 · update #1
First of all, I don't think that a relationship that ends in marraige is the only "worthwhile" kind. I believe any relationship in which you gain something from it, is in the long run worthwhile. And while you go through many people you will narrow it down to someone which you are compatible with.
Anyway if it makes you happy to only see the person that youre dating a couple of times a week, than thats what you should continue to do. If it makes you happy and they are happy then the relationship may work out. However, everybody is totally different and finding a partener that doesnt mind only getting together a couple of times a week, may be more difficult.
I believe this is probably fairly common. I know that if i hang out with my boyfriend too much, that sometimes i get annoyed with him. So i guess that everybody needs their space, and if you happen to like a lot of space, then so be it.
2007-05-21 05:49:00 · answer #1 · answered by kandiefreak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with your take- but then I'm 49 and not married, and have no strong desire to be, either. Along the way, virtually all my friends have married, some more than once, and they agree with the philosophy that marriage should be the end result of relationships, and after a given time, marriage should be the end of the road, or it's time to move on. I don't feel that way, and in fact I'm involved now in a 18 yr relationship, and we don't even live together - fine by me! My family is baffled and most of them- especially my mother, think I'll regret not having children, blah, blah, and the "security of marriage", but everyone knows what's best for them. I'd say wanting marriage is the more socially common choice.
2007-05-21 05:43:32 · answer #2 · answered by GEEGEE 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think in all relationships we learn something about ourselves. What we really want, what we can and cannot live without. Nothing is a waste, but there are those certain things we would redo if we could. I am currently living with my bf and we dont fight or complain too much. I mean ya, you live with each other, you WILL get on each others nerves and step on each others toes, but thats part of getting to know the person in my opinion.
2007-05-21 05:42:06 · answer #3 · answered by nascar4me8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you just haven't found that one special person that you feel comfortable with 24/7/365. And maybe you don't really like that type of thing and that's okay for you, as long as you find a companion who is of like mind. I have a friend who says she'll never marry and only likes to date. Good luck and God Bless.
2007-05-21 05:41:33 · answer #4 · answered by tersey562 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had the same problem so far. For me, it's expectations of the living together situation. I think we didn't have the same idea about what that should be like or the level of commitment it indicates. Could that be what's going on with you, too?
2007-05-21 05:48:19 · answer #5 · answered by The Naughty Librarian 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-04 21:22:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋