You don't care for your in-laws and they dislike you. Because of some unfortunate situation your in-laws need a place to live. Your mate ask if his parents can move in indefinitely. You don't want them to live in your home. How do you tell your mate Hell To The Naw!
2007-05-18 15:47:41 · 23 answers · asked by stacy_branch 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is a really tough one. Even though you don't have a great relationship with your In-Laws, these sound like extenuating circumstances so that makes a difference. Maybe you could compromise with your husband and his family to just come and stay for a week or 2 and that's it. I think it's the "indefinitely " part that would be so bad and that's where I'd have to draw the line. Anyway. i feel like in this case, you really should compromise, put aside the differences that you can and let them stay until at least they can find another place. It would not only mean a lot to your husband, but maybe you can all work a few things out while you are together. If not, then just stay very busy & gone as much as possible while they're there. Just put the shoe on the other foot and think about if it was your family. That may help you give in a bit . Compromise is a big part of marriage and our families should be there for each other if possible. I hope things work out for you and that a good decision can be reached for all of you. Good luck!
2007-05-18 16:02:42 · answer #1 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your partner if this situation is worth a divorce? Because if you are pushed into an unlivable situation it will do nothing but cause stress on your relationship. Tell him that they can move in temporarily until other arrangement can be made. Or if you are capable maybe have an addition built on to your home so they can have their own living quarters. That way you can both have your space and not have to crawl over each other. In that case limits must be set and make sure your partner and his parents stick to them.
Good Luck and Bless and your Partner!
2007-05-18 22:56:34 · answer #2 · answered by tigger46161 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, unless you want hubby to hit the door, I would NOT recommend telling him that they can't move in at all…because no decent child is going to tell their parents, "sorry Mom and Dad, but you have to live on the streets".
I suggest saying they can stay temporarily (for x number of months) as long as they treat you with common courtesy (since there seems to be some animosity between you) while they’re there. OR shell out some money for them to rent a place.
2007-05-19 01:03:35 · answer #3 · answered by kp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would refuse to do it and have my husband help them look for an apartment. If your inlaws have not treated you right I would not let them into my home and disrupt my life because their lives are disrupted by what ever unfortunate situation had caused them to be homeless. If i had to get the entire family , my husband and myself to donate money to help them do this then that is what I would do. It will cause to many problems and you and your husband will not have any privacey when you want to be intimate and will take up needed room for your own life styles. If your husband allows them to move in anyway I would tell him untill they leave you will be staying somewhere else or be renting a hotel room. Why would your husband put this on your life when his parents don't even like you. They should have thought to treat you better in the past and maybe you would have extend the hospitality to them. I would find someone else to take them. Good luck sweetie.
2007-05-18 23:04:48 · answer #4 · answered by Lindsey 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Does your husband know about the situation between you and your in-laws? He needs to realize how difficult it would be to live with people who you know do not like you. It's hard enough to share your home sometimes with people you DO like. Maybe you could help them out financially instead of sharing a home (if they moved in, your overhead would increase anyway, right?). That way your husband can see you are not opposed to helping them out-just opposed to kissing your privacy goodbye.
2007-05-18 22:56:13 · answer #5 · answered by Debbie D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dnt if you want to keep your marriage and the peace in it. Ive been trying to figure out a way to d exactly that with my mother in law for the past 7 years. I cant come up with anything legal and dont want to end my marriage of 27 years. Good luck
2007-05-18 22:58:56 · answer #6 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I laughed because you gotta be African American due to the fact you said Hell to the Naw!! That was funny. If they dislike you then why would they want to move in with you. What's the reason why they need to move in with you.My mama always told me that " All grown folks need their own house"!
2007-05-18 22:52:43 · answer #7 · answered by Slim 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
They're family. Suck it up. You gotta do what needs to be done to take care of yours in the world. Family is important and you should be there for them regardless. You'd want no less for yourself, your husband or your children from them.
2007-05-18 23:02:44 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him it would make a hostile living environment and you refuse to live that way. Offer to help some other way. Financially? Finding a Sr. citizen apartment?
2007-05-18 22:58:05 · answer #9 · answered by Lady J 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have as much right to say NO as your husband says YES. So technically that is a draw. If you are ready to go for broke and bring your war with your HUSBAND, by all means.
2007-05-18 22:53:22 · answer #10 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋