Where is He?

Question

I have always been a very spiritual person. I believe in God. I have always felt him near me. I know that he has saved me many times in my life. I was a Sunday school teacher. I participated in church activities. I love God and felt His love for me. I went to a Christian school. Then, I started having all this stress in my life. There were things that I couldn't figure out about myself and why I did some things that were totally out of character for me. I had a lot of guilt. I was really depressed and anxious. There were some major changes in my life and I didn't do well w/ them. Where is God when I need Him the most? I've begged and pleaded for Him to show me a way out of this mess. I feel as if He has left me. I feel empty inside. I no longer feel His presence. Am I in the "desert" as it is referred to? What about footprints, is this when He's carrying me? I feel so alone. Any thoughts?

Answer 1

you know, you just described my life up until a few years ago. i thought as you, that i was a spirtual person, until literally all hell broke loose. it was bad. i even had a nervous breakdown. actually the breakdown as i look back now was the best thing that could have happened to me. yeah. weird.
but i'm answering your question in hopes that you don't have to go through what i did.
i learned through the whole thing that my so-called being a spirtual person, and the church outings, etc were really all not reality.
there is a scripture reading, (can't remeber what book) that put it all in a nutshell. it was a parable of two situations. a man built his home, but he laid a not so deep foundation. the waters came and thrusts themselves against the foundation of his house, and the house fell.
another man did the same thing, except he dug into the ground as deep as he could in order to build his foundation for his house. the waters came, thrust themselves against his house, the waters receded, and his house was still standing.
when i suffered the breakdown, i was the first house, built on a shallow foundation. i fell apart. i did not dig deep down enough before building my house.
that now brings me to the breakdown. why i say it was the best thing that could have happened to me.
my house (me) was in shattered ruins. there was no where left for me to go or hide in. it was either give up, stay depressed for who knows how long, and end up taking all kinds of pills to try to combat the depression and stress.
OR fight for my life. not my old life, there was nothing left of that, and i did not want that old life back anyways, thats what got me there in the first place. fight for a new, better, happier life. since there were no old pieces left to pick and try to glue back together again, i had to find new pieces. the only place left to find those new pieces was to start digging deep down inside and find out literally what made me tick.
i found out that in reality i was a spirtual person alright, but not just not "in the spirit". those are two different things. spirtual to me was "learned things". in the spirit is having a true deep relationship with god and myself. i had to face myself and tell myself that i really did not have god in my life. i read about him, sang about him, said words (prayers) to him. but when it came down to it, i had to wipe the slate clean of all the things i did not want to deal with. like give up certain hobbies, or jobs, or possesions, i had to stop being prideful and judgemental. we all are. i had no one to turn to except god. no one would help me. no one wanted to be around a depressed or stressed out person.
yet, i was always to busy to spend quiet time with god. there was always other things that got in the way of praying. like too much work. i made a priorty of work and all the things it could give me. sooo i was too tired and stressed at the end of the day to spend time maybe reading the bible
S L O W L Y, in order to try to take in what gods words were telling me. i also put off not resolving old issues in my life, because maybe they were too painful to recant.
after the breakdown, with nothing more left for me or anyone else. god came in my life at that moment and took over. he wanted to be around that beaten, depressed, stressed out person that no one else wanted to be around. he made me face myself, while he held my hand and wiped my tears.
so don't have a nervous breakdown. start digging a new foundation NOW. before it gets out of hand, it gets harder to pick up the pieces. believe me, i was there.

Answer 2

Boy there are some idiots on this site. Why on GODS green earth would these morons that do not believe in God, be answering questions about religion and spirituality. They need to be answering something they have knowledge of like what its like to live in hell. Because that is where they will all be!!! But don't worry...we can pray for them...for they need it more than anyone!!!

As far as your situation goes...be strong...you know as well as I do that he is there. Keep the faith!! He will never put anything on you that you cannot handle! You are a strong individual with God on your side. The answers may not be given to you directly, but you will be given the wisdom to make the decisions you need to make!! God carries us all...everyday...and the reason you do not feel him all the time is because that is when satan himself enters your heart and makes you question Gods presence! Do not let him do it. Pry, pray, pray then pray some more. You will find strength in his name...I promise. You know what I have been through this year and the fact that I am still a functioning human is proof that his strength will guide you!! You have to "Let go, and let God" as they say. Turn your pain and confusion over to God and he will take care of it and ease your pain. Just keep following his path and you will soon emerge into his gardens!!! God Bless you, I loveyou, God loves you, and may peace be with you. He is there...just close your eyes and speak to him...you may not hear it, but you will feel his response.

And to those of you that do not believe...I feel so sorry for you...how do you make it through a single day in this world without faith? And without the belief that he is there? I would hate to live that life. But I will pray for you!

Answer 3

What you feel is typical to a Christian who is in a deep trouble. I experienced this several yrs ago when I was not a Christian at all. When I came out of it 2 yrs ago, I became a Christian.

Be patient, my friend. In a few years, when you look back, God will let you know what He did for you when you couldn't find Him. He is with you right now. He is closer to you than ever before. When the strong light is so close to you, your eyes simply can't see anything. That's normal. Whatever you are going through. Don't blame God. Thank Him. Don't lose faith. Strengthen your faith in Him. God loves you!! God never leaves anyone alone !!

Answer 4

I am in your SAME exact predicament. Everything you said describes me exactly. I got a new job out of college and the stress kicked in. (High school teacher...enough said) I drifted farther and farther from God because I didn't have "time" to pray. I would go days and days without praying. It got worse and worse. I did things out of character for me and was ridden with guilt as well. What has helped me is seeking out other Christians my own age and hanging around with them. (Bible study, dinner, etc.) I also took an Alpha class at my church. It was amazing. You should ask your church if they offer it. It REALLY helped to renew my faith. I have recently begun to really pray and put my trust in God and for the first time in a long time I feel like He's guiding my path again. I think that he was guiding me all along, but I just was too blind and separated from Him by sin to hear Him. I have found that now that I have made the time to pray and even more time to listen, along with putting my complete trust in Him, I feel his presence more. I hope that you can get back what you once had. The worst feeling I ever had was remembering back to what I used to have with God and not feeling it anymore. I think that it is gradually coming back, and I trust God to reinstate me! Good luck!

Answer 5

[Pray] is what you eat,and to say your prayers is to make a [hail marry] [hail storms] [number one] or a [our father] [they staff] [number two] what is a word? but the name of a person,place or thing and no mater how you brake it up water is water and staff is staff so the dust we walk on and the water we wash with need only God to make flesh there is no more thats it.
{soul} the inside underneath or unseen portion of
{spirit} water that carries any other properties
Now that you see what they did to the word and the word was God and [God] is this word [bacterium] the only thing that can take water and dust and make flesh just a small [bacteria] that multiplies 10 times over at 98.6 and when it fall to the water and everything was just right it fermented and from that ferment did God put air and in that air so did the mist of Gods spirit rise and come back to the dust and bring life to everything for his small movement in the dust did make a void and fill it with love and spirit.

Answer 6

Candy,

There might be a couple of things at play here.

One of the most serious though is determining if you ever actually had a genuine salvation experience. This is not a derogatory accusation. It is something that unfortunately is all too common. Well meaning people that have been misled about Christianity.

Go to this link and listen to the "True and False Conversion" audio. It might be helpful.

~Neeva

Answer 7

Candy, dont doubt God. He is there for you. You need to persevere and keep on pursuing God. Read Philipians 4: 6-7.
God loves you and the proof is He died for you on the cross. Don't be anxious. Trust Him!

Answer 8

One of two things come to mind:

1. You may be clinically depressed. Or perhaps have some other problem with your thought processes. You might benefit by talking to your doctor. I've suffered from depression , great depression, but, with my doctor's help, I got out of it. Stress can cause this.
2. You sound like you have gotten involved with some particular sin. If so, you know what it is. Sin does cause us to fall out of fellowship with God. You can't lose your salvation, but God cannot look upon sin and must turn away. Only repentence and confession will repair the damage and restore fellowship with God.
3. It could be a combination of both.

I feel as though your problem is depression because of the way you talk about it. When I talk about that time in my life, I describe it like I was in a deep, dark hole and couldn't find a way out or see any light. I stayed there 7 years. The death of my father brought it on. The fact that I got angry at God, something I thought I could never do, was my downfall. I had a dramatic salvation experience and lived for God for years before my father died (much like you describe). My father was a good, wonderful person who was loved by everyone who knew him. It was just too much for me to lose him. But, the thing that hurt my heart most was my anger at my Lord. This had a horrible guilt effect on me and the depression overtook my life for those 7 years. My friends loyally kept contact with me and prayed for me as did my family. During that time I knew I was in trouble, but I couldn't come out of it. I became a recluse. I, too, did things very out of character for me. I value my family very much, but, during this time, I didn't want them around. Only my husband. I stayed in the bed room with the blinds closed. Never went anywhere. Even church. At the time, I had a wonderful doctor who was tuned in to my depression. She helped my through medication and counselling. God used her to heal me.
I will pray for you and sincerely hope you go to your doctor. May God surround you with His love, and heal your broken spirit. He loves you and wants you to know He is for you. He will never forsake you....He promised. God bless and keep you .

Answer 9

GOD has three answers to prayer:

1. YES
2. NO
3.WAIT


JESUS: I am the Way, the Truth and the Life. No man comes to the Father but by Me."

"Hear O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One"

(Shema Yisrael Adonai eloheinu Adonai ehad)

Answer 10

Yep, this is what happens.
Time to Learn, Time to Grow.


Kenneth Copeland Ministeries
Fort Worth, Texas

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