My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me, and started going out with my best friend. what should i do? help!?

Question

I was going out with this one guy for almost 2 years. He broke up with me about 2 weeks ago and i was devastated. I cried everynight and sometimes during the day. Everybody knew how sad i was. A couple days later he asked out my best friend, and she said yes! I havent been talking to them much lately, because i'm very mad. I don't think this is how a real friend would act. She thinks i should be happy for her, but i think if we were friends she wouldn't have done that. who's right? and what should i do? please help! xoxo tiffany

Answer 1

Sounds like your friend is not really much of a friend. Chalk this up to a life experience and move on. Life is too short to waste it on ignorant people who do not care about you. There are billions of people out in the world, start forming new relationships and you will find that this blip in your life was just a stepping stone to a better future. Good luck to you!

Answer 2

it is not "good form" to accept a boyfriend from your best friend's trama...maybe a long time later in life or when your best friend is over it...
I say YOU are right to be upset...you not only lost the boyfriend but NOW you also have lost the best friend! (Sounds just like the Jerry Springer Show!) You can pretend to be social to her, but that is about all that can be expected of you. I have always heard and grown up with the rules that you just dont step on your girlfriend/boyfriend's friends. It is not really any different then when you are married and your best friend and your hubby are having an affair...it hurts, suddenly you cant talk to both of them...you lose your confidante (your friend) and your lover (boyfriend). I am sure you will get answers to the opposite on this, there is always someone that doesnt have rules to live by, but this is the "common sense" rules I live by. I would never do this to someone I had a close friendship with! I am SO sorry for you hun! My heart goes out to you! Sandra

Answer 3

Tiffany, this is a wonderful time for you. You have learned that this guy is not the right person for you to be with AND you have learned that your best friend is not a friend at all. Of course you learned in one of the worst possible ways, but the important part is now you know. You are completely free to go find a REAL boyfriend and a REAL best friend... if anyone at all. You are totally and completely free.

Answer 4

As hard as it looks today, and as much as it hurts right now? You won't even remember it in 5 years. and in 10 years, you may not even remember his name.

BUT! that doesn't help any for right now, does it?

He is going out with your best friend? so you lost them BOTH.

My advice? Stop any contact with either of them. Do not try to get them back, win them over, etc.

Spend time figuring out how to heal yourself. Do things you like. Go for walks, bicycle rides, get outside. Do THINGS.

Take up a new hobby. Walk or run. Learn needlepoint? Learn to tune hot rod cars? Just do something different.

Pay attention and make sure you keep on top of your studies. Do not worry about what other people have to say.

learn to be independent, and be comfortable with yourself, when you are alone. Spend time with your family.

Then, in another few weeks, you will hurt a little less. Maybe a little less every day.

Till you wake up happy, and do not even mind seeing them.

If you are happy with yourself, and happy being independent, you will be a much stronger person. When the guy dumps your ex-best-freind? and moves on to the next girl? you won't even care.

You will have found new freinds, and new hobbies, and are enjoying life.

A girl who enjoys life? and Knows what she wants? is VERY attractive.


good luck

Answer 5

Forget them both. No good boyfriend and no real friend would ever do something like that. By doing that while you were so distraught they showed a total disregard for your feelings. It is hard to break up with someone you have come to care so much about and then to see them go off with your friend is devastating, but realize that they are not worth it. You need to surround yourself with people who care about you and love you. Not people who are going to hurt you and end a meaningful relationship with you. They demonstrated that they don’t really care about you, they care about themselves. Let them have each other, do you think if they treat each other the way they treated you they are going to be good to one another? They may end up hurting each other as well and realize that you were not worth giving up. If they started a relationship so fast after you broke up chances are they were planning it for some time. You obviously can’t trust them and to have successful relationships with someone there has to be a level of trust. Take all the time you need to get over what happened and then move on with your life without them in it. Make friends who will treat you with respect and be there for you in your time of need and find a boyfriend who will make you forget about him. They aren’t worth your tears. It seems bad now because the wound is still fresh but you will be surprised that you can move on and get on just fine without them. Be strong, don’t accept what they have done to you and give them the satisfaction of hurting you and getting away with it.
Good luck and I hope you feel better.

Answer 6

girl I if the guys going after your best friend look at it as a blessing. Cause you know now what he's about. And as for your best friend..The only best friend you should have is God cause people in your life are always going to disappoint you. God will never betray you. He knows all your secrets and never let any one else know. So don't ever title a person that you know for a while or a long time as best friend. I've learned that title is wrong because no one is perfect.

Answer 7

I dont think you should be mad at her. You need to find something else to do to divert your mind. It is over with your boyfriend, so be gracious about it. You dont want people to think of you as upset! You want them to think of you as a nice good friend who is smiling ( even if crying on the inside) so move on . There is a bigger world awaiting you . Be the best you can be. Take some class or volunteer or travel or something different! Youll be fine and look back and laugh at this.

Answer 8

I think that your friend wasn't that good of a friend, she should have waited until you were somewhat moved on.As time goes on things will get better. As for you there are many other fish in the sea. Go out there and I am sure you can get a better guy.good luck and try not to be upset.

Answer 9

Get rid of the both of them! Your friend is trifling and your ex is a jerk. Life is too short and there's no need to bother with people like them. I'm pretty sure God has someone better in store for you anyway. Dry up those tears girlfriend and keep it moving.

Answer 10

Dump the guy and the so-called friend. Both of them are insensitive jerks. I've actually had the same thing happen to me. Only I knew the guy wanted to ask out my friend. So I talked to her and she swore she would not go out with him if it bothered me. She had a hickey on her neck that he gave her. THEY WERE ALREADY SEEING EACH OTHER. Or more accurately they were already having sex with each other.

That is no friend. She obviously does not care how much you are hurting or she would be comforting you and not going out with your ex. Rule of thumb is to never date a friend's ex.