The Other Woman?

Question

I read an answer from one of the questions advising a girl to keep connecting with another girl's boyfriend.

My relationship with my boyfriend was going well and a friend who has her own boyfriend kept calling my boyfriend for company on the phone and calling him everyday cause her boyfriend was busy and now he has broken up with me and spends alot of his time with her. She doesn't have much friends who are girls and most of her "close" friends are guys. She says she is not with my ex but I think they are and she is also with her boyfriend and 3 other guys. How will I help my ex open his eyes and that she was just playing with his feelings without appearing bitter. I love him and I don't want him hurt. Till today she doesn't think her actions are wrong and thinks everybody is out to get her. She is now playing the injured party and stringing 4 guys. Advise anyone? And how can I be a friend to my ex and hope we'll patch back.

Thanks for all your helpful answers. There is no right and wrong answers and all have good answers. But what should I do if he wants to try again.. she will get caught sooner or later. But how can guys being played open their eyes when a woman player is so good at it. She says her growing up life is hard and such but she doesn't realise her actions are wrong and yes we're not talking anymore. She makes it seem she is telling her boyfriend the bad and good in everything. She even said she told her bf my ex likes her. And to catch her and tell my ex will seem like "sour grapes". I just don't want him hurt. Should I just ignore him and wait for him to start conversations with me or should I still msn him occasionally or ?? I'm so lost and confuse.

Btw, I told my ex he was spending too much time with her then and I told her the same. She turn around and said I hurt her and backstab her. How do I defend myself once and for all? I am too soft. She explained to me that she only treat him as a friend and in the same sentence says she talks to him for hours. Then she said I hurt her feelings for feeling that way and keeps telling everybody I backstab her. Apparently one day she told my bf she loves him and in the next moment was flirting with another guy and told my ex that guy had problems with his gf and she was trying to help. She even talked to another friend of mine and my friend told her, her actions were wrong, she kept saying she didn't mean it and was using my bf for company cause her bf wasn't free. Then went on about me backstabbing her again. Then she talked to another guy and said my ex lied about them being together. How do I stop her from saying untruths about me and hope my ex opens his eyes.

Answer 1

When someone is so enamoured with a person, they tend to not see the flaws, she may tell him that she loves him and that the other guys are friends. stringing him along. And he probobly believes her. Having these guys around makes her feel superier, it gives her an ego boost. So when someone tells her what she is doing is wrong she won't listen because she feels good about herself and that everyone else is wrong for being jealous of her.

Basically the only thing you can do for your ex, is to not say anything at all, because he will think that you are just jealous of your friend. Eventually word will get around and she will get caught. And as for your friend, you need to sit down with her and tell her that what she did is cruel, and that she needs to understand your feelings too, not just her own. And if she still doesn't listen than she is not really your friend, clearly she already isn't she doesn't seem to care about anyone else but herself, and you don't deserve such cruelty forget them both and just move on.

Answer 2

Girl, if you're truly still "friends" with your Ex, (as I am with mine) then just explain your concerns about this girl as you would to any friend - hopefully he'll listen. All you can do is try, but at least you make the effort.

Answer 3

Unfortunately you just have to stand back and let him find out for himself. As you said, anything else he would interpret as sour grapes. Try to be there for him when it happens, but expect that he's going to feel pretty foolish, and isn't going to want you to tell him so. But do you really want a guy who would let you go so easily, and for someone so unworthy?

Answer 4

I suggest you dump both the bastard but not before doing something about it.
Get the other woman a nice looking boy tp "play" with her emotion and than to dump her.
As for your bf when he comes back to you lead him on and than dump him off.
This will teach others not to "steal" and taking you for granted.
It is bad advice but it is the best lesson to teach some of this idiots.

Answer 5

things come around to you .recently me and my boyfriend was at a funeral that he was the pastor at and was praying for a girl who was sorry for what she had done .she knew me but i did not know her. that is because we were praying for the girl who had been with my now ex-husband because he was cheating on me with her now I'm praying for her.that had to be a eye opener

Answer 6

Go outside the box.

Answer 7

variety my dear is the spice of life so 4get him n try some1 else. i m sure u ll find some1 better then him. no need 2 worry time will tell him truth. n he will understand what he has lost

Answer 8

She clearly is not a friend to you. Move away from him and her. I know that you love him and care for her as a friend, but how much do they care or love you?

Answer 9

well catch the girl with another guy
and take a picture of them doing something
example:kissing, hugging, eating
then when you see your ex
show him the pictures

Answer 10

well the only way to make him see is to actually show him whats going on.....to catch her red handed or something