At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally , the guys'
side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good . )
We always hear " the rules " From the female side .
Now here are the rules from the male side .
These are the rules!
Please note. . these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1 . Men ARE not mind readers .
1 . Learn to work the toilet seat .
You're a big girl . If it's up, put it down .
We need it up, you need it down .
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down .
1 . Sunday sports . It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides .
Let it be .
1 . Shopping is NOT a sport .
And no, we are never going to think of it that way .
1 . Crying is blackmail .
1 . Ask for what you want .
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1 . Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question
1 . Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it . That's
What we do .
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for .
1 . A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem . See a doctor .
1 . Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument .
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days .
1 . If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us
To act like soap opera guys .
1 . If you think you're fat, you probably are .
Don't ask us .
1 . If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one . .
1 . You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done .
Not both .
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself .
1 . Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials .
1 . Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we .
1 . ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings .
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit . We
have no idea what mauve is .
1 . If it itches, it will Be scratched .
We do that .
1 . If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
nothing's wrong .
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle .
1 . If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
You don't want to hear .
1 . When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine .
Really .
1 . Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf .
1 . You have enough clothes .
1 . You have too many shoes .
1 . I am in shape . Round IS a shape!
2007-05-16 21:52:59 · 17 answers · asked by mandy 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
kellythered: well excuse me for sharing!! i thought it was funny and decided to pass it on. dont be such a miserable cow!
2007-05-16 22:43:43 · update #1
I think that's hilarious. =) Anyone with a sense of humor would find it funny and mostly TRUE!!!! Those that don't need to lighten the frick up!! Or not go reading through the "jokes and riddles" section of answers.
2007-05-17 09:54:03 · answer #1 · answered by gidget 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
The toilet seat, how true.
Very good and ingenious I am defo gonna print this off and Quote some, thats if the wife lets me!!! Lol
2007-05-16 21:57:30 · answer #2 · answered by Tooly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so basically all a guy wants is sex with no real closeness in a relationship, they are all perfectly happy to just sit around doing nothing all day and not make sure their partners are even feeling alright??
no wonder there are so many lesbians all of a sudden! lol
btw i have never met a girl that has 'rules'...isnt that just america??
;)
2007-05-16 21:59:36 · answer #3 · answered by Joo! 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
wow this is really good girl i love it somuch and plus i noticed that you is putting out some really cool and funny jokes good job girl and keep up the good work because you really is on the ball girl and thanks for making me laugh because i should did need it and take care girl because you really did hit the spot with this one lol 10/10.
2007-05-17 00:50:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
1,ok not bad but i hate to say this is CUT AND PASTE there is nothing original here,
2, and if thats the best way to get a few replies, dont waste your/our time.
P.S they are numbered 1 and 2 on purpose, (i can count)
P.S i am not a miserable cow, i am realistic, what makes this more pathetic is that your a woman who has posted this crap! i understand its lighthearted and yes i can be a miserable old moo sometimes, and yes my sense of humour can be somewhat lacking, but you know what i have met men like that and you know what else they where arseholes, with no character and even fewer morals and i want men to have as little excuse as possible for treating women like crap because women like you print this crap they thinks its acceptable.
2007-05-16 22:04:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 4⤋
an additional rule:
"we (men) dont need to shave. Chest hair keeps us warm. But we would prefer you to shave, however."
2007-05-16 22:05:29 · answer #6 · answered by sunny 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
hahaha worth the read
2007-05-16 21:56:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rules are for fools! They have numbered it one because the only rule they remember is. "FEMALES ARE FUN!" Stand by the rules and you will have "NONE!"
2007-05-16 22:41:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I love it, especcially number 1, so true.
2007-05-16 21:59:02 · answer #9 · answered by me 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Very well written i totally love it
and so true
2007-05-16 22:05:22 · answer #10 · answered by Dark Crystel 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋