He cheated on me what do i do?

Question

My ex had to go visit his dad (his dad was goin to have surgery) well my now ex got stuck and couldnt come back (not enough money to get back home like we thought) well he was missing me alot but after a while he started cheatin on me with his ex. He denyied it for about 5 months. he called me on mothers day cause we have a baby girl....and wanted to talk to me...he sounded miserable. So i asked him if he regreted cheatin he said yes and i asked him if he would lose the homewreakin and come back to me.....he said yes. Should i take him back or move on?

He had to go to ohio for his dads surgery he got lonely and decied to cheat yes everybody says once a cheater always but hello I cheated on him the first tiem we got together and I havtn sence about Janurary of 05 so no not always a cheater sometime you cant figure things out. We had a long distance relastionship we both cheated at the same time not knowing it, I stopped and he asked me to come to hio so i did cause i loved him well we both were happy and then tell y amore later gtg

Answer 1

once a cheater always a cheater - end of discussion

Answer 2

Well it all depends.

Was he actually stuck there? I'm sure you could find that out. How long did he hold out before he cheated, and how often do the two of you have sex at home? Did he pursue her, or did she come onto him? It's by no means an excuse, but guys can get a bit crazy when we're used to getting it all the time and then have nothing for an extended period of time, and couple that with an attractive woman actively pursuing sex with us, and well, every guy has a limit to how long he can say no. If a man denies it, he is a liar. That doesn't make it right or excuse it by any means. We can stop pursuing sex, and be faithful indefinitely in that regard, but when an attractive woman is coming onto us in a weakened state like that, we're powerless.

Weigh your decision with that little bit- if he lied about actually being stuck, he was just creeping around intentionally. If we're talking like a week before he slept with his ex, or that he was going after her, its majorly incriminating. But if he was literally stuck there, and held out for several months against advances from his ex, I think his actions are understandable, even if not justifiable. And in particular, that case would cause a lot of guilt and likely delay the confession significantly too.

Ultimately, what it comes down to is whether or not you can forgive him. But situations like this aren't as clean cut as some would have you think.

Answer 3

Well, sometimes things happen and we can move on, but other times it doesn't work out that well. I cheated on my boyfriend (now my husband) 3 or 4 times. We broke up everytime, but we were both so miserble without each other and got back together. Maybe he just has some issues to work out like I did. Give him another chance, but if he cheats on you again dump him. Don't feel like you have to stay with him because the two of you have a baby. That is the worst thing to do.

Answer 4

I once bit my fingernail 7 years ago, no matter how far down I cut it and no matter how many times I accidently draw blood I can't kick the habbit. In other words once you start something and get away with it chances are your going to do it over and over again. And for the love of God don't stay together for the kids sake, that just creates a warzone of an enviroment to grow up in.

Answer 5

Well I don't think you should that whole didn't have enough money to get back home sounds like a BS. Being you have a child together it is hard you don't want to put your daughter through any problems if you do make the decision to get back together make sure it is what you want because you do not want another break up.

Answer 6

Move on ! There are plenty of men in this world that will make you happy with out all the games & B.S. Good Luck ! Also don't ask him again if he's sorry or want's you back because you did nothing wrong he cheated , he made his bed & now he has to lay in it weather he's miserable or not .

Answer 7

Move on, I know it sounds like he wants to come back but when someone goes 5 months of cheating it shows he cares nothing about you or your daughter. Sorry to say it like this but you need to move on, and if you don't you will be stuck in a hole with him for a very long time.

Answer 8

If you have to ask this question you probably know the answer. If you take him back you become the sucker. You let him get away with it and possible give you some disease. He obvioulsy wasnt missing you, just his ex. If he loves you he could have waited. He is weak and no woman needs a weak man dragging her down, get out now before it happens again, and believe me, he knows he can get away with it so he will.

Answer 9

Once a cheater, always a cheater. You may still love him but, he didnt love you enough not to cheat. He only wants to come back coz he has no where else to go. That isnt your problem. Let him go.

Answer 10

Personally, he sounds like a loser. No excuse for a man to leave his family and then not come back, and he was having fun the whole time with his ex...
So how does he have money to come now when he didn't have it before, and who is supporting your children? If I were you I would tell him to stay away, he picked his bed.

Good luck for you,
Mariah

Answer 11

Move on, girl. Have a little self-respect. You can't trust him anymore and you know that. Think about your daughter and what's best for her. Having an abusive husband (emotionally) isn't good for her or you. No cheaters, girl! We don't have room for guys like that in our lives.