Manners of calling someone by their first name...when is it necessary?

Question

I am 18 and my parents always taught me that it was rude to call an adult by their first name...however, I just recently had someone ask me to call her and her husband by their first names (they are in their 40's). I said that I would feel a bit awkward calling them by their first names, but then she said that it was etiquette to call someone by their first name if they ask you to once you are 18 or older. Is that true? Where is the rule of etiquette say that? If anyone can answer with a source, that would be helpful.

:)

Thanks!

Answer 1

I knew a couple when I was your age, had known them since my birth..their names were Tom and Emma Young. They were down home southerners and told me to call them by their first names.. I just couldn't do it, and I always called them Mr. Tom and Miss. Emma. It never felt right to call them Tom and Emma.

I knew an older lady for 20 years before she died at age 94 (I was in my 20's when I met her). Her name was Grace Hayes, and I never, ever called her anything other than Mrs. Hayes.

I have no source, just the etiquette my mom raised me with.

If you don't feel right calling them by their first name only then call them Mr. (first name) and Miss. (first name).. if they ask why tell them you don't feel comfortable any other way.

Answer 2

It is always polite to do as someone requests. She has specifically requested that she would feel more comfortable if you did as such and you should always wish to make someone feel comfortable.

Now I was taught that it was at 21 when you are an adult. You can call someone by their first name. I call my bosses by their first name, but I have a casual work environment. Prior to being of age though--I agree with you I would never have called an adult by their first name.

However don't assume you can ever drop a military title or a doctor in front of a persons name until you are given specific instructions to do so.

Answer 3

Try and see if you are comfortable calling them by their first names. If you ar then by all means do so. If you are not then don`t to this day and I am 60 years old I still refer to people as Mr and Mrs from my past so does my sister. We never called them by their first names we just could`nt do it even when asked.

Answer 4

I was taught the same way. I was told to call my elders Mr. or Mrs. then their last name. Being from down south, I was also taught to call my elders ma'am or sir. I think, regardless of age that if someone ASKS you to call them by their first name, go ahead...why not? They asked you, therefore you aren't disrespecting them. You are actually respecting them...their wish to be called by their first name by you.

Answer 5

Yes usually if they ask you to call them by their first name, it is OK. You are 18 now, you are an adult too!

Answer 6

Actually, as soon as someone tells you "Please, call me..." then it's perfectly polite to address them by first name, because you're now respecting their wishes and making them feel more comfortable.

Hope that helps.

Answer 7

there is no age limit to when you can address a person. it is polite to address older people as mr/mrs unless they tell you otherwise.