I just assumed my sister would want me to be her maid of honor in her wedding, but instead she asked her best friend to do the job. I'm her only sister - so there's no conflict as far as her having to choose between sisters. I'm pretty upset about this - should I not be?
2007-05-20 18:14:33 · 22 answers · asked by Jess 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Yes I would feel offended. I personally think that the bride should always chose family before friends. You will ALWAYS be her sister, but will her friend always be there? Blood relation makes for a strong bond, and as a bride, I would have picked my sister. (I don't have a sis, so that wasn't an option for me)
I understand where you would be upset, and that is okay. But try to not say too much about it to your sister. You don't want to cause any trouble, she has made her choice. One day she may regret it, and you'll be there to say "I told ya so..."
2007-05-20 18:27:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 6⤋
Well, Im getting married and I also chose my best friend as my Maid of Honour, rather than one of my 2 sisters (but they are bridesmaids).
I chose my BF because I feel closer to her than my sisters and I know I can count on her to make sure my wedding day runs smoothly (being the Maid of Honour is no simple task! its not just a 'position'. Maid of Honours have a lot of things they must keep up with and be in-charge of!) Dont sweat it; being the Maid of Honour isnt all its glorified to be.
But to answer your question, I don't think that you should be so upset about it all. I'm sure your sister had a reason for choosing her BF, but don't make her feel bad about it. Getting married is stressful enough without having guilt thrown into the mix.
And DEFINATELY dont listen to Rachel above; asking the current Maid of Honour to 'step down' from her position is not only extremely rude, but it could cause some serious problems between you, your sister, and your sisters best friend.
Good luck & I hope everything turns out okay :]
2007-05-21 02:41:25 · answer #2 · answered by *~ Nicole ~* 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think every woman has the right to the wedding of her dreams. Many women pick their best friend as their maid of honour. If there are no problems between the 2 of you, I would just let it go. Be there to help her out in any way you can. Are you at least a bridesmaid? I don't really blame you for being hurt, but having an argument with her about it will only make things bad between the 2 of you, and neither of you will want to have bad feelings to associate with her wedding. Maybe you could find out in a round about way why she chose her friend instead of you? Maybe you could ask your Mom?
2007-05-20 18:25:13 · answer #3 · answered by wendygirl1000 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know it must be hard but I went through the same thing. It seems like you would be automatically her maid of honor. I would talk to her about it and see why. There might be a really good reason. I would just put it in perspective. It is just for one day. When you sister has babies you are going to be right there, all of the celebrations in life you are will always trump her best friend. Let her friend have this one thing because there is som much more that you get with your sister.
2007-05-21 04:19:02 · answer #4 · answered by Jessica C 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My maid of honor is going to be my best friend that I have known since kindergarten, not a sister. Don't be upset about it, it is her day, and when the day comes, if it hasn't already, if you want her to be your maid of honor I'm sure she will be. But if you have a friend you wanted to be maid of honor, how would you feel if she were mad at you for it.
2007-05-20 18:33:23 · answer #5 · answered by Jeani 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't sweat it. It's just one day. (The wedding doesn't matter - the marriage does). As long as you are a part of your sister's life and you get along, it doesn't matter who the maid of honor is. Besides, being maid of honor can be a big pain in the butt sometimes.
2007-05-20 18:20:02 · answer #6 · answered by me_myself_&_eye 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
That's tough - but you have to understand that sometimes people want a friend to be the maid of honor; it doesn't mean she loves or values you any less. I understand your being hurt, but it's your sister's wedding and I would try to be supportive and happy.
2007-05-21 05:24:58 · answer #7 · answered by Amanda R 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i want my little sister to be my maid of honor..but i had to face the reality that shes not that reliable..i love her to death but i need someone that i can depend on completely and totatlly. I love her more than my made of honor..so dont think that she loves you less..give her the benefit of the doubt..im not saying you are not reliable..just give her..her day..and be the most supportive person at her wedding..give her a special gift and a special toast..maybe she will know ever though you werent her maid of honor.....you are her sister..and no one can top that..good luck
2007-05-20 19:34:17 · answer #8 · answered by torrescy21 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It is her wedding and she can do as she wants on the other hand it is ok to be upset about it, also being a moh is alot of stress and can cost alot as you have to fork out for the bridal shower and anything else, have you spoken to her about why she chose her friend, if your a bridesmaid i wouldnt go getting upset about it but if your not then tell her you would like to be a part of her day and ask if their is anything you can do at the wedding.
2007-05-20 19:23:00 · answer #9 · answered by Calebs Mummy 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My best friend will be my maid of honor, but I have 2 sisters and they are both young (12 and 18) If I chose either of them the other would have been mad so I just chose my friend. when it comes time for them to get married I am not going to be offended if I dont get to be the matron of honor...
2007-05-21 02:21:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I wasn't asked to be a bridesmaid or maid of honor in my sibling's wedding and I was not upset at all. I could sit down during the ceremony!
Perhaps she has another role in mind for you... bridesmaid? greeter? another position?
2007-05-21 01:21:14 · answer #11 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋