My boyfriend Mastubates in front of me?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years now and we are quite happy and are even living together, we have sex all the time except when its that time of the month and I cant have sex, yesterday was one of them I wasn’t feeling too well and I was tired so I couldn’t even do anything with him.. that’s when he started touching himslef and started mastubating in the same bed I was with him. I didn’t say anything as I WAS ABSOLUTELY shocked…He has never done this before and although I understand that it can be hard for guys at times but is that something I should be worried about as I have never seen this happen before. I just obviously slep off in disbeleive…Is this normal???

Answer 1

good for him

seriously show your disapproval - its not nice for you and he obviously is taking no care to save your feelings

Answer 2

I hope the answers you've already received will have shown you how childish your reaction was, and that you'll be a bit more sympathetic next time. In an adult sexual relationship self-stimulation should be just as common as mutual stimulation.

I've met many women who have fantasised about watching men do this, and if you're ever seen any porn you'll know that guys are very keen to see women doing it. Any person knows their own body better than anyone else (or should do), and this advantage should be used in all forms of sex.

The rule is simple: whatever pleases you and causes no harm is good. What happened may have shocked you, but you should get over that and put it to positive use.

CD

Answer 3

Hi there Sarah, Masturbation is a very natural and normal part of life. Some people find it a great turn on when their partner masturbates in front of them. What you need to sort out now is, after the initial shock, how did you feel about what your boyfriend did? If you are not comfortable with him doing that in front of you, then you will need to tell him. If you liked it, then maybe you could join in next time, by giving him a hand or 'service yourself' along side him. The important thing is that you both communicate and enjoy your intimate times together.

Answer 4

Personally, I think it is perfectly normal and healthy in a relationship. It is a heatwarming expression that he is comfortable enough to do this in front of you.

Instead of being shocked, it should have been a beautiful and spiritual moment for you.

There is nothing more beautiful thant breakdown of the ego and revealing of the innermost soul that occurs in an intimate relationship.

Only with true intimacy can we show each other the true animals that we really are. Intelligent animals, but animals nonetheless.

If he had done that when you first met you probably would have called the police, now it is ok! how far have you come!!

Answer 5

There is nothing at all wrong with this. Masturbation is perfectly normal and is part of every day life for both men and women. Why not join in with him, im sure it would be a real turn on, get yourself a toy and play with it on your own then when you are comfortable play with it at the same time as he does?

I would reccomend a rabbit from http://www.sexisland.co.uk they are very cheap, very discreet and have a great range.

Answer 6

It is normal for a guy to be so comfortable round a women to just wipe it out and start masterbating. I understand the last thing you wanted was to be touched, but if your man needs to be pleasured, why not reach other there and assist him. It would have completely blown his mind and may have opened new dialog for your love life. to masterbast by your self is one thing. But to have the women you love do it for you, man that can sometimes be better then having sex. give that a try next time and see if it helps.

Answer 7

You are his girlfriend and you sleep in the same bed with you. He didn't want to pressure you into anything, especially when it's "that time of the month" but there are other things you can do. Help him out, lend him a hand for goodness sake. But if you're feeling moody or just really not sexual, and not comfortable with him doing that next to you, give him a kiss on the cheek and tell him to use the bathroom. Everyone masturbates, it's normal. talk to him if your not comfortable though.

Answer 8

There is absolutely nothing wrong with it, perhaps he was hoping you would give him a hand? Don't shame him for it, there are lots of couples who do this together. It's not a big deal. He feels comfortable enough to do this in front of you, which means you have a very close relationship. There is nothing wrong with it at all. Perhaps if it bothers you that much you should speak with him about it, but first I would figure out why it bothers you and why you don't feel you can share this together?

Answer 9

It is perfectly normal. You share everything else. You've seen him naked. You have seen him having sex. What is the problem? He may have even thought that it turned you on. You do know that men like seeing women masturbate?

If it make you feel that uncomfortable, give him some help, or tell him how you feel. Don't just lay there silently. Your relationship can not progress if you hold back your feelings.

Answer 10

TALK TO HIM!!! not to people here.
if you live together and have a healthy relationship you should be able to talk to him about this. Tell him you feel uncomfortable about it. If he really loves you then he should respect when you don't want to have sex or can't for Auntie Flow reasons. If he really NEEDS to masturbate when he can't have sex, and this becomes an ongoing problem then there may be a medical explanation. I doubt this however, he just needs a good talking to!!!

Answer 11

Not talking to you about it is the strange part. Other than that two loving partners, masturbating in front of each other is perfectly normal.

Tell him you found it uncomfortable and see how you can perhaps make it fun for both of you in future. Perhaps when your not up for sex this is something you both could do instead.