How to get your roommate to do the dishes?

Question

I have many unresolved issues with my roommate, but the main one is how to get her to do the dishes. I have done the dishes the last 3-4 X in a row. She has had of work both saturday and sunday this week and she didn't bother to do them. I ate out almost every day last week and she didn't so why should I have to do dishes that aren't mine. Does anybody have any good ideas or suggestions?

She has a set of four dishes of her own so I can't take those away. She has been using some of my dishes because she is all out of her's though. I may just switch to paper and plastic plates and silverware all the time then I can say that I didn't use any so I'm not gonna clean any, but then there still would be th pans and pots that I have used.

Answer 1

My college dormmate didn't wash the dishes, either. Finally, what I had to do to resolve the situation was that I would wash ONLY MY dishes (those that I used, and they were my dishes... there were no "common" dishes). Soon, she had no clean dishes left to use. I also kept my dishes locked away so she could not use them for herself.

Drastic, maybe, yes, but extreme situations call for extreme measures!

She was a total "mess" of a person, and by mid-December, we were nearly drawing lines between "HER" side and "MY" sides of the room. She had no respect for anyone but herself. She would ask me to wake her up on a Saturday morning, to be sure she got up because she didn't want to miss whatever plans she had. When I went to wake her up (gently), out of her mouth came a stream of curses and vulgarities!!! I was hurt and astounded... here she asks me to do her a favor, I do it, and all I got was cursed out!

When your roommate runs out of clean dishes, she'll have to either wash her dishes or buy disposables! But DO NOT... repeat.. DO NOT start washing her dishes, or she will start the "neglect" cycle all over again.

Answer 2

I have the same problem with my roommate. Just this Sunday I got into it with her because she had the kitchen looking a mess for a week. If I don't clean the kitchen it won't get done! This Sunday I just called her and told her to stop being a pig a clean up after her self because she is not living on her own and she has to respect the fact that she has a roommate. Another thing I try to do is keep the dishwasher unloaded so it won't be no reason to leave the dishes in the sink she can just put it in the dishwasher and when it full I turn it on and just unload it when it done.

Answer 3

Since you do the dishes she feels she does not have to do them.

I had an issue like this with a few roommates some time ago. I would do their dishes and they would never do them or respect me, so I stopped washing the dishes they made dirty.

I hated it, but they let their dishes stack up for ONE MONTH! before doing the dishes and scrubbing off all the caked on crap and smelly stuff from their cooking.

Talk to her, tell her to do her own dishes, and DO NOT wash the dishes she makes dirty.

Put all of YOUR dishes somewhere she can't get to, and use paper plates and silverware that you can hide somewhere so she can't use them when her dishes get dirty.

She WILL eventually do her dishes.

Answer 4

I had this same problem with my friend. This seems to be a common occurrence with a roommate. Hence the reason I refuse to have on anymore. Anyway, just buy paper utensils. This will help your problem twofold.
1. You will no longer have any dishes to wash, thus saving you time and effort.
2. All the dishes in the sink suddenly become your roommate and she can no longer argue about who's dishes. She will truly look like a slob at that point. Many times people worry they are washing your dishes. This way she won't have that worry anymore

Answer 5

Switching to paper plates is an awesome idea. That's what I do with my sister. I don't really eat at home but when I do I use paper plates so I don't have to wash all of her and her kids dishes. Or just tell your roommate, politely, you know we should wash our own dishes as we dirty them to avoid a pile up and a burden for each other. Communication always works it never fails. Just remember to be kind and expect kindness.

Answer 6

I have a very strict rule when it comes to dealing with roommates...if I didn't do it, I will not clean it. Plain and simple. In the end, the other roommate talks a lot of crap about me...but I don't care. I'm not the one eating on the plates, or cooking food, why do I have to clean it?
I'm not the one leaving my towels in the living room, why do I have to wash your towels?

This, of course, will only work if you can stand messes. I'm pretty good at maintaining the craziness of messes (if it gets to be too much for you, just start making comments about it, "Man, we really gotta do those dishes." but don't move to do them.) Eventually your roommate will be tired of living in her own filth and will clean it. Then when you PRAISE her for it (you can't skip the praise otherwise it will never happen again) she might feel good and continue doing them when things get drastic again, and will eventually do them before the dish situation gets drastic...it takes time and patience, but it will be worth it.

Answer 7

Inform her that you will do your own dishes, and she must do hers, otherwise they will not get done.

If this doesn't work, you have a few other options:

1. Go halfers on an automatic dishwasher.
2. Put her dirty dishes in her bed, preferably under her pillow and sheets.
3. You both start using paper plates, plastic cups and utensils, or else she can, if you are willing to do your own dishes. In any case, the dishes chore sharing arrangement must end now, seeing how she apparently refuses to do her part.

Answer 8

you're precise in view which you're making an attempt to guard your individual stuff and don't anticipate others will understand what's yours and what isn't. i'm assuming others are annoyed along with her. Have yet another team assembly and say that it fairly is extra handy for her to segregate her dishes so others do not make a tragic mistake (!!!). it fairly is her duty. the only different treatment is for her dishes to be the only ones that are crimson, as an occasion. I mean a blatant colour-code difficulty. yet she's already offered her dishes so as that isn't artwork. besides, at this assembly do not seem as though each and every person is ganging up on her. tell her which you do not choose her dissatisfied, yet you all have adequate happening to be concerned approximately your individual stuff, not hers. it fairly is her duty. With 9 human beings I applaud your means to make it artwork. there is absolute to be some human beings extra troublesome than others. stable success.

Answer 9

Roommates should have a shared "chore" list. Agree, in writing, to do the dishes, every other day. You Mon, her Tues, etc. Or, everyone is responsible for their own dishes they used at each meal, or, dishes are to be done after each meal. Usually one doing them every other day, and the other, the other days, is what works best. Or, if the one who cooks, does not do the dishes. For instance, Mon., you cook dinner, your roommate is responsible for washing the ishes right after dinner (okay-within a half hour-let dinner digest a little first). She cooks, you do the dishes. And, take turns fairly. If that does not work, then please feel free to switch to paper plates, etc. Hope this works! take care.

Answer 10

Good question. Did you talk to her about this? Consider asking her to pay more than half of the rent to make up for the fact that you are doing her dishes. Figure out how much time it takes you, and also your therapist bills for the stress that she is causing you, and say that she will have to pay more for rent and have the itemized cost ready to show her. If that doesn't work, take all the dishes out of the cupboards and hide them so she can't use them until she smartens up. And you know what? It might not bother her to have dirty dishes lying around - work on getting her to see it from your point of view.
Good luck!