Idiots at it again I bet they get kicks if I fret, in their thinkin' they're wet?

Question

If U gets kicks when some one frets
You're a demon I bets
You're not nice you're a sourhead
You should be dead
Cause you love to make a mess
Ruining ones happiness
Insults them you start
Your game of it I want no part
By the insults you start
It's obvious you got no heart
Insults don't make you tall
Rather they make you small
A foolish child a pee wee
With no goodness in ye
You're an idiot in the most
I be there won't even be a ghost
Of Spirit when You die
Cause of the soul you deny!
You know not my way
You don't care what I say
Whether I not or be gay
It's not for you to say
Whatever I do for my way
Its up to me to say
So get off my case
U Plight of the human race!
You love causing pain
Driving many of us insane
Are U in Cohoots with doctors
Hospitals & drug sellers?
U want us against our will
Living dead on many a pill?
Because of the things You said
I truly wish you'd drop dead!

Actually this poem is condensed
from my original which was posted elsewhere in yahoo that I got praise
for! I guess condensing it was wrong
But I thought original was too long!
some of the original version here::
Insulters never care about good works
Cause obviously they are real jerks.
Insulters are nasty that is for sure
They are real evil that's too pure
Insulters have no ethical creed
Insulting is really a demonic deed

I bet the blah blah blah responder is the insulter they want to be the only
one that be the blabber!

It's not about threats.. its about my right to say or not say whether I not or be gay and my belief that insulters should drop dead.. they aren't fair they don't deserve to breathe the air! Oh by the way I got an award for my original version from Writers Digest Literary Guild

Answer 1

I think it's a pretty good poem, but that maybe the feelings should be more raw... I hope I'm making sense. Making the poem more consise would help the reader to feel the intensity of the emotion more than the threats. I think that if you concentrated the poem (increased the strength by double and decreased the words by half) it would be a really amazing poem and people would say, "DANG" after reading it.

I wish you luck on the poem! Good work! :)

Answer 2

Blah Blah Blah

Answer 3

i am sorry to say
this poem today
is the worst
i must say
you posted for feedback
oh how i wish please take it back

that is how bad your poem was