I'm an atheist, but my ex-wife is a Christian. I now have sole custody of our 7 year old daughter, who we raised as a Christian. She has recently learned that Santa Claus doesn't exist. She started asking me about the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, etc. and I told her that they don't exist either. I'm tired of this Christian nonsense, so I also told her that it's the same way with Jesus. She cried for hours, and now she seems very depressed. I'm glad she's an athiest now, but what can I do to cheer her up?
2007-05-17 04:57:29 · 47 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Some of you don't seem to understand that I have SOLE CUSTODY of her. So her mother isn't going to "remind her" about Jesus.
I asked about how to cheer her up. You aren't being very helpful.
2007-05-17 05:15:47 · update #1
Ooo...you're in trouble. Shame on you. Matthew 18:6
But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.
2007-05-17 05:02:21 · answer #1 · answered by stakekawa 3 · 11⤊ 6⤋
You say you are "glad she's an atheist now", but you have to realize she is not an atheist because she has not come to that conclusion and she has not accepted it for herself.
It's too late now, but I would have hinted at it rather than just laying it on her like bomb. That coupled with the fact that it sounds like your getting custody of her was a recent event (?) was probably a bit too much to handle.
Hmm how to make her feel better... I honestly don't know! My kids have grown up with me discussing my atheism around them and to them. They are comfortable with the idea because it's *familiar*.
My son recently asked the Santa question. My rule is when the child asks the question, it's time to tell them to truth because they are starting to realize the truth on their own. If your daughter was not asking the questions about Jesus and God, she was *not* ready. Plus, I'd imagine that Jesus was spoken of far more often than Santa was, and so Jesus was more *real* to her than Santa.
I'd say you are in a position of damage control right now. Give it a few days or a few weeks, and then gauge if she wants to talk about it. If not, let her alone until she is ready.
Overall, very unwise move on your part!
2007-05-17 07:39:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your wife must be very happy with you. Don't worry though, your daughter will get over it, your wife will remind your daughter what she already knows about Jesus, and she will find out that the worst thing going on is that her daddy is the one with the problem, because he talks about Jesus like he doesn't exist. By definition, her father is hell bound. I wonder if she'll shed even one tear on that?
You had a vast array of people that are against not only what you did, but in taht you are declaring yourself intelectually suicidal, because you think that Jesus didn't exist, something that even the Jesus Seminar didn't agree with you on.
So you go ahead, your love for your daughter was just proven as not as important than your love for yourself, she's just a girl then? Why would you resign yourself to ignorance and act like it's truth when you are so unlearned? You like lying to your daughter? She's learning that her daddy just is too proud to say, " Honey, I don't know about Jesus, but Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny were just made up." Instead you have to talk out your butt to her.
Nice work, Dad.
2007-05-17 05:08:41 · answer #3 · answered by Christian Sinner 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My husband is an atheist, and even he thinks you were very rude and uncaring to take Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and Jesus away from her, all in one day. And so close to the time she lost her mother.
You destroyed her world view, the view you helped to build. This isn't easy for an adult, much less a child. She used to have a family, a heavenly father that loved her, and some invisible friends that gave her comfort. Now all she has is a father that cares more about his closed-minded rejection, about things that at very least gave your daughter comfort, then about her feelings. She is only seven for heaven's sake. You should at very least have given her time to adjust, between these revelations.
If you really want to cheer her up, and not just make yourself feel better, try telling her that Daddy is not perfect and thier is a chance that you could be wrong about Jesus, and that you will research the matter to find out for sure.
There are several books I can suggest to you
The New Evidence that Demands a Verdict
by Josh McDowell
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0785242198?ie=UTF8&tag=pathfinderschool&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0785242198
I Don't Have Enough Faith to Be an Atheist
Geisler and Turek
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1581345615?ie=UTF8&tag=pathfinderschool&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1581345615
Case for Christ by Lee Strobel
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0310209307?ie=UTF8&tag=pathfinderschool&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0310209307
Each of these books were written by people who were one time atheist but changed there minds after they looked at the Evidence.
2007-05-17 05:26:46 · answer #4 · answered by Mad Maxine 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, Jesus DID exist, and in his time he did try to do a lot of good things...
I happen to agree with you about Christianity, am not religious myself, and Jesus himself said that we're all children of god so I don't see any reason to think of him as more supernatural than anyone else.
It might help if you explain the traditions behind things like the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, and Santa...most of them are WAY older than Christianity and are pretty interesting.
I think life is amazing enough and doesn't really need religious embellishment...if your daughter is introduced to some of the wonderful and amazing things about life and our planet...that might help as well. Good Luck!
2007-05-17 05:10:24 · answer #5 · answered by TEM 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You have done her a great injustice. What does she have to look forward to?.Whether you believe in Christ or not you should wait until she asks you what you feel. Then you can tell her what you think. 7 years old is awfully young. Did you do this to spite your ex? What if your ex told your daughter that Jesus loves her no matter what and always will and you just burst her balloon? I think you should be ashamed of yourself. She's just a baby. If indeed you are telling the truth, there is nothing you can do to cheer her up. But I would tell your ex what you have done.
2007-05-17 05:32:05 · answer #6 · answered by gabeymac♥ 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Jesus DID exist (and still does, just not in a human capacity), so to cheer her up, tell her you lied to her and that he DOES exist. And just because you told her that, it doesn't neccesarily mean she's an athiest now. I pray she'll learn the truth despite your lies. Just because you don't believe in God doesn't mean you should rob her of that belief. If you did believe, then it would make sense that you would want her to believe too so her soul would be saved, but if you don't believe, and you just think it's a silly fantasy, then what's the harm in letting her hold on to her "fantasy" if that's what makes her happy? Don't you care about your daughter's happiness?
God bless you both. He loves you even if you don't love Him back and even if you don't believe in Him!
2007-05-17 05:17:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well first apologize, then tell her her Jesus does exist. Whether you believe in God or not, historically Jesus did exist.There is evidence that he existed just like there is evidence that people like julius ceaser,King Arthur and Cleopatra existed. And seeing as how she was raised Christian maybe you should respect her beliefs instead of tearing them down. I can tell you really love your daughter but dont you want her to be happy. You may be glad that she is athiest now but clearly she is not.Eventually she will decide what she really believes in her heart.
take care
2007-05-17 05:18:59 · answer #8 · answered by ♥LaBelleVie♥ 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Nice going...YOU are the one that got your daughter depressed...YOU should be a role model and believe in God...Unless you do, you will suck anyway as a father...You have a right to believe what you do, but for kids, you are no role model...and ultimately, I suspect that your daughter is more like her mother than you...While you can believe what you want to, SO TOO CAN YOUR DAUGHTER...Don't force your beliefs onto her...wondering why you got custody and not her mother...
2007-05-17 05:11:33 · answer #9 · answered by Terry C. 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Relinquish your rights as a parent and give the child back to her mother. You have now damaged this child on purpose to get back at her mother for bringing her up a Christian. You do not deserve to be this child's father any longer. You have probably started your daughter on a long life of mental illness and you should be ashamed of yourself for abusing your child this way
2007-05-17 05:15:44 · answer #10 · answered by tebone0315 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
How could you do that to a child....shes only 7...didn't you know this would hurt her...
So your an Atheist...big deal...why do you have to make her the same...and it sounds like she believed...you sound proud of this that she cried for hours...how could you do this to a 7 year old little girl...you don't deserve her at all...Your tired of Christian Nonsense and I am sick of people like you.......if I knew where you lived..
I WOULD REPORT YOU FOR
CHILD ABUSE...
2007-05-17 05:07:04 · answer #11 · answered by Kerilyn 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋