SHE SAID IT WAS BECAUCE I FORGOT TO DO THINGS LIKE;HOLD HER HAND AND STUFF LIKE THAT. ALSO THAT SHE IS AFRAID TO OPEN HER HEART BECAUSE SHE DONT THINK I CAN CHANGE.WHAT CAN I DO TO WIN THE LOVE OF MY BEST FRIEND AND WIFE BACK SHE IS MY WORLD MY EVERTHING MY LOVE KNOW WHAT?
2007-05-18 13:59:12 · 21 answers · asked by skapunx_99 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Find out what is really going on with your wife? Does she have a boyfriend or maybe some guy that she would like to date? Is she sick of being a Mom and feeling trapped? Does she have to do all the work at home, go to a job, and all the work with the kids? If so, you should get somebody to watch those kids and take her for a weekend. You can spend the weekend together and really discuss what is going on. You need to get the straight answers. She may be depressed and need medication. On the other hand, if she has already made up her mind she wants a divorce and a new life, then you need to talk about important things that weekend. How will you tell the kids? How will you equally divide things? Shared custody? You should call an attorney and make an appointment on Monday to find out what the laws are in your state. Good luck. Forge ahead because this isn't going to get better without discussing it. It won't go away.
2007-05-18 14:04:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Swingers always talk about the train wreck couples. They say they can spot them miles coming, before they even start swinging. About half of what is called swinging, is what you guys attempted. Instead of working on your marriage, you make it worse. Swinging should be done by die-hard sex lovers, who really love each other, but want a party a little on the side. Going into a swinging environment not fully prepared is the best way to end a marriage. It does not sound good. Seeing that you broke though that frontier, I would start back at square one and just talk, talk, and talk some more without a course. Don't worry about saving your marriage, or try to talk her into something. If you can get her back online with the talk, there might be some hope, but if you force it at all, you will lose her. I would call in the professionals on this one. Get a counselor for the sake of your children.
2016-04-01 09:07:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi friend. The answer is in your question itself - "CHANGE". Married life is something that should have contributions from both ends. I would like to say that it is too late by your wife to complaint about this. As you said she is expecting some kind of change in you. May be you are not accepting the way or style she has about you. Please know her ideas about you and act according to it.
Your wife is just out of tract. Dont ever ask her "What is my mistake?" or "What should I do to win you?" This will make her to judge you in another way. She may think "Why he is not understanding me?" Since, 12 years over already, she expects that you should understand the situation and do the thing. The problem is on you rather than to blame her, because it is the duty of husband to satisfy the wife. Mere complaining like this is utter waste.
Just give a ear to her views and create a positive notion about you and you have done it!!! She will love you soon.
2007-05-18 18:34:28 · answer #3 · answered by Shinoj Kumar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When women don't get the attention they NEED not want, it makes them shut down. After awhile she is going to feel like you don't care about her anymore. What most men fail to understand is that these little things like holding hands or kisses just because mean a lot to a woman. It keeps your relationship intimate, without it you are just partners in a marriage with 3 kids. She needs to be loved, but also FEEL loved. You have to change if you want her back and you have to be willing to actually be open to her NEEDS. However, if she resents you already it may be hard. I felt like that with my ex-husband, I felt like his not doing those sweet little things meant he didn't really care enough to do them, so why should I care. Notice I said ex-husband, I resented him and I couldn't go back and he never did change.
2007-05-18 14:32:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a woman she wants to feel loved by you,she wants to get all your attention. Maybe you have forgotten with time that she too needs to gets compliments from you,she needs your caresses,she needs to hear you telling her that she is beautiful,she needs to hear you saying that you love her still as the first time. A woman is fragile. Start by being romantic with her. when your kids are not around flirt with your wife call her sexy,call her darling. At times bring flowers for her at home. When she sits near you hold her hand tightly. When you make love with her tell her that for you she is the best-wife you could have gotten. At times do sing some romantic songs with her. You'll see she will feel so loved by you that she too will start loving you again. I don't think that you wife doesn't love you but i think that she only wants you to be closer to her,she wants you to give her all your attentions.
Bye from Bella.
2007-05-20 02:10:14 · answer #5 · answered by Felicità 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to read the book together called the 5 love languages. You obviously thought you were showing her love. She obviously doesn't think you were. People talk in different love languages. It's worth a try. You'll be amazed at how effective it can be when you show love to your wife in the ways she wants to be loved. Don't give up---marriage is worth it. Love is something you continue to grow, and nurture, and exercise all the way along---just like in the courtship years. .
2007-05-18 14:18:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women need to be told they are loved. Just because you go to work and bring home a pay check that does not say, "I love you."
She needs to be wooed like when you were dating.
Ask her to talk with you once the children are in bed. Or ask someone to baby sit and take her out for a meal. And not to the local fast food joint.
If you really want her back, you are going to have to learn to listen to her concerns and stop trying to solve everything for her. All she wants is someone to LISTEN.
Compliment her on something other than her body. Her hair, her nails, the way she smells...
Stop on the way home and pick her a flower. Even dandelions will say I love you if you tell her their bright yellow color reminds you of her smile.
Work on it. Don't flop down in the recliner, beer in one hand and clicker in the other when you get home.
Belching and farting in her presence are out also.
Put on a tie and shirt with a collar and go to the next school event with her.
Go shopping with her and act like you like it.
You have work to do...get busy!
PS And don't think when you've won her back that you can stop doing these things.
2007-05-18 14:08:19 · answer #7 · answered by Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then let her know how much you lover her, if she is feeling something it means u might be doing it.c u need a healthy talk with her b4 she gets some helping sholder from outside, talk to her , go on dating alone, always have some time for her, talk to her about ur love n days that u have njoyed togather, talk about ur honeymoon thats the good topic to talk to make ur enviroment romantic. lover her, and dont just love her but express ur love by saying I love u darling or put her name. say it number of times. whenever u r alone, say it front of ur kids it will give u moral boost n ur wife will trust u more.
2007-05-20 00:26:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well she must have been hiding her unhappiness for a while, so really it is her fault. If you weren't attentive enough why didn't she tell you at the time she felt it? Tell her you want to work on things but that she needs to be more clear about her wants and needs and not hold things in. Good luck to you
"love is grand...but its a B1tch!"
2007-05-18 15:03:21 · answer #9 · answered by lovebug512 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not strange. Please talk with her something without sex. I think she has borne in her mind that u come near her only for sex. she may be afraid of having pregnency time and again.U give her ur sweet love .Bring her to some restaurant some time, carry her to some sight seening place. discuss with her about his parents home problem.assure her that u are her best friend. the things will change. sex is a part of love,but if some women is forced to have sex, when she is not hot, it create such poblem.Before having sex, prepare her mentally for that, this koka pandit says.good luck
2007-05-18 14:06:56 · answer #10 · answered by desigob_05 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋