Recently I have been having some personal problems regarding my family, I have one friend from childhood I always confided in, i called her a year ago to tell her about my problems, she seemed surprised at what i told her about my parents seperating when i was in HS and never told anyone. She got off the phone after a short time and has not called me back, i sent her a x-mas card and this was the first year she has not sent me one? She has my email adress, and i have not heard from her. so after 15 years of friendship she all of a sudden does not want to know me because i was honest about my past. Should I have not said anything?
Only reason i told her was because i needed a friend to talk to/
2007-05-18 09:47:30 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
She just seemed like she didn't want to deal with it.
I feel stupid as well because i told her i dont talk about this with anyone.
2007-05-18 09:50:45 · update #1
I left a message for her and got no reply back.
She always sends me a x-mas card so i take it as a bad sign. I sent her a card saying i hope we can talk soon, no reply.
2007-05-18 09:56:27 · update #2
Maybe she doesn't know how to help you, so instead of thinking about what to say, she's avoiding you.
2007-05-18 09:51:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, you've done nothing wrong at all. There is nothing wrong with what you told her or anything like that.
Also, her not contacting you probably has NOTHING to do with you and EVERYTHING to do with her. Maybe she is not in a social mood or she's depressed and doesn't want to talk, or to make the effort of keeping in touch (for the last year).
I'm guilty of the same thing. Sometimes I just want to hole-up all by myself and not talk to anyone I don't HAVE to talk to. What's happening right now is that she's letting her side of the friendship slip...and I'm sure she has her reasons...that have nothing at all do to with you in particular.
The important thing to remember right now is that this is not about what you said or did.
If you'd like to try seeing if I'm right, why don't you give her a call or write her a letter and ask her what you've asked us...and then maybe add a little of what I've told you here.
Hope everything works out.
2007-05-18 16:56:03 · answer #2 · answered by Miz D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is going to happen to you for the rest of your life. ALWAYS be very careful who you confide in. The person that is your best friend this year can be a total stranger in 2 years. It is best to keep your best confidence in people that are family and friends that you have been close to for at least 5 years, and even then you can grow apart. There needs to be a deep bond that cannot grow old before you open yourself with your dark secrets. You will be surprised how often you will find yourself saying, "I am glad I didnt tell that person about such and such when I thought we were very close" It happens often. But also that is how we grow emotionally is by experiencing these type of things and relationships throughout our lives.
2007-05-18 17:03:59 · answer #3 · answered by perryinjax 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear that. . . it happened to me too! Sometimes it's hard to know who to talk to about things like that. I had a similar situation recently with a good friend of mine from way back in high school tell me some things she'd been agonizing over and just needed to have someone to talk to. Like the good friend that I am I listened to her, tried not to be too judgmental, and she felt better afterwards. That was the more positive case. The not so positive case came when I told someone something just to confirm what they heard and they treated me like I had the plague and started talking nasty about me behind my back. But anyway, the point is sometimes it's hard to know who to talk to. Look at it as her loss, not yours. I hope that helps! :)
2007-05-18 16:58:58 · answer #4 · answered by Strawberry Fields 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, in many relationships the bond can be very superficial and any stress on it can unravel the whole thing. While this person was your freind from childhood you may have grown apart resulting in not recieving a Christmas card. Best of luck!
2007-05-18 16:53:11 · answer #5 · answered by John Gree 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well to me it don't sound like she was a very good friend if she didn't know your parents were splitting up because with me and my bff i am over her house all the time so you all i guess did not see alot of each other and i guess you thought you were better friends then she did so i would just get over it find some new friends and forget about it
2007-05-18 16:53:42 · answer #6 · answered by nikki b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think she is avoiding you because your parents separated. Does that even make sense? Sometimes people get busy. Pick up the phone and call her.
2007-05-18 16:51:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what you told her might have been kind of hard on her too. it sucks for anyone to find out that something you thought was good and solid isn't anymore. on top of that, she may just feel like she doesn't have anything to offer if she doesn't feel like she can relate. if her family is a good solid family, she just may not be able to sympathize.
2007-05-18 16:56:51 · answer #8 · answered by STEVEN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have you tried to talk to her since then? i think you should if you haven't. ask her if something is wrong to start off
2007-05-18 16:53:29 · answer #9 · answered by Rach 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she is going through something herself.
2007-05-18 16:52:10 · answer #10 · answered by Kelley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋